Everything but My Heart

I could feel Jake’s warmth from the small distance that was separating us. I held my breath as his face got close to mine on the pillow mere inches keeping me from roaming my hands all over his muscles. I bit my lip as we stared into each other’s eyes my cheeks going pink and he smirked. “Embry told me you had something to tell me.” I looked down at his muscles avoiding falling into his coffee eyes.

“Like?” He came a bit closer the bed shifting a little as he closed our space even more.

“I don’t know, something about me being your something.” I smiled as I saw his eyes glowing at me again.

“Oh, well there is something I need to tell you.” I saw his lips getting closer and I swallowed hard.

“What’s that?” I asked choked before I felt his warm soft lips push gently against mine. My head was spinning as my eyes closed feeling the butterflies erupt in their biggest frenzy yet the goose bumps were back. He pushed his lips a little harder against mine as they mashed so perfectly together. I felt him pull my body against his, my hands going straight to his chest and I was in even more heaven. I felt him smirk into our kiss before I felt this tongue brush my lower lip giving it a tender bite. I made a small semi-moan noise, if that’s even what you could call it, and his hands began to pull off my cardigan. It was a good thing when he threw it off cause I was getting hot.

His hand was running up and down my side gently making sure the goose bumps never left. His tongue was caressing mine as they mingled making our kiss deepen, our bodies couldn’t have gotten any closer and I felt myself, as well as Jake getting turned on. He flipped on top of me; his lower half perfectly placed between mine making the moment even hotter. My hands wrapped around his neck bringing him closer I never wanted it to end. He pulled away; my arms still wrapped around his neck his face still close. “Wow.” Was all I could manage to breath out his eyes still sparkling. “Jake?” I asked his hand still on my stomach I felt him playing with my belly button ring but his eyes were still on mine.

“You’re beautiful.” He brushed my rouge bangs out of my face that had gotten disheveled in our passion.

“Jake please,” His lips met mine again for a shorter but still adoring.

“I love you Tay.” He whispered on my lips when our kiss broke apart. The vibrations were intense as they chilled me.

“I love you too Jake.” I answered, I did and I had no idea how it had happened so fast he was off me and headed out the window running to the forest where I witnessed him phasing. I was left confused; my curls were riled as my heart dropped at the sight of his furry appearance slipping into the darkness. I had half a mind to follow him but I knew I would get lost or worst have another run in with a vampire. I laid back down smelling his pillow again feeling a bit like a stalker as I grabbed my cardigan from the ground and slipped my shoes back on, not even knowing when I took them off.

“Embry?” I cried after punching in his number and hearing three dial tones.

“Tay? Oh my god what’s wrong?” He was genuinely concerned. “I’ll be right there just stay put please.” I didn’t answer but I simply hung up slinking my way to the door waiting on the couch in the living room.

Embry showed up a few minutes later and I rushed to his chest as I continued to cry he pulled me closer his arms wrapping around me tightly. “What happened?” He asked a few minutes later aware that we were still in Jake’s driveway.

“He left.” I looked up to see the puzzled look on Embry’s face and he got to see the mascara stains running down mine. “Why?”

“Why what Tay?” He rubbed my back lovingly like a brother and best friend I considered him to be.

“Why do I love him? Why does it hurt so much?” I sniffled wiping my eyes carefully, “I just reconnected with him.”

“He didn’t tell you?” Embry looked cross and rigid. “Where did he go?”

“The forest.” I pointed behind his house.

“Phased?” He looked to see if he could find anything. I merely nodded my head remembering how his lips felt on mine. “It’s alright he’s just insane. Let’s go to Sam’s the other guys are there.”

Jake never showed up while I spent the day with the boys, who were admittedly a lot more fun. Even Sam who intimidated me slightly seeing his control over the boys. We were on the beach having a fire even though I knew it was late and I should have been heading home soon.

I laid in my bed I had avoided seeing everyone; Bella, my dad. Why would he tell me he loved me then run away? I hated boys, they were stupid and emotion toying creatures. The boys were holding a secret from me; I could read it in their eyes. What was Jake supposed to tell me? My thoughts robbed me from my sleep as I stared at the ceiling recalling my kiss with Jake that even then gave me goose bumps.

I was lost again, this time I was walking through a building that had many floors and thousands of doors. I was focused on a number, 204, 204, 204, 204, 204, 204, 204. It kept playing over and over in my head and it wouldn’t stop. 197, 199, I was looking on the wrong side, 200, 202. 204 my heart stopped as I hesitated outside the door I listened gently waiting to see if I could hear anyone.

It was silent as I turned the handle and pushed the door open to see the pitch-black room that appeared to have no one in it. “Taysia.” An eerie voice called to me from the darkness. I stayed in the doorway until I felt my arm being pulled into the darkness and the door was slammed behind me hard. The echo was the last thing I heard before a laugh filled the room, a laugh that filled my core with terror.

I would never forget that laugh.