Everything but My Heart

The room was dark; the pulled curtains shielded me from the morning’s luminous glow as I drank from the plastic pouch that contained my blood, it reminded me of Capri Sun, a drink Bella and I used to have all the time as kids. Soon. Soon I would be back in Forks that is if I even figured my way back and assuming that all things went well. I sure hoped nothing went wrong. I had three dozen, well one short of three dozen now, for my trip to Forks. That roughly gave me three weeks, providing I didn’t overdue my powers in which case I would have to drink more than one a day. One a day would still hold me though, or I really hoped I didn’t really take into account the entire running I’d do either. I was also completely depending on the fact that the Forks hospital would have blood I could take maybe with the help of Carlisle.

I sat there on the bed, let’s see it took us two days to get here and seven of those hours were spent on a plane, the rest was spent with Alice speeding faster than I had ever known a car to be able to go. I wanted to race a car someday; I wondered what was faster, vampire or vehicle?

The blood I drank wasn’t filled with the normal nutrients that human or animal blood contained, since it had never been mixed with the nutrients people obtain from food. Henceforth the reason why the synthetic blood runs through me so fast but I still thought it was worth it in the end. Part of me doubted that Forks, town with a population of 3,000 give or take would have the very expensive and somewhat rare synthetic food source. In that case I would have to steal from a bigger hospital. That wasn’t really in my morals but if I needed it, then I needed it.

I was still in Italy, entirely sure that the lady who I rented the room from thought I was some lost tourist with my broken Italian, age and odd appearances. At least I protected somewhat of my identity by wearing sunglasses, although she could have thought they were contacts but still no one has naturally silver eyes. Aro told me school was almost over, the only reason he cared was the stronger potential for food. That also gave me another reason to reach Forks quickly, I desperately wanted to see Bella graduate, something I would never be able to accomplish myself. Granted that was a little over a month away I still needed to figure out a plan to see it, I already knew I would have to use my powers. You can’t exactly reappear after being missing for several months, what would I even say? “Hey guys how’s it going? Yeah, I’m a vampire.” I didn’t really see that playing over too well in my mind. Not to mention it was just plain stupid.

I spent the next few hours of my day peeking out the window every few hours to check the sun’s position as well as try to see as much of a path that I could make away from the more populated areas. I had no clue where I would hop on a plane, maybe England? At least I would know what they were saying easily, but then again I was also pretty fluent in French. I decided it would be a toss up, which ever one got me there faster and had an entirely night time flight. I just hoped the people in the airports didn’t ask questions, but it’s not like I couldn’t use my powers to control that.

Was I even missed? I was laying down now. I mean two days before I sold my soul for my sister’s mortality she had pushed me off a cliff. And the guys, did they even think about me after I left? And then there was Jake; well at least I gave him another shot with Bella, which I prayed she would take. Not that I didn’t like Edward but the vampire lifestyle really isn’t one I would recommend to most. My life was pathetic. I wondered if Aro would come after me? Would he care I was gone? I had taken his blood and some of the Volturi’s huge money supply; I doubted they would even notice the several stacks of hundreds that I grabbed. Demetri, I had made him think that I loved him; I mean I did but I left before I could even let our immortal love a chance, deep down even with my heart that doesn’t beat I knew there was still something encased there for Jake. I would miss Aro, Alec, and Demetri the most they had become my new family. The only one I wouldn’t miss was Jane, and I knew she wouldn’t miss me either.

The bed was uncomfortable but then again as I groaned sweeping myself up. I wasn’t in a five star hotel, I would give it two and that was being very very generous. I shimmered as I peeked out the window for the last time before returning to the bed I had just complained about. My head flopped on the equally scratchy pillow that made sand paper feel like silk. You’d think once you were essentially dead these things wouldn’t matter but oh, they did. I tossed and turned for a while as I tried to let sleep come to me but I couldn’t help but thinking maybe I was making the wrong choice. Maybe I had more of a life than I thought by following the Volturi, a murderous one, but I had a much better chance of becoming my strongest with Aro’s guidance. I sighed while rolling on my opposite side a few beams of light surrounded the curtains edge. I would never know the best path until I chose one. I was too far to turn back now the only thing that laid ahead of me was Forks.