Scream

Jimmy walked slowly across the freshly cut lawn of Huntington Beach High. He wasn’t looking forward to his first period of the day, which was photography. He loved photography, don’t get me wrong, but the teacher made art into a science, like you were supposed to understand different parts of one particular area. To Jimmy, art was art, and what looked good to him was perfectly fine. He knew what the lens was, and he knew how to take a simple picture; that’s all he wanted to do. He wanted to have his photography well-known, and he wanted to publish some of his pictures in this year book, seeing as it was his last year there.

Jimmy heard the sound of the last bell, indicating that he was late, but he made no motion to run like all the other students were: the ones that would wake up late intentionally, the ones that had hit snooze one too many times, and the ones that got stuck in traffic; usually the seniors. Although Jimmy was a senior, he refused to drive or take the bus that stopped at the corner of his street every morning. He chose to walk day in and day out, camera slung around his neck, just in case he saw the perfect scenery that he needed to take a snap-shot of.

As Jimmy was about to enter through one of the few ‘secret entrances’ of his high school, he heard a scream that seemed to come from a freshman, maybe a sophomore. He would usually pass this off as nothing, just because his friends, himself included, would usually bully the younger kids, sometimes even students of the same age, but this time was different. His group of friends would never go as far as to break something or to cause any serious damage, but they did enough to make some kids’ noses bleed, maybe loosen up a few teeth here and there, but never enough for anything internally to happen. That was what caused Jimmy to stop; the ear-splitting scream that now came from this unknown source. He sounded like he was in pain, and lot’s of it. Jimmy’s hand was on the door handle, but decided against opening it and stepped away, walking in the direction that he had heard the scream come from earlier.

He walked faster than he did when he first arrived at school, but he didn’t run. He made it very clear to everyone he knew; he ran for no man nor woman - his gym teacher being a woman. Perhaps that was why he was failing gym? Jimmy made a sharp turn around the back of the building, his eyes catching sight of what had emitted such a loud, nearly painful scream. He found a boy, no taller then his chest, lying seemingly unconscious as his attacker continuously pounded his stomach, face, and sides; whichever was in his reach at the time. Jimmy knew who that man was, and he went by the name of Anthony, star tackle, forward, and top wrestler on Huntington High’s football, basketball, and wrestling teams. How he kept up with everything, along with his schoolwork, Jimmy would never understand.

Anthony was known for one other thing as well, and that was his hatred towards gays and Atheists. He was friends with plenty of homophobic people, and you would never catch sight of gay or lesbian teenager in the same hallway as him. He wasn’t against beating up girls. If they were something he didn’t approve of, he would ‘beat some sense’ into them. All-together, he was no good, and whoever he was beating up was in serious trouble.

Jimmy took off into a quick sprint, throwing aside his running rule that he abided by nearly every second of every day. There was something different about this kid though, and that was how helpless and defenseless he looked. It made Jimmy want to protect him with every fiber in his body, and surprisingly, he didn’t even know this kid’s name yet. He felt a pang of sadness in his heart when he finally approached the two boys. Throwing his bag aside, but keeping his camera around his neck, he tackled Anthony to the ground, essentially straddling him.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?!” Jimmy yelled in his face, fist raised and ready to strike. The look of anger that was in Anthony’s eyes had since gone, and had now transferred into Jimmy’s blue orbs.

“Whoa man, I wasn’t doing anything. I was just protecting this school from a faggot,” Anthony almost sneered, but somehow managed to keep the hatred out of his voice. Although ten times stronger then Jimmy, Anthony knew that Jimmy used to take karate, but had dropped out of it after achieving his black belt; his ultimate goal. Anything Jimmy knew was plenty times more effective than anything he learned after four years of sports.

“Well how about I give you something else to do? Either get you ass to whatever fucking class you have right now, or I’ll beat you into a bigger pulp than you beat him into,” he, however, did sneer, using any and all strength he had in his body to keep him from breaking Anthony’s jock-like face in two.

“Alright, alright, fine. Whatever you say, dude. Just let me up, and I’ll leave.” Jimmy removed his body from the blonde’s and stood up, brushing himself off. After seeing that Anthony did in fact leave, Jimmy made his way over to the smaller boy, whom was now breathing in small pants and grasping at his stomach like his life depended on it… which, who knows, it just might’ve.

“Hey, are you okay?” Jimmy asked, kneeling down at the boy’s side. In response, Jimmy got a pitiful glare, which seemed to take up any strength the kid could muster. Jimmy chuckled slightly, but not out of humour.

