Taion

That night, I'd woke up with night terrors. It didn't suprise me; I hadn't had one for weeks now. It had only been a matter of time. Glancing at the clock, it was four in the morning and I had hours before I had to get ready for school again. At first, I tried to go back to sleep, I really did, but I gave up after five minutes of staring into space.

I got up. 

The Barakat's house was home. For the time, Alex had said, until I can find an apartment nearby. And being home, I knew exactly what I could do without waking any of the residence up four in the morning as well. That would be a very limited nothing. Instead, I slipped on a pair of skinnys, my converses, and a old band tee and take quite steps down the hall, out to the garage.  

The sky is navy. Dark ink spilled onto a white canvas where some one had sprinkled silver sparkles. It has been a long time since I'd been able to see stars. 

And then....

"Hey, kid. Why are you up?" 

Tearing my eyes away from the stars, I pear into the darkened garage. There's a figure with bed head standing there, clutching a glass to his chest, and wide eyes gleaming in the moonlight. I can tell by the lanky frame that it's Jack. "You aren't going all crazed on us again, are you? Like the running away shit, 'cause we don't need another repeat of that."

I laugh and shake my head, slipping to the floor and beckoning him over to me. He complies. "I couldn't sleep. Nightmares. Look, you can see the stars here."

He smiles, but he's not himself. He looks troubled and the fact that he hasn't said anything sexual or childish in the last five seconds confuses me. "Uh huh. And there's," He points, "The big dipper. And the little one. Ooh, and Hercules."  

"Oh, yeah. And then there's the one-  what's its name? -with the dog." 

He nods stiffly and silence laps over us, except an occasional clink of ice cubes against the glass. Then, "What do you really dream about?"

He's blurted it out so quickly that it takes me a few seconds to respond with a shocked, "What?"

"What. Do. You. Dream. Of." He makes sure each word is clear and composed.

I was baffled, completely clueless and naive and how did I not see this moment coming?  How did I think they'd never ask me this? Why did I believe they'd ignore my odd behaviors and not question me anymore on my past than they already knew? Because I trusted them. That's why. "No."

Jack doesn't say anything for a while. He takes another sip of water and looks back at the sky. His eyes reflect the skies and foreign constellations. "Zack told us about the scar. After he told us about the smoking incident." My cheeks flush; Alex had confessed to me earlier that Zack had told him about the smoking, but the scar? I wasn't aware of that. "Zack begged 'Lex for an hour not to go off on you with the smoking. You owe him a thanks."

"Where is he?"

Jack shrugges. "He left shortly after you feel asleep. His apartment, I bet." Another awkward pause filled in with clinking ice. A falling star grabs both of our attention, but only momentarily. "You told him about the scar." He holds up his hands innocently. "Not that I mind or anything -I'm just glad your talking about it, but," He draws out that word. And oh, he's going to say something stupid or controversial or blunt. "But, we all see the way you look at him."

Shit. I did not expect this. I open my mouth, but Jack is dead set on talking. "You adore him, but you've got to realize: you're sixteen, Envy. Zack is in his twenties."

My cheeks are burning again, and I deny it all while staring straight at him. "I don't adore Zack. He's just a friend. Not even that, actually. He's basically another parent. He's your friend-"

"We both know you're lying." He's staring right back at me, and damn it, he knows. I tear my eyes away. 

"I-" My voice cracks. "It's nothing. I don't like him. He's just-"

"Stop lying for one second, Envy. Fuck." He laughs, but it's stressed and tired.

"Does Alex know?"

"If he didn't, he does now. You did kiss his cheek today. Er, yesterday."

"And Rian?"

"He's the one that told me he thought something was up." I'm quiet and I feel like crying. It's been a long time since I've cried and just the pressure of everything building up makes me want to run away. "Zack's encouraging the whole thing, obviously, but he's really oblivious, Phoenix. He thinks you're just joking around. You can't keep dragging him around like this, but I think you grasp what I'm saying here."

I blink, rub my eyes, and nod. "Yeah. Stay away from him and keep my distance."

He nods, but he has this apologetic look on his face. "He isn't gay, Envy, but he's easily swayed. Don't do anything that'll take advantage of him."

I look at him, wide eyed. Me? Take advantage of Zack? "This is Zack's friend Jack talking, isn't it? This is the Jack before I was introduced to your lives." 

He frowns. "No, this is the Jack that's torn between one of his best friends and his ward." I didn't correct him. Didn't say, Alex's ward, because I knew they'd all adopted me figuratively speaking. "I just don't want something to happen between you two and it get all awkward  ."

"So..." I suck in a breath. "Your against it?"

"Oh, yeah." He laughs. "Just...don't...k-keep your distance, okay? Keep your distance."

"Okay." I agree, only thinking how hard that would be. Tomorrow is Friday, but the next two weeks, Zack is in charge of picking me up Tuesdays and Wednesdays. 

"Good. Let's go play some X-Box." 

I grin. This was the Jack I liked. The one that cleared up awkwardness with a doofy grin and requests of gaming, even though he knows he'll loose. He stands, helps me up, and we enter the house at four twenty seven. By four thirty five, everyone is awake by his profantic screams while dodging my bullets.