Little White Church

I watched as Joe and Denise got up for the Mother/Son dance. Just before them, I had to watch Alyssa and her dad dance for the Father/Daughter dance.

It made me want a wedding of my own.

“Hey,” Alyssa said, sitting down in the chair next to me. Her poofy wedding dress delayed her from sitting down right away, but after a moment’s adjustment, she plopped down into the chair.

“Hey,” I said, frowning a little as I took a sip of champagne from the glass that was sitting on the table, while continuing to watch Joe and Denise. I then turned my attention to her.

“So... how much longer are you going to wait?” She asked, getting straight to the point.

“What?” I questioned, then stated, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh, please,” she stated, in all seriousness. “Catherine, I saw the sad look on your face when I was just dancing with my dad-”

“I’ve never experienced a father-daughter dance before,” I defended.

“Please, your dad is right over there,” she said, motioning to where my dad was talking with my mom on the opposite side of the room. “You could have danced with him when everyone else was announced to join-”

“Oh, whatever, we both know Hilary’s his favorite daughter,” I said, referring to my older sister. They seemed to have a tighter bond than he and I did. They always say the youngest of the family gets away with everything, but in our family, there’s an exception. Instead, the oldest gets away with everything, and she’s my father’s favorite. My mom has the decency to say she loves us both equally. My dad says that too, don’t get me wrong, but he always seemed to show more favoritism toward her. I always felt like I came in second compared to her with our dad. Ergo, an example of that being him dancing with her for the Father/Daughter dance that just took place. “They danced for that; he didn’t even bother with me.”

“Oh, Catherine, don’t be like that. You know that’s not true,” she sympathized, but I shook my head. She sighed, but moved past it, “Anyways, you have the same look on your face now that Joe and Denise are dancing, and not to mention you looked gloomy during the whole ceremony...”

“Alyssa, what’s your point?” I asked, trying to get her to the point already.

“Well, honey, it’s kind of obvious that you want to get married,” she said. “So why don’t you go out there and find someone?”

“What are you talking about?” I asked. “I’m perfectly happy with Nick.” She made a face, probably hoping I wouldn’t see it, but the thing was... I did.

“Catherine, you and Nick have been together for five years,” she pointed out. “Joe and I have been together for three, and we were just married. Kevin and Danielle were together for only two before they got married. Are you seeing what I’m getting at here?”

“Nick wants to settle down,” I defended. “He just wants to... wait a little longer to do so.”

“Has he actually told you that?” She asked me, raising an eyebrow. I hesitated before answering.

“Well... no. Not exactly,” I answered. “But still... I’m sure he’ll want to eventually. Would be still be with me if he didn’t?”

“Catherine...” she trailed off.

“You can’t answer that, can you?” I questioned unbelievably. She sighed.

“I’m sorry. It’s just...” she started, then sighed yet again. “Look, it’s just that I know that Nick’s afraid of commitment. Joe told me that, and I even heard Kevin mention it once. I just... don’t want to see you get hurt.”

“I don’t get what you mean.”

“It’s just... the commitment issue. You obviously want to settle down soon, and I don’t want to see you upset if Nick still hasn’t worked up the nerve to move to the next level,” she explained. She did have a point.

I didn’t know what I was going to do.

>>------------------------------------------------------------>>

I decided to test out Alyssa’s theory, by asking Nick if I could speak to him, in private. Well, not exactly private, considering it was a wedding reception and people were practically everywhere, but at least somewhere with less people. So, we headed outside.

“Heck of a wedding, huh?” He asked me, as soon as we got outside. I smiled a little, pausing before walking into the grass. I took off my bridesmaid heels, and stepped into the grass; feeling the cool ground beneath my feet, a quite relaxing feeling in comparison to the heels. “Joe and Alyssa... really went all-out.”

“Yeah,” I agreed, not really knowing what else to say to him other than what I wanted to bring up. “They did.”

In all the time I’ve known Nick, we’ve never once had an awkward conversation. But I guess everything has its firsts, and that first... would by this moment.

