Captain Diapers

Mommy would tell us that the process of birth is longer than it seems. You don’t go to the hospital and expect the baby to be born within a couple of hours and a few pushes. When doctors and nurses come in and out of the room every 30 minutes, wondering when am I able to push, you start getting restless. Eventually, your baby will be too.

I’ve been in the hospital for nearly six hours now and no sign of pushing yet. They said I only dilated 6 centimeters, which is a good sign but have to wait until it’s 10 centimeters to push. Our families were waiting in the waiting room, as Jonathan stayed with me. He’s been keeping me entertained, telling me stories about pranks on the road to Patrick deciding to don the Big Bird costume now instead of later. Anything out of his mouth was better than thinking about the pain and the anticipation.

“How are you feeling, babe?” He asked as he placed a wet rag on my forehead.

“How am I feeling? How am I feeling?!” I started to yell and rant at him. “Oh I’ll tell you how am I feeling, Jonathan Toews. I’m peachy. Fucking peachy! I’ve been here for 6 fucking hours in pain and all you can ask how am I feeling? If you didn’t knock me up back in Mackinac Island, this would’ve never happen!”

“I take it as you’re fine. Maybe you should--”

“Should what, Jonathan? Take an epidural? My mother, God bless her soul, gave birth to the three of us without one. Now that’s one tough cookie if you ask me. I’m perfectly content of going through this without one!” I started to relax as I got over yet another contraction. “This is like a funny April Fool’s joke. Oh wait, today is April Fool’s Day. Our son is going to be born on April Fool’s Day!” I was continuing my rant when I see Patrick come into the room, wearing a Big Bird costume. “Okay… this is a fucking nightmare. I woke up this morning, expecting to have a great day at our house with a few female friends and I end up in a hospital with all these fucking wires, on-going cramps, and Big Bird!”

“Patrick, she’s not ready to give birth yet.” Jonathan said as he continued to wipe my forehead with that wet rag. “She’s just antsy.”

“I’m preparing to welcome Cam into the world.” Patrick started to do a Big Bird dance in the room which I wasn’t impressed.

“You’re going to make him want to go back in me!” I took the rag and threw it at him. “Get out!” I saw Patrick walk out of the room, his head down from being thrown out by an angry pregnant woman. “God, I hate this. I hate this pain! I hate you! You made me ugly and fat! God, I’m so scared.”

“Hey, you’re anything but ugly or fat.” Jonathan kissed my forehead as I felt like crying. “I know you’re in a lot of pain but you can do this.”

“What if I can’t? It hurts so much.”

“You can. You just said your mother gave birth to you, Mally, and Skylar without an epidural. You’re a lot stronger than you think, Candace.”

“Stay with me, Johnny.”

“Til the end.” He gave me a hug as I started to relax once again in his arms.

The next few hours went by slowly as I took a nap. The nurse checked on me to see if I dilated since they last check and said I was getting close but haven’t reach the full 10 centimeters. Despite everything, Jonathan stayed by my side. He helped me focus on my breathing and relax.

Shortly after midnight, the doctor checked if I was ready. My contractions were becoming more intense and felt the urge to push. Once she gave me the nod that I was fully dilated, I was in position to push. Jonathan urged me on as I started to push down. The pain was unbearable as I felt that my body is being stretched and ripped into two. For years I’ve been cheering for the team to win but right now Jonathan became the head cheerleader as he pushes me on. Tears started to form from my eyes as the doctor told me the head is out. I know I have one big push to go but still felt scared to do it.

“You can do it, Candace.” Jonathan whispered in my ear as I was prepared for my next push. “Cam’s counting on you.”

I pushed as much as I can until the doctor stopped me so he can pull him out. There was silence for a couple of seconds until I heard a cry. When I looked up, I see the doctor placing Cam on my chest as I held him. The tears I was holding back finally fell as I held our little boy. I look up and see Jonathan crying as Cam relaxed in my arms. They asked Jonathan to cut the cord as I started to relax on the bed.

“You’re amazing.” He leaned down to kiss me; our tears were mixed in between them. “I knew you can do it. I love you, babe.”

“We’re a family now… you, me, and Cam.” The nurse place Cam back in my arms as we look at each other. He had my eyes and mouth while having Jonathan’s nose. “Welcome to the world, Camden Glenn Toews. We’re going to love you forever.”

6 pounds, 9 ounces, and 20 inches of Cam and he’s ours to keep.