Detention With Severus Snape

* ~ February 8 ~ *

Oi. My back is killing me. Anyway... I had a task or two to fulfill this past week. After Professor Snape had calmed down (and returned my lunchbox, the packed lunch eaten) the SSS decided to kick it up a notch and add another task. "Come into the Great Hall late for dinner, and hold up a bottle of sexual lubricant, telling Snape that he dropped it." Which came from Luna.

"Where am I going to get sexual lubricant?" I asked, exasperated. Everyone just glared at me until I gave in. "Fine, I may just happen to have some lying about, just in case. But you owe me a new bottle!" Colin seemed very pleased, for some reason.

It was a very boring day. Let's see... There was double Herbology, with yet another new teacher, then lunch, during which I fetched my KY warming lubricant, then History of Magic. After that, I met Colin in the library and we played Dominatrix Librarian, and put some of that lubricant to good use. (Let's just say it involved putting things in a certain party's rear end, and that the rear end involved did not belong to me.)

Then it was time for dinner. I was late, as planned (I needed to get cleaned up, anyway. Dominatrix Librarian is a very messy game.) I knew I had to give a convincing act. So, with the "lotion" firmly in hand, I burst heroically through the doors to the Great Hall.

"Professor!" I cried, jogging up to the high table. "You dropped this!" I held up the bottle of KY warming lubricant, basking in the warm glow his increasingly red face was radiating. I then placed it on the table in front of him, gave him a winning smile, and took a seat at the Ravenclaw table. It wasn't long before he had prowled over to me and dragged me to my feet.

"What is the meaning of this!" he hissed, obviously embarrassed.

"I thought you would know, Professor!" I exclaimed loudly. "Don't you need it to play Dominatrix Librarian?" Without another word, he stormed out of the room. "Hm. Oh well." Dinner was nice. Though I could already tell that Colin was getting jealous. Again. And sure enough, not five minutes after I'd left, he caught up with me.

"How could you, Nadia? Dominatrix Librarian is our game!" I rolled my eyes.

"Colin, don't be such a menopausal wimp."

"I'm not a menopausal wimp! Honestly, sometimes I think you treat Snape better than you treat me!"

"Listen, you come back and discuss this with me once your cycle's through. Alright?"

"Jesus, can't you stop being such a bitch?"

"Now, Colin. Don't go dragging Jesus into this."

"I'm serious!" With a frustrated sigh, I stopped walking for a moment so as to better make my point.

"Colin. Let's just think about this for a moment. You are jealous of Professor Snape. Just... Let that sit with you for a bit." He stared back a me, blinking.

"...I'm not jealous of Snape," he finally grumbled, crossing his arms.

"You are." I offered him a kiss as a peace offering. "So stop it."

"Hmph."

"You know, you're really cute when you're sullen." I could see that he was intrigued. "Let's go play." Heheh.

It was two days before Ginny came up with another task. "Make a list of kinky things you would do to Snape and make sure he finds it."

"Can do!" Except, I didn't really do it. I didn't feel like it! It took me until yesterday to get the task done, really. And that was mostly because yesterday was potions class.

I was bored - really bored. So, to amuse myself, I decided to finally get the task done. I took out a piece of paper and wrote down all the naughty things I would like to do to the dear Professor. Of course, I probably should have paid more attention to my surroundings, but he was supposed to see the list eventually, anyway...

Professor Snape, having been roaming the aisles to check the progress of the students, snatched the paper away from me, sneering. "What have we here?" he asked quietly, eyes glittering. "A love note to Mr. Creevey?"

"Er... Not quite..."

"Perhaps the rest of the class would like to hear it?" Oh, this was too good.

"...If you insist," I sighed, watching him skim over the paper. His eyes went round and his cheeks suddenly had a whole lot of color in them.

"On second thought, I think not."

"I had a feeling."

"Thirty points from Ravenclaw. I'm contacting your parents about this." I blinked.

"And that's a threat?" Pursing his lips, he whirled around and made his way back to his desk, from which he continued the lesson. For the rest of the class, whenever he looked at me I leaned my head on my hands, sighed longingly, and made goofy faces. Just for fun. And oh, how fun it was.

After classes, I met Luna and Ginny in the courtyard, where we proceeded to scheme about the task I would perform for Valentine's Day. Meanwhile, Colin was apparently making plans of his own. I'll kill him. It didn't take long for a few possible tasks to come up. "You could ask him to be your Valentine," Ginny suggested.

"Or force him," Luna added.

"And then I could act all possessive and jealous, like Colin," I mused. "Only more aggressive."

"Yes!" Ginny agreed. "And really act like he's your Valentine. Slip him little love notes all day, shower him with candied gifts, mouth 'I love you' at him. Things like that."

"Alright, alright," I sighed.

"And invite him to the Astronomy Tower," Luna added.

"Oh, yes!" Ginny cried. "That's perfect!"

"What's perfect?" That would be Colin approaching, and being very out on the loop.

"Don't tell him anything," she hissed to me.

"The next task," I said, trying to think of a way to break it to Colin that I was going to be Snape's Valentine without him getting jealous. And failing. "Ummm... Let's go try out that edible body paint!" So, I dragged off a very happy looking Colin. Damn, I love submissive men.