My Beloved Monster
032
I woke up early so I could take my time getting ready. Chaz's bed was untouched so I assumed he had a good night out and made some 'new friends'.
I took a soothing hot shower and blow-dried my hair. I went over to my suitcase and picked out appropriate clothes for the meeting.
I took the metro and got off at the stop closest to the shore. As I walked up the steps to the city's hall, I ignored the pictures that were taken of me.
I followed the front desk's directions through a maze of hallways until I reached two large wooden doors. I knocked on the door before I was told to enter. I shut the door quietly behind me and tried to steady my breathing as I made my way into the center of the large room.
Several chairs were placed in front of a long oak desk, where five people were seated behind.
"Miss Senta, I am sure you are wondering why we have requested your presence?" The older man in the center spoke up respectfully in German. I nodded my head and head gestured to a chair. "Please have a seat."
I did as he told and sat down quietly. I figured since I haven't the faintest idea why I was here, I would let them be the ones to speak first.
"As stated in the letter, we are here to discuss your participation." He said breaking the silence.
"Yes, I have read the letter." I nodded my head and laid my hands in my lap hopefully not making my nervousness too noticeable.
"Well, considering your current health condition, in both yours and our benefit, it seems that it would be best if you were disqualified." He continued.
Disqualified? It just echoed throughout my head.
My stomach dropped, "Pardon? Health condition?"
The woman on his left spoke up, "Well, we wouldn't want anything to happen to you or your unborn child. Figure skating may not be the most dangerous sport, but accidents do happen."
"Ch-child?" My eyes widened.
"Yes, it was stated on the forms sent to us from your physician." She said not seeing the utter confusion in my face.
"We will take your name off the programs and have them reprinted." The center man took control once more. "We don't even have to announce it as a disqualification."
Disqualified?
"We can make up a story. You have health issues or a family matter that must be attend to and you could not avoid it."
Disqualified?
"You could leave the country quietly." Another woman spoke up. "Though we would have to find some other form of transportation. Until, Finnair ends their strike."
Disqualified?
"But, how far along am I?" I asked as soon as my throat wasn't so dry.
"It states at least eight weeks." The man in the center read off of my transcript. "Didn't you know?"
"No. But, eight weeks, I could still be eligible? No harm should come to me or the unborn child." I asked hopeful.
"That we will have to discuss. There is your health concern as well as our reputation." Another man stated.
"Of course." I nodded my head slightly, still completely numb by everything. "But, you must understand how hard I have worked in order to skate for my country this week. I just cannot turn back now."
"We understand this." The older woman who seemed to be second in command said.
"We will have to discuss this as I have mention earlier. We will contact you no later than the end of this weekend." The center man ended the meeting.
I nodded. "Thank you for your time."
The clicking of my heels against the floor and the occasional cough were the only sounds made as I walked the long distance to the door.
I closed the door behind me and took a deep breath. I slid down against the wall and shut my eyes. This was just too much for me to handle at the moment.
I leaned my head back and took another deep breath. I could not even cry or let on that anything was wrong because right out side the front doors paparazzi was awaiting me.
I just couldn't think about this now. I took my sunglasses out of my clutch purse and prepared to put them on once I reached outside.
I smiled, like when I had first arrived at city hall, to the cameras and continued my way back to the hotel.
I ran to catch the train before it left. That was probably one of the longest rides for me ever. I looked out the window and tried to concentrate on anything but the meeting I had just left.
I ran down the halls to my room ignoring Chaz and Loring calls as I ran pass them. I was loosing the battle with my emotions as my nose burned and the tears brimmed. And I didn't want the public to know my personal life. I have always been able to separate the two, but the last month it's been more difficult to do so.
I locked myself in the bathroom knowing that Loring and Chaz would soon come after me.
I rested my head on the edge of the tub and just let the tears flow. Everything was just too overwhelming.
"Adel?" Chaz knocked on the door. When I didn't answer he tried the doorknob only to find it locked. "Come on doll, just open up."
"Adelina tell us what happened? It couldn't have been that bad." Loring tried to coax me out. He sighed when he heard me crying harder. "I knew I shouldn't have let her go by herself."
