A New Kind of Dangerous

Raven came home from school and bummed around for a wile smoking a joint and messing around on her computer. She got up around five o'clock to get ready for their date. She showered, curled her hair, applied her makeup, and put on a cute black dress. She wondered if she looked like she was trying too hard, but didn't change or anything. At 6:30 she grabbed her car keys and carefully walked down the stairs, not wanting to trip on her two inch heels. “Your very dressed up, where are you going?” Her step mom asked her. “Oh you know, just out with a friend” She didn't want them to get all excited about her going out on a date because it's not like there would be another one to follow. At least not with the same girl. “Friend my ass!” She exclaimed. “Who is she?” She gave her dad a pleading look and he came to her rescue. “Have fun with your friend honey, don't be out too late” He came over and hugged her. “Your welcome” He whispered in her ear. She grinned and headed out the door.

On the drive over to Jae's house, she is surprisingly nervous. To calm her nerves, she lowly plays classical music and smokes a cigarette. What if she does something wrong? What if Jae doesn't like the restaurant she picked out for them? A million things could go very wrong, but wait, why did she care? She did not get involved. She could not get involved. It was the main rule, just one date, or one good fuck and the BAM, they don't exist anymore.

She pulls up to Jae's house and shuts the car off, taking her time walking to the door as she is a few minutes early and she doesn't want to seem like a loser. She rings the doorbell and an older woman answers. Is that her mom? She has to be, she looks like an older version of Jae. The woman smiles at her. “Hello, I'm Jae's mom, and you must be her date.” Raven was surprised with how accepting her mom seemed of her daughter being a lesbian and just for a moment she missed her mom. Just for a moment she wished her mom was accepting of her lifestyle. “Yes, I'm Raven. It's nice to meet you.” She said, shaking her hand. She stepped inside and looked around, her house was really nice. “Honey” Jae's mom called “Raven is here.” A man who looked to be in his forties came out of the other room. She assumed he was her dad. “Nice to meet you Raven.” They shook hands. “Where are you and Jae going tonight?” He asked her. “I was going to take her to Fujiymas, that new Japanese restaurant that just opened downtown.” Her father nodded and just then Jae came downstairs in a dark red dress, straight hair, and silver heels on. Raven had to catch her breath when she looked at her. “She looks gorgeous.” Raven thought. She them scowled at herself for thinking like that. She wouldn't allow herself to give into someone. “Are you ready?” Raven asked her. Jae nodded and they said goodbye to her parents.

Conversation carried easily between the two as Raven drove them to the restaurant. They pulled up and Raven turned down We R Who We R by Ke$ha and turned to Jae. “Um. I hope you like Japanese food. It's one of my favorites and I've been wanting to try this place since it's new and all. We can go somewhere else if you want.” Jae's hand touched her shoulder. It sent chills up her spine. “Raven, I love Japanese food. This is absolutely perfect. Stop being so nervous.” Raven took a deep breath. She could do this. Raven nodded and they got out of the car.

They were quickly seated and they ordered their drinks. They chatted casually for a few minutes before Jae excused herself to go to the bathroom. Raven turned around and made sure no one was looking before pulling a silver flask out of her purse and dumping it's contents into her Coke. She shouldn't have done it, but the rum calmed her nerves almost instantly. She didn't know why she was so nervous. Jae obviously had a huge crush on her. Jae came back and the waiter came to take their order. “I'll have the California Sushi Roll” Jae ordered. Raven hadn't even picked up a menu and quickly flipped through hers. “I'll take the New York Sushi Roll.” She loved sushi and she also didn't want to seem like a pig by ordering chicken or something. The waitress left and their was silence for a moment. Raven decided to try to break the ice between them.

She planned on asking about Jae's family or friends, but that's totally not what ended up coming out. “So tell me” Raven inquired “Why are you so attracted to me?” Oh my god, did she seriously just say that? This was going to end badly. She felt so stupid suddenly and just wanted to go crawl under a rock. To her relief, Jae laughed. “Way to break the ice.” She joked. Raven felt herself blushing and looked down. Jae suddenly stopped laughing. “Oh, you were serious? Honestly, it's your attitude oh and your good looks.” Her attitude? Her attitude was shitty towards everyone and she was just beginning to realize what a complete bitch she had been to everyone for the past month. “My attitude?” “Yeah, your attitude. You act like your so tough and don't give a shit, but I can see right through all that. I've known you for years Raven and you are honestly and truly one of the sweetest girls I have ever met. Every single time I saw you with a new girl, I knew that you could do better. I wished that I could have you, but I thought I wasn't your type. I thought that I was too ugly for you.” Raven felt so bad now and she couldn't resist taking Jae's hand in her own. She was beginning to see Jae in a new light and she didn't like the way she was starting to feel. It was scaring her. She had built this wall around her for a purpose, now this girl was tearing it down all in an hours time. “I never knew.” She said quietly. “All these years and I never knew the way you felt about me. I guess I need to learn how to see better.” That got an honest and true smile from Jae and it warmed Raven's heart to see it.

