Soundtrack To Life

Amber-
I know what it feels like to be unwanted. I know what it feels like to have your heart ripped out again and again. I know what it feels like to set up one of your friends with a guy you like. I know what it feels like to be unsure of yourself. I know what it feels like to lose someone close or have them out of reach. The one thing that I have not experienced, yet, is love. As of right now it does not exsist for me. As of right now, it seems, that i do not exsist to anyone.

Everyday I wonder if any mircales are going to happen. Most of my days now are filled with confusion and hurt. I am a junior in high school and haven't found myself. The things around my life seem to change like the hands on a clock. I leanr to put my head down as I walk through the halls of school when I feel like I'm going to cry or breakdown right then. I leanr to shut people out when their easy chatter becomes unnecessary or uninteresting. The one thing that would make me believe that mircales happen is for things to turn around, which I highly believe.

Troy-
"Kayla, damnit! Turn your head this way. My parents are going to kill me if you runin the seats!"

This is the same old crap that always happens when Kayla and I go out on Saturdays. She ends up throwing up. Sometimes I start to wonder why I am with her or what I find good about her in times like these. She can be such a bitch! Yelling at random people and making them feel like crap for things that they like or care about. I remember when we first started going out. That was before I became the starting quarter back for the football team, and before she made the cheerleading team. Now, people describe her as a "class A" bitch.

I wonder what will happen to us if she pushes her limits on me. Lately she and I have had numorous fights about her behavior, she always thinks that what she is doing is right. I'm always helping the people, trying to make her change. It's times like these when I think that, is she really worth it?

Amber-

“I shot for the sky; I’m stuck on the ground. So why do I try, I know I’m going to fall down. I thought I could fly, so why did I drown? Never know why, its coming down.”

As I'm driving down the street to school I notice that the sun is unusually bright and the birds are singing. I thought that would be a sign for a better day. Taking a breath I pulled into my parking space. It's odd because I'm squeezed between two guys from the football team, Troy Perkins and Tyler Gerson. Both are very good looking and unfortuanally, taken and best friends. They are part of the popular group in school. Troy's girlfriend is the leader. Her name is Kayla and she is "the bitch" of the school. Kayla and Tyler's girlfriend are best friends as well so they double a lot of the time.

As I'm pulling up Kayla appears out of nowhere. I didn't see her until I was almost five inches from hitting her. She screamed of coarse, throwing things out of proportion. She screamed names at me that I couldn't hear because of my loud music that was playing. "Turn that shit down!" she yelled. I adjusted the volume and found an old piece of paper that I could doodle on until the bell rang for school to start.

Looking up I saw Troy and Kayla talking. She looked like Barbie, with her long blond hair and blue eyes, talking to her Ken, except for the fact the Troy looked far to pissed and embarrased to play the roll.

Troy-

"When you see my face, I hope it gives you hell. When you walk my way, I hope it give up hell!"

I don’t understand why Kayla always has to be so cruel to people. I mean, Amber was truly a nice person, even though she is a bit odd. I have been going to school with Amber since fifth grade. She was always quiet and had an ipod on her. She loved music and writing stories, songs, and poems. They were good too. I know that her mom died in a terrible car accident a few years ago, I don’t think that she’s gotten over it. But I had to put my foot down on Kayla always running her mouth on the cloths people wear or the music that they listen to. Hasn’t she heard? People always don’t have to like the same things as Kayla likes?

As I look from Tyler to Amber I see that she is paying no attention to Kayla. Why should she care what Kayla thinks? From the last time I spoke with Kayla it seemed that she was doing fine. She was going to admit some of her poems and stories to a journalism agency and she had some friends that she spent her time with and she was so smart, she even tutored me in Chemistry. She doesn’t get in any ones way, or talk bad about any one. The one thing I do notice is that she sometimes looks unhappy. I wish I knew what it was so I can help her.