My Beloved Monster

"Do you realize that you are driving in an un-designated lane, not to mention well above the speed limit." The tall officer leaned over the window.

Bam grinded his teeth frustrated and counted to ten so he wouldn't beat the officer. "Please sir," he tried his hardest to be polite.

"You're those kids from those Jackass movies getting paid for causing trouble." The officer began to recognize the others in the car. He took out his pad and flipped it open to write up the ticket if not more. "Licensee and registration please."

"My fiance just went into labor." Bam pleaded. "She needs me."

"I'm sure." He rolled his eyes. "License and registration." The officer repeated firmly.

"Are you kidding me?" Bam tried not to shout, no matter how frustrated he was, so he could get out of here quicker and continued to try to explain. "She's at the West Chester Hospital and if I'm not there I will be in a shit load of trouble. Not to mention I want to be there."

"Do not make me repeat myself again." He began to prepare the ticket.

"Bam, show him a picture of have her or just call her up." Dunn offered trying to help Bam out.

Bam dug out his wallet from his back right pocket. He flipped it open and took a picture of him and me rubbing my large belly. "See this is Adelina. Please would just escort us so I can make it."

The officer took the picture from his hands and looked at it. "Adelina Senta?

"Yeah." Bam nodded confused how he knew my last name.

"My daughter loves her." He chuckled. "She was so upset when Adelina couldn't skate in the winter Olympics. I remember her telling me that she read that on Adelina's web-blog it was because of her pregnancy. So she's engaged to you?"

"That's right." Bam grinned proudly.

"That poor girl." He shook his head.

Bam's grinned faded into a frown and glared at the guys in the back who were laughing at him hysterically. "So will you please escort us to the hospital. I cannot miss this."

"No problem." The officer smiled and handed the picture back to Bam. "Anything for her, my daughter will be so excited when she hears this."

Bam grumbled to himself as he watched the cop in the side mirror as he walk back to his car. "I can't believe that Adel's the one that got us off the hook." Johnny laughed.

The cop car pulled out with his sirens blaring and lights flashing as Bam zoomed off behind him. "Yeah well as long as he gets me there on time, I won't care."

"But still, our credibility would have only gotten a ticket and your hot fiance got us out of trouble." Chris grinned.

"So are you ready to be a daddy Bam?" Wee-man laughed from the far back seat of the 15-passenger seat van. The car swerved jerking to the right making the van go on the dirt briefly before Bam could recover.

"I'll take that as a no." Preston piped up laughing.

Bam looked in the rear view mirror to make sure the camera crew was keeping up. "I'm ready, it's just weird."

"Can you just see him now covered in baby vomit instead of ours." Steve-o chuckled and kicked Bam's seat.

"Hopefully their's won't smell like shit like yours." Bam rolled his eyes.

"No how about this one. Can you just see Bam now in a frilly apron with a kid on each hip freaking out because they're crying and he needs to find his phone or something." Dunn laughed making everyone, but Bam crack up.

Instead of making him laugh, it only made him all the more nervous. Was he ready? Would he be a good dad? Phil was an amazing dad, but what happens if he messes up. What if he drops one? Bam shook his head knowing that was a bit extreme, he would never do that.

"What is this shit? Pick on Bam when he's vulnerable?" Bam concentrated on the flashing lights only a few feet ahead of him. Without the cop's assistance the ride from Philly would have taken three hours or more with the traffic on 95. Hopefully he will make it on time. He wanted needed to make it there on time.

"Why don't you change into the gown honey?" Ape fluffed the pillows trying to make me comfortable as I paced near the window.

"I don't want to wear that ugly thing again until the last minute possible." I sighed and wondered to myself where Bam was. I missed him and really wanted to be holding his hand right now.

"Alright if you guys would give us a few moments while I check Adel out." The doctor excused everyone from the room to check to see how many centimeters I was dilated. She took off her gloves and tossed them into the garbage. "Well you're about a little more than halfway there. Just about 6 centimeters."

I sighed and let myself plop backwards on the bed. It was good that I was having a long labor so Bam could get here, but at the same time I just was to hold them in my arms and see them for the first time already.