“Okay, okay, I get it. Stupid question.” Jimmy looked over the damage that was done, and was actually really surprised. His nose seemed slightly crooked, which would explain why it was bleeding, a bruise in the shape of a fist was starting to form on his cheek, numerous other bruises covering his neck. He was frightened to even lift up the boy’s shirt, having seen him get beat there the most.

“Can I?” Jimmy asked, nodding his head in the direction of the shirt. He received a grunt in response, taking that as an okay as he slowly began to lift his shirt. In order to take the boy’s attention off of his actions, Jimmy decided to make small talk, or at least attempt it.

“So, what’s your name kid?” He was still lifting up the dark grey shirt, being careful not to touch the kid’s actual skin, afraid he would harm him even more then he already was.

“Johnny.” The kid replied, now known as Johnny, in an almost faint whisper.

Jimmy finished lifting up Johnny’s shirt, now checking over the total damage. It wasn’t as bad as he first imagined, but it was still pretty bad. Bruises of all colours littered his torso, but, to Jimmy, his body looked pretty damn amazing, even after the beating he took.

Quite frankly, Jimmy didn’t understand why he was thinking this way towards a boy he just met, but he was. Maybe it was the overwhelming urge he got to protect; to never let him be hurt again. Perhaps it was that one thought in the back of his head that had labeled Johnny as ‘cute’ the second he had gotten and up close look of the boy. Who knows, but either way, he was beginning to feel a pull of attraction towards this boy.

- ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ -

Days had passed, and Jimmy soon began to long for a conversation with this Johnny he had met a few days back. Aside from that, he couldn’t help but to think that maybe, just maybe, he was gay. Jimmy wanted to talk to someone about this, the questions that would fill his head just recently day in, and day out. Their group - Brian, Zacky, Matt, and Matt Wendt - weren’t homophobes, but he didn’t know how accepting they would be if they found out one of their best friends were gay. Only one thing would clear his mind from these questions; alcohol.

Jimmy called Brian up last night, Friday night, and asked if he could bring some alcohol down to their ‘spot’ on Saturday. Brian obliged, and Jimmy was stepping out of the shower now, throwing on old Slayer shirt along with some ratty old jeans. He sprayed some Axe on his shirt and neck, slung his camera around his neck, grabbed his cell phone from his bed where he had placed it before showering, and quickly hurried out the door before he could be questioned.

The cool night air hit his skin hard, and he was debating whether or not to turn around and grab a hoodie. He quickly put that thought aside, claiming it as being too much work, and was soon nearing the woods where his friends would gather nearly every weekend, or whenever they decided to cut school.

It didn’t take long for Jimmy’s lungs to be filled with the faint smell of marihuana and stale alcohol, most likely from past visits. Memories rushed to his head all at once, but once he spotted Brian sitting on a rock, all thoughts and memories were pushed aside, except for one; am I gay?

“Hey dude,” Brian said when Jimmy sat next to him. He was instantly given a 40, and took a drink from it, but not as much as he usually would. He wanted to stay semi-sober for this so he knew exactly what he did end up telling Brian. He didn’t invite anyone else to come hang out with the two of them for the simple fact that he didn’t know if he was going to end up telling Brian anything, and if he did, he didn’t want anyone else to be there in order to hear anything. He trusted Brian with his life, along with all of his other close friends, but Brian had been his friend the longest, so he was able to trust him somewhat more compared to the others.

“Hey,” Jimmy replied after a moments time, forgetting about Brian’s greeting. After a few minutes silence and quite a few gulps of alcohol on Brian’s part, and a few sips on Jimmy’s, Brian broke the silence.

“So, you gonna tell me what’s been bothering you while I’m sober, or are you gonna wait until I’m drunk?” Jimmy looked at Brian dumbfounded; like a deer in headlights. He was that obvious? He was trying his hardest to conceal any and all emotions from his friends, only trying to act happy and cheerful twenty-four-seven. Brian chuckled at his friends expression.

“We’ve been friends for how long now? Dude, I can read you like a fucking book,” Brian replied nonchalantly, taking a smaller sip from his bottle of beer. Jimmy took a minute to regain his composure, figuring out in his head what to do. Should he just come right out and say that he thinks he’s gay, or should he beat around the bush a little and ask his opinion on homosexuals? Jimmy took in a deep breath before deciding on what to say.