He began mumbling the lyrics to a song, and he smiled a little when I looked at him.

“Remember the date?” He asked me, being vague. I squinted at him.

“That’s a bit... unclear Nick. We’ve been on a lot of dates. Maybe you should be more specific,” I stated, making myself angry. So many dates. More than Joe with Alyssa and Kevin with Danielle before they got married.

“You know, when we went to Oliver’s together for the first time, and then we got up and danced together, making complete fools of ourselves?” I laughed, and nodded. I did remember that date. We made fools of ourselves because neither one os us knew how to slow dance, as strange as that may seem. We kept stepping on each others’ feet. Oliver’s was, and would always will be, a great place and restaurant. A little cheesy for a date, but oh well.

Nick continued, “And then remember how I was humming that same song that I was just now mumbling, so you wouldn’t be as embarrassed? That’s what made me bring it up.”

“We have a lot of good memories,” I mentioned. I decided now was as good a time as any to bring up my thoughts. “Nick, what exactly... is this between us?”

“What do you mean?” He asked. I could feel his hand tense as it gripped mine.

“I mean, do you consider this... a commitment?” I clarified. He let go of my hand completely then, which caused me to start to panic. “I mean, I know we’re not married yet. But I was just curious as to where you saw us going...”

“Why would you even ask that?” He questioned, since I had trailed off. “I mean, what does this have to do with bringing up the date?”

“It doesn’t,” I admitted, “or, well... I guess it kind of does. It’s just... I was talking with Alyssa inside, and she did bring up a good point of how we’ve been together a while. And I mean, a long while-”

“So?” He interrupted, looking at me as if I’d gone insane. “What does it matter is we’ve been together a while, and haven’t gotten married yet? Doing that is probably better, so we spend more time together before we... settle down...”

My stomach dropped at the way he paused at the ending. I didn’t want Alyssa to be right, but it was beginning to sound like she was. I slowly started to back away from him, the grass blades now feeling like razors under my feet.

“What exactly is wrong with the idea of settling down? You’re not for it, are you?” I questioned. I then come to a realization, “or you’re not for commitment... with me.”

He hesitated, before saying, “Catherine... baby...”

“No. No more calling me baby,” I said. “If... why have you been with me this whole time then if you couldn’t at least... picture the idea of us ‘settling down’?” I put air quotes around those last two words, just for affect. He frowned.

“I... I don’t know what to say to that,” he said, after a couple of minutes of silence. I shrugged.

“What does it matter?” I questioned sarcastically. “Why did... anything in this relationship matter? If it wasn’t obvious, we’re over.”

I then walked away from him. Back into the building, to sulk through the rest of the reception.

>>------------------------------------------------------------>>

*One Month Later*

“He’s really sorry, you know,” Alyssa stated, as we were sitting across from each other on the couch, in her and Joe’s new house. They had just gotten back from their honeymoon last week, and purchased the house a little bit before the wedding, but... they were just now getting moved in. This was normal considering it was Alyssa and Joe, after all.

“Who is?” I questioned, not giving it a second thought. I was helping her unpack the antiques her grandmother had given to her as an early wedding gift.

“Nick,” she said, analyzing my reaction. I did nothing but shrug. She continued, “But anyways, it turns out I was wrong about him-”

“What do you mean?” I interrupted.

“Well, according to Joe, Nick was going to propose to you,” she stated. “He had already bought the ring and everything. He just never had the chance to ask, before you two... you know... broke up. He just told Joe after we got back, and Joe just told me the other night.”

“What?!” I questioned in shock, almost dropping the antique plate I had been unwrapping. Luckily, I didn’t. “You have to be kidding. The night of the reception I asked him about our future, and he seemed scared shitless at even the thought of commitment...”

“Wait a minute,” she stopped me. “Is that the reason you two broke up? You actually followed what I said?”

“Well, yeah. Why wouldn’t of I?” I asked, wide eyed. She did one of the worst things after I did: she actually laughed.