The doctor smiled down at me and stood up. "It's going to be okay Adel. I'll go bring everyone back into the room."

"So?" Ape asked excited.

"Six." I sighed again and rolled my eyes. "This is so boring." I commented making them laugh. "So what's the status on Bam?"

"He hasn't called back yet." Novak informed me.

I curled up into a ball as another contraction ripped right through me. Chaz rubbed my back trying to loosen the muscled, but it didn't do any good. I let out a deep breath when it was all over. "Can we come back later and go back to my party?"

"Adel stop being so childish." Chaz scolded me.

I glared at him and turned to Ape. "Where is everyone else and where's my baby?" I pouted.

"In your stomach?" Novak looked at me like I was stupid.

"Moron." Ape smacked him upside his head. "They're putting all the food away and bringing your gifts back to your house and Bruno, your baby, is with Wolf and Marie I think back at the house as well. And everyone else went home; it's almost eight Adel."

"I didn't realized it was that late already." I rubbed my belly and looked out the window where the only light was from the street lamps. I heaved myself up to go use the bathroom.

When I got back Chaz and Jussi were talking all relaxed on my bed and Novak was on the hospital phone with hopefully an update from Bam. Ape was standing next to him bickering at something and wanting to strangle Bam for putting us through so much stress.

I sat in the chair and laughed at the scene. "So this your family Milo and Milla." I spoke to my babies and shook my head. "Good luck with them; you will need it." A shadow loomed over me and I saw Jussi smiling down at me. "Hallo."

"Helloo." His lip curved on the right as he smiled lopsidedly. He squatted down in front of me and rubbed my belly speaking in Finnish to the babies.

I smiled at how cute he was being, but it made me miss Bam even more. "Hey, I am not crazy."

Jussi looked up at me innocently. "Of course not Adelina."

"Oh, Adel, Jussi, the expression goes bun in the oven." Chaz called over to us randomly.

"So?" I shook my head waiting for the rest.

"You too kept calling it bread." He chuckled to himself.

"Bread can be a bun." I shrugged. "Who came up with that expression anyway? I don't get it?"

Jussi shrugged and laughed. "Don't look at me, I'm the one who told you the wrong thing." He looked back at my swollen belly. "Which one is where?"

"On the last sonogram, Milla was up here, right under my rib cage." I gestured to the upper left side of my belly. "And Milo is squeezing my bladder." I rubbed my lower stomach.

"Ah, so the man comes first." He grinned pleased with that information. "That's how is should be."

"And why is that?" I looked up at him smiling as he got slightly nervous.

Jussi swallowed feeling slightly intimidated by this pregnant woman. But, he smirked knowing I couldn't do much damage to him anyway. "Because man rules."

I scoffed. "You wish."

"Bam's got an escort." Novak hung up the phone.

"An escort?" I looked at him funny.

He laughed, "You know like a police escort so he can break a few laws getting here on time."

"Oh, so that's good right?" I wanted to double check.

"That's great news sweetie." Ape smiled to reassure me. "He'll be able to get here quicker."

I sighed in relief hoping that this was true. Over the next hour, the contractions came quicker, almost five minutes apart. That was painful. And then, on top of it all I was too far dilated to get an epidural so I was taking the pain full on. They were all taking turns baring the pain that came with squeezing it.

I was laying on my back chewing on the ice chips that Jussi kept me supplied with. "I feel so constricted in this thing." I pulled at the hospital gown complaining for probably the tenth time. Ape finally got her way when the nurses and my doctor began to tell be the same thing. "It's uncomfortable."

Ape wiped my forehead and temples with a cool washcloth. "It's only for a little while Adel."

I smiled tired. I don't know how they were all putting up with my bitching and moaning. If I were in their shoes, I would have knocked me out already. "Shouldn't Bam be here already? It has been almost two hours."

Ape smiled sympathetically. "They were coming from Philly so two hours would be good timing Adel. Even if they do have an escort."

I laid on my side and gripped the railing near my head as another contraction came again. A nurse smiled and checked my IV and the heart rates of the babies and myself. He left mentioning something about the doctor.