“Well, ‘um, I have a question for you.,” he began, trying to calm his thumping heart inside of his chest.

“Shoot.”

“Well, uh, what do you think about, ‘um.” Jimmy stopped what he was saying, now becoming afraid that Brian would catch on, knowing he would, and decide to beat him up, just like Anthony had Johnny a few days earlier. Although Jimmy was a black belt, Brian was also, having essentially the same skill level as Jimmy. With the way Jimmy’s nerves were, he wouldn’t be able to take on Brian right at that moment if his life depended on it. Brian turned his head to the side, giving his friend a look that told him to carry on.

“You know what, never mind. It’s not important,” Jimmy said, looking down at his beer and spinning the glass, causing the liquid inside to swirl around. Brian put down his 40, now not only curious, but also concerned about what his friend was going to say.

“What were you going to say?”

“Nothing, it’s not important.” Jimmy wanted to tell Brian, but he was worried about his well-being at that moment. Perhaps he could just tell him over the phone, maybe even over text message? Or at least in a place with more people, not just the two of them in a forest. He began to play with the camera strap that was around his neck; a nervous habit of his.

“Dude, seriously, what were you going to say?”

“Um, I was going to ask you what you thought about gay people,” Jimmy mumbled, hanging his head down, not wanting to see Brian’s reaction.

“What do you mean what do I think about them?”

“Like, I don’t know. I guess, are you homophobic?” Jimmy elaborated on his question, still speaking quietly and hanging his head down, now very interested in the light brown dirt that was scattered beneath him.

“Of course not. Why?” There was the question that Jimmy was hoping to avoid, but, there was no avoiding it now. Brian would push and prod until he got an answer; it’s just the way he is.

“Just because.”

“Jimmy?”

Jimmy held his head up, but avoided eye contact with his best friend. Brian didn’t have to ask the question he was going to ask next; he already knew the answer.

“Brian, I think I’m gay.” Jimmy stated, now looking Brian in the eyes dead-on. Brian smiled; a type of reassurance towards the elder friend. Time passed while the both of them sipped at their drinks, Brian drinking it slower after Jimmy’s revelation.

“Hey Jim?”

“Hm?” Jimmy asked, being brought out of his thoughts.

“What brought this on? Like, what made you gay? You were fucking some chicks brains out three weeks ago.” Jimmy smiled slightly at the memory which seemed ever-so distant now that he thought about he. Brian was correct; he was fucking some random girl from his Algebra I class three weeks ago. In all honesty, he couldn’t even remember her name anymore. A slight blush crept upon Jimmy’s cheeks at the thought of Johnny. Although he only seen him once, and that one time he was beaten and bloody, he still found Johnny incredibly attractive in every aspect. Even though the sun had set hours ago, Brian saw the blush that had formed upon Jimmy’s cheeks.

Brian smirked, chuckling loudly.

“Well look who’s got a crush.” Jimmy’s blush only grew stronger as he looked out into the night sky, and then over to his friend.

“Yeah, I guess I do have a crush,” he admitted after thinking about it for awhile. He wasn’t going to say he was in ‘love’, because he’s hardly even had a proper conversation with the boy, but, if even possible, Jimmy did feel a rather strong pull of affection towards Johnny; one much stronger than a simple crush.

- ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ -

Jimmy walked out of his last period at his usually sauntering pace, never once speeding up to avoid somebody, and never once slowing down. His old, beaten down back-pack was slung over his shoulder, his camera around his neck. The teachers had learned to accept him carrying his camera around everywhere, so they didn’t fuss about it anymore like they once had. They used to scold him continuously, telling him that it was a ‘distraction’ and was keeping him from doing his school work ‘properly’. Trust me, he didn’t do his school work properly intentionally, not because of a camera.

As Jimmy walked outside, out of the corner of his eye, he saw Johnny sitting against the building, reading a book.

‘A little unusual,’ Jimmy thought, now changing his direction towards the boy. He walked home anyways, and it wasn’t like his parents were actually expecting him. He would usually make a detour off at one of his friends house anyways. Either that, or he would stop to either look or take snap-shots of some beautiful looking scenery.

“Hey,” Jimmy said casually, throwing his bag down before his body followed it.

“Hey,” Johnny replied, seemingly more interested in the book than in outside conversation.

“Whatcha’ reading?” Jimmy asked. He was surprised at how calm he was acting, and talking, right now, as his heart had increased incredibly since he sat down.