Their food came and they began to eat, talking about everything you can imagine between bites. Raven told her the story as to why she moved here and Jae talked about her past with girls. They both told their coming out stories to each other and talked about their likes and dislikes. Before they both knew it, it was almost 9:30 and the restaurant was closing soon. Raven paid the bill, Jae tried to object, but she insisted so she gave in and put 5 dollars down for the tip. They got in the car and Raven checked her cell phone. “It's only 9:30.” She told her. “Do you wanna do something else or are you ready to go home?” She really hoped that Jae wanted to do something else, she wasn't ready for the night to end yet. She would admit to herself that she liked Jae, a lot. “I don't want to go home yet, but where else is their to go?” She asked her. That was a good question. In this town your only options were food places, walmart, the mall, or the park. “Wanna go to Walmart?” She joked. “Sure.” Jae's answer surprised her, but she started the car and drove the five minutes to Walmart.

They walked through the aisles together, messing with things and making fun of people. Raven put on a fake beard and a green wig. “Do I look sexy?” She tried to ask with a straight face. They both burst out laughing. “Oh yeah, come here baby!” Jae laughed so hard she couldn't breathe. Raven took the mask off and they began walking through the electronic section, she casually slipped her arm around Jae's waist and glanced over at her. Jae smiled at her and put her arm around her before pointing to a movie she liked called Zombies Attack. Raven had never heard of it, but it wasn't hard to guess what it was about, how original. “What's it about?” She asks her. “These zombies take over New York City and start eating people. They all die in the end.” Jae told her. “Well thank you” Raven laughed “Now there's no need to see it” Jae responded by pulling her closer to her. “Come here, I have to tell you a secret” She told her. Why did she have to be so cute? “Okay, what is it?” Raven bent down and was completely thrown off guard when Jae kissed her. It was just one quick kiss before she pulled away and they smiled at each other. Raven decided that tonight was worth it. Jae was such a sweet, beautiful girl and they seemed to have a real connection between them. Nothing could ruin this night. Then she looked up and straight into the eyes of Sydney Harper.

“Hey what are you two doing?” Brad asked. They were holding hands. Raven suddenly felt sick to her stomach. Sydney looked so beautiful in just plain jeans and a t-shirt. She looked at the ground as Jae told them they'd gone to Fujiyamas and they discussed weither it was good or not. She looked up and Sydney was staring right at her. She felt herself staring to tear up and she knew she had to get out of there. She told them she'd be right back and made a break for the bathroom. She closed the stall door and shoved her finger down her throat, tears pouring down her cheeks at the same time. She knew she shouldn't do this, but she couldn't stop. It was an old habit that she thought she had conquered up until this very moment. She heard the door open, but there was no time to stop the puke from coming out. She finished and flushed the toilet, immediately feeling a little better. She wiped her eyes the best she could before opening the door. She came out and was horrified to see that it was Sydney who had came into the bathroom. She ignored her and dug through her purse until she found a wisp. She finished brushing her teeth and turned off the water. Sydney was staring at her.

“Why did you just puke?” She asked her. “My food must not have agreed with me or something, I'm fine.” Raven lied. Raven hoped that she would believe her, but from the way Sydney was looking at her, there was no way in hell. “What's your problem?” Sydney asked her rather rudely. Raven shook her head. She could not believe she was tearing herself up over this girl who just didn't give a shit. “You!” Raven exploded. “You are my fucking problem!” Fuck it she was just going to let it all out. Fuck not caring, fuck keeping her feelings to herself. Fuck it all. “Ever since that night I haven't been able to stop thinking about you. I lose sleep over it, I fuck around with every girl I see to replace the thing my heart longs for the most-love. You made me so happy in those few hours. You can't sit here and tell me it meant nothing! We were cuddling together for hours! I try so hard to forget about you, but your everywhere. Your at school, at Walmart, at party's, in my fucking head! No matter how hard I try to block it all out, you always fall back into my thoughts! It's driving me crazy and I can't fucking take it anymore. I just want to rip my own heart out and stomp on it! God why am I even bothering telling you all this? You don't give a shit!” Raven finished, breathing heavily from all the screaming she had just done.

She looked up at Sydney who looked near tears. She wondered why, her life wasn't being wasted pining over a girl who claims to be straight. “You seriously think I don't care? You think I haven't been thinking about it every moment for the past 3 months?” She said. “Yeah I do.” I tell her, trying to shove past her. She blocks my path and grabs my face, slamming me up against the wall and kissing me full force.