“Oh, Catherine. I was at least half-drunk that night when I told you that. I’m one of the worst two people to take advice from when I’m even just semi-drunk. The first one being my mom, and then my sister coming in a rough third,” she laughed. When this was not at all funny to me.

“You didn’t seem drunk,” I defended. “And besides, when I did ask him about it, he hesitated. If he was sure about it, he would’ve answered me right away.”

“Who in the hell do you know that is absolutely sure on anything? Besides something someone has thought through or someone’s belief of something? This especially something as big as commitment?” She questioned, sounding rhetoric. She did have a point. “Look Catherine, you probably just spooked him. And he was probably going to ask you to marry him soon, and he was probably just confused or angry thinking that you found out. You need to think of this from his perspective, because Joe told me that Nick told him he’s had the ring for a few months.”

“Really?” I squeaked out, feeling myself get upset. Feeling that I didn’t give Nick a chance.

“Aw, don’t get upset,” she sympathized. “Just... go get him back. You two have been together five years, and still have yet to get married. If you break up permanently, well... there sure as hell isn’t any hope for the rest of us.”

“Thanks,” I said meekly, smiling a little at her choice of words.

“Look, I’ve got the unpacking from here, just... go,” she ushered, waving her hands.

With one final farewell, I was off to see Nick.

>>---------------------------------------------------------------------->>

I was a little anxious as I knocked on the door, and little nerved about the other car in the driveway. Other than that, I just couldn’t wait to see him again.

The door opened, and I was greeted by someone who I wasn’t expecting.

“Hi,” the girl said cheerfully, even adding a little wave for affect. I felt a little intimidated, feeling self-conscious seeing as this girl was a lot prettier than I was. I smiled anyway, though.

“Hi. Um... is Nick here? Maybe I came to the wrong place...” I trailed off. I knew all of Nick’s friends, but I didn’t remember this girl. And I also knew this was Nick’s place, but seeing as I didn’t know the girl, I needed to make sure he hadn’t moved or something.

“Yeah, he’s here. Nick!” She called, turning her head to yell into the house. It took a moment before he appeared.

“Catherine... what are you doing here?” He asked. The girl stepped out of the way so he was now in front of me.

“Um... I... I think I should go. This seems like a bad time,” I said quickly, before walking away quickly as well. I could hear him quickly following behind me.

“No. No, no, no, no...” he kept repeating, until he finally caught my arm. “She isn’t... what you think. Samantha is just a friend of mine. We met when we were in Les Mes together.”

I looked into his eyes. “Really?”

“Yes,” he answered immediately. “Really.”

I smiled, and he did too. I then kissed him, taking us both by surprise. But soon enough he started kissing back, before pulling away.

“Wait here,” he stated, motioning with his hands. I agreed, and he headed inside. About two minutes later, he returned, holding a little box in this hand that he didn’t have before. He got down on one knee in front of me.

“I know I should’ve done this sooner, considering it would have made it all a lot easier, but... I decided to wait,” he rambled, and I smiled a little at his cuteness. “Catherine, I love you. I always have and always will. I’m sorry I hesitated when you asked me if I saw us committed in the future, but the truth was... it reminded me that I bought you the ring and it just scared me... put into perspective to me, because it showed that you were ready and it made me want to double check if I really was too. So, the point is... I know now, for sure, that I want to marry you Catherine. So now, the question is... do you still want to marry me?”

I decided to hesitate, just like he had done to me. But then after a moment, I happily answered, “Yes!”

He slowly took the ring out of the opened box, and put in on my left ring finger. Then he put his arms around my waist and happily lifted me up, so that my legs went around his torso. I leaned my forehead against his.

“Let’s get married... in a little white church,” he suggested, smiling while I laughed at the classic location.

“Yeah,” I agreed, “let’s.” I then placed my lips on his in a sweet kiss, knowing there would be many more in our life together after that one.

'Til you take me down (take me down),
You better take me down (take me down),
Take me down to the little white church,
Take me down (take me down) Take me down (take me down),
Take me down to the little white church,
Take me down...