Instead of answering Jimmy’s question, Johnny simply changed the way he was holding the book so that the title was now visible for Jimmy to see. The Catcher in the Rye, it read.

“Good book,” Jimmy stated, having read it himself. No, read is an understatement. More like memorized word from word would be more accurate.

Johnny set his book upside-down on his lap before looking up at Jimmy confusingly.

“You’ve read it before?” Johnny asked, surprised that Jimmy actually read. He expected him to be another jock even though he didn’t play any sports. Not at that school, at least. Johnny had spotted him playing basketball with a few of his friends before though, so he had instantly dubbed him as the type who didn’t read, had a freakishly low IQ, and didn’t do much of anything aside from hook-up with random girls. Now that he took a good look at Jimmy, he realized he looked nothing like a stereotype ‘jock’. He didn’t have the blond hair, but instead had a head-full of black hair that was spiked up in numerous directions. He didn’t wear the polo shirts and blue jeans, but instead he had on a pair of black jeans and what seemed to be and old Iron Maiden shirt. Johnny had spotted him in numerous kimono’s throughout the school year though. The only thing he did have that was ‘jock-like’, were his eyes. Bright, ocean blue eyes that Johnny was currently lost in.

“Read it? Try memorized it. I love that fucking book.” Jimmy smiled, throwing Johnny a goofy looking grin. Jimmy suddenly felt carefree, as if he could do or say anything around Johnny and it wouldn’t matter. Why, he didn’t know.

“Wow,” Johnny mumbled, shaking his head slightly. Jimmy raised an eyebrow at his response.

“What?”

“I didn’t exactly think you’d be the type who read,” Johnny said, stating exactly what he had been thinking.

Although slightly offended, Jimmy didn’t look too much into it.

“Eh, I like to read. Takes your mind off things. Let’s you journey to a whole other world.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.” Johnny said after thinking about it. In a sense, reading did take you to a whole different world; let’s you imagine and picture things you would’ve never thought imaginable.

Johnny looked up at Jimmy, observing him from head to toe. His eyes did a full once-over before going back to the camera that was resting directly over his heart.

“Why do you always carry that camera around? You had it when Anthony was beating me up, and now that I notice it, you wear it constantly.” This question was a rather easy one for Jimmy to answer, having been asked it countless times before.

“I wear it in case I need to capture the moment; in case I’m in the right place at the right time. So many things get looked over, but I stop and analyze every single object; every single thing that I cross paths with. If I see a flower leaning in the right direction, flowing with just the right amount of wind, I’ll take a picture of it, because I figure I’ll never see that one particular flower flowing with that specific amount of wind ever again. And if I miss it, then I’ll never get a chance to see it again, but if I take a picture, it’s there forever, and I can look at it whenever I feel like it; relive the moment, you could say.” Jimmy finished his little speech, awaiting Johnny’s reaction. Jimmy had been looking into Johnny’s eyes the whole time, never once breaking contact. Throughout the period of his rather poetic moment, their faces had gotten closer; either by the forces of gravity, or by the attraction they both felt towards each other. By now, the whole school had vacated the lot, leaving only Jimmy and Johnny on freshly mowed grass, a few other kids inside of the actual school building for various clubs and sports’ practices.

Jimmy’s hand moved down to his camera, his face leaning in slightly closer to Johnny’s.

“Johnny?”

“Hm?”

“I really want to kiss you right now.” Johnny smiled at this, having would’ve been too shy to actually kiss Jimmy himself.

“Well go ahead, nothing’s stopping you.” And with that, Jimmy leaned in, capturing Johnny’s lips in one of the most electrifying kisses Jimmy had ever felt. There was no questioning it now. Either Jimmy was gay, or he was only gay for Johnny, but either way, he was no longer questioning his sexuality. He definitely wasn’t straight, seeing that the shockwaves of pleasure that were being sent throughout his body were far too intense for that of a straight man to feel.

Jimmy grasped his camera, bringing it up so that it was facing the sides of both of their faces.

“Jimmy?” Johnny asked, breaking their kiss but still leaning his forehead against Jimmy’s.

“Hm?”

“What are you doing?” Johnny wondered, referring to the camera.

“I’m capturing the moment,” Jimmy smiled, leaning in, capturing Johnny’s lips in a second breathtaking kiss. Jimmy snapped the button on his camera, having now captured one of the greatest moments of his life. And the best thing? He would be able to relive it day in, and day out.