"Don't beat yourself up for it Loring." Chaz smiled sympathetically. He went over to my bag where my cell phone was ringing. He looked at the caller id to see it was Ville. "Hello?"
"This is Adel's new phone is it not?" Ville asked confused to hearing a man's voice.
"No, no. It is. This is Chaz. And Ville you have the best timing. Maybe you can get Adel to come out of the bathroom."
"Why what's wrong?" Ville asked concerned.
"We don't know exactly." Chaz sighed. "Do you think you could do us a favor and come over and help. I know she won't do anything stupid, but she can't stay locked in a bathroom."
"Of course." Ville didn't hesitate to answer.
I turned on the hot water to get some steam. I could feel my chest tighten from the stress. No matter how much I tried to stop crying; I just couldn't. I closed my eyes and for the first time place my hands on my stomach under my shirt. There was a life in there.
Ville arrived twenty minutes after Chaz told him where to go.
"Good to see you again." Loring shook his hand. Ville nodded and returned the gesture. "Come on Chaz, he'll have more luck if we're not here."
Chaz hesitated, but sighed knowing Loring was right. "Please take care of her."
Ville saw how worried he was for Adel. He smiled, "I wouldn't think of doing anything less."
Chaz nodded and took one last look at the bathroom door before leaving.
I tried to calm myself down to see if they left yet; it got really quiet a few minutes ago. I jumped when the door was knocked on lightly.
"Adelina?" A new voice tried to get me out. My test tightened more; they didn't just leave me with a stranger?
"Who is it?" My throat hurt to speak.
"Unlock the door first." I shook my head and stayed silent. I heard the person sigh. "Is this any way you treat your favorite admirer?"
"Ville?" I reached up to unlock the door, but stayed leaning on the edge of the tub.
He sighed in relief when he heard the latch turn. He stood up and opened the door. He felt his heart ache when he saw me lying on the floor in a beautiful outfit with mascara slightly running down my cheeks.
He stepped over me to turn off the shower. He grabbed a face cloth and wet it with warm water. He knelt down beside me and gently washed my tear stained face catching them as they continued to fall.
Once he whipped away the mascara he placed the face cloth on the counter. I just watched him silently through the whole process.
He carried me over the bed and laid me down. Playing with my hair he finally asked, "What happened sweetheart?"
I swallowed trying to moisten my dry throat, "The committee is considering my disqualification."
Ville was stunned, "Why on Earth would they do that?" His question only brought tears to my eyes and a sob to escape. "Adelina." He cooed and kissed my temple attempting to calm me.
"Because. . ." I squeezed my eyes shut and placed a hand on my stomach again. "Because they didn't want anything to happen to me or my unborn child."
"You're pregnant?" He asked shocked.
"Yeah, and to who? The guy I'm worth a season to." I couldn't even laugh bitterly.
"What happened?" Ville asked rubbing my back.
"During a beautiful dinner at this bistro he took me too, Bam told me that I was the greatest summer fling, no strings attached." I let out a shaky breath trying to forget that whole night. "Not once did he correct himself; he just left us at that."
"You're still wearing that bracelet." He held my left wrist.
"I can't bring myself to take it off."
"You know he doesn't wear the necklace you made him." Ville said softly.
I nodded my head. "I know. He stopped wearing it before he dumped me."
"Why don't you take the bracelet off then?"
I shrugged. "Does it matter? He's going to be with me no matter what."
"True. But, wearing that bracelet shows that you still love him." He thumbed my cheek still whipping my tears.
I said nothing.
"You do, don't you." He didn't need me to answer. He put some hair behind my ear.
"I do not know why I do. I mean he does not care about how I feel obviously. Besides he has someone else now."
He cursed under his breath. He wasn't going to bring it up with what had happened today. "You know about that?"
"I've seen the articles. I'm not blind. Well, now I'm not. Have to be in love to be blind." I opened my eyes and looked at Ville.
"From what you said just a moment ago and from my point of view I see other wise." He smiled sadly.
"Well, try looking at it from my point of view." I told him.
"Then, my dear, I would not only see the love, but also feel it."