I Love CupCakes

Helens Interview 1.50

My phone bleeped at me. I looked down at the little white screen with blurry eyes. A friends was calling: Rachael. I hit accept and put it to my ear.

“Kate?”

“Yea?” Who else did she expect it to be?

“Gary just called me…”

“Shit.”

“Are you ok? He said you’re in the bathroom crying?”

“Yea.” I sigh. “I am.”

“Why?”

“It’s Gemma…”

“Really? Cuz that was over three years ago…” Thanks for pointing out the obvious Rach, like I didn’t know that.

“Yea I know, and Helen knows that I’m lying.”

“What about well?”

“Everything,” I cut in

“How?”

“No clue.”

“I found something when going through your stuff at your old flat.” What a weird way to change the subject. I honestly wondered about Rachel some days.

“What?”

“A letter…” She pauses. “It’s addressed to Gemma.”

“Oh.”

“I found it a few days ago but I didn’t really want to bring her up, after all these years.” I didn’t see why not. Did Rachel not realize that my book was about her?

“It’s the letter I never sent.”

“Why didn’t you send it?”

“There was no need, by the time I had written it, things had changed. Have you read it?”

“Yea…”
“Then you should know.”

“Know wha…” I shut my phone and turned it off so she couldn’t try to call again. I placed my hands back up on my face and continued my heartbreaking trip down fucking memory lane.

-------------Friday October 8th 2010--------------
It was about five pm and I sat down at my computer and picked up a pen and paper, and started to write.

Gemma,
You may hate me, dislike me, or feel sickened by me. But I think you should know how I feel. I mean really feel, inside and out. I still love you, in fact, I adore you, and I miss you terribly. You have blocked me on everything. Skype, Msn, Facebook and even Habbo. I can’t get hold of you, and in a way I think a letter is best for me. I still love you and I always will, I understand your decision to leave me and runaway because I know you are scarred and you do not want your heart to be broken again. I hope we do meet again and something does change and I do get to see you or hear you again.

I love you always,
Kate xx

Helens interview 1.55

The letter that I never sent…