"Ape, it really hurts." I whimpered as Chaz tried to sooth me by running his hand through my hair. I was too stressed and tired to tell him to stop besides the fact that it may have felt pretty good.

She gave my hand a light squeeze. "I know honey, but you're doing amazing."

The doctor came back with several nurses and began to prep the room. "Well, Adel it looks as if you're just about ready."

"What?" I panicked. "I can't do this. My water didn't even break."

"Not everyone's does. You don't have much of a choice really. They're ready to come out." She smiled at me.

I glared at her wanting to smack that smile right off of her face and if it weren't for another contraction I think I would have. The doctor lowered the bottom half of the beds, making me sit up slightly. Novak came running into the room grinning. "They're right around the corner."

"I am going to kill him." I grinded my teeth as the sweat poured down my forehead and my muscles contracted again giving me no time to recover from the last one. The doctor slid an oxygen mask to help me get the proper oxygen and keep my blood pressure stable.

I heard crashing and rolled my eyes knowing it was probably Bam. Not only was it Bam, but it was also the Jackass and camera crew filming. "Did I miss anything?" He grinned as making his grand entrance.

His face paled when he saw that I was at my peak and ready to give birth. But, his nervousness soon went away when he noticed how beautiful I looked even all red and sweaty with a mask over my face. And he smiled knowing how this moment will change everything for the better.

Bam lifted the mask off and kissed me hard and passionately. I bit down on his lip making him pull back. "What was that for?"

"You're late." I glared and placed the mask over my moth feeling slightly dizzy without it.

"Nope," He smiled and sat behind me holding me protectively in his arms. "I am just in time." I leaned into him welcoming his warmth and shield that he provided. I felt as I could concur the world in his arms. He yelped in pain when I squeezed his hands as another contraction came yet again. "Shit Adel when did you get so fucking strong." He rolled his eyes as he demoted his masculinity when the guys started cracking up and making fun of how weak Bam was.

The doctor was about to make them all leave the room when she realized that they probably wouldn't have listened anyway.

It took another hour later, but at 11:58pm. I had to laugh it was the last possible second before the next day. They were already like their father.

I laid in Bam's arms exhausted and smiling when I hear their first cry and breath of life. That was the most beautiful moment in my entire life. No competition could compare to this. They handed me Milo Emanuel and Milla Constance cleaned and wrapped in a blanket.

I kissed each of their foreheads and was surprised with this feeling that overwhelmed me. That I would lay down my life at any harms way to protect them. They were absolutely beautiful too. Not to wrinkle or too small, which was a miracle in itself since they were two and a half weeks early.

"So what do you think?" I sighed laying my head on Bam's shoulder.

"Where's their hair. They're like mini Dico's." Knoxville laughed.

I chuckled, tired. It was true they have little peach fuzz for hair. Ape looked at us and wiped her eyes with a tissue. She smiled and ushered everyone out of the room so Bam and I could have a moment together.

"So how does it feel to be a dad?" I kissed his cheek.

"It still hasn't sunken in yet." He carefully took Milla from my arms and made sure he supported her head. "But, I feel satisfied."

I smiled understanding him completely. "Do you think they will keep their blue eyes?"

"Of course." He grinned and looked back down at Milla. She opened her tiny eyes slowly. "Hey baby girl." I smiled and held Milo close to me. "Isn't weird that you don't have to think twice about loving them or wanting to protect them and yet, we have barely known them for five minutes."

"Yeah," I sighed in content. "But, we have known them for almost nine months."

Bam smiled and kissed my neck tenderly. "I love you."

"I love you." I whispered closing my eyes drifting off.

"You two tired mommy out huh." Bam kissed Milla and rubbed Milo's head gently.

Ape and Phil walked over quietly. Ape grinned. "You guys are so beautiful."

Bam rolled his eyes, but could only agree with his mom. "So you guys get to be grandparents again."

Ape gently took Milo from my arms as to not disturb me from the little sleep I would get for a while. "They are so precious."

Phil rubbed his tiny hand. "You know we weren't sure if we would ever get grandkids from you." Bam glared insulted. Phil laughed at the sour look on his son's face. "What, are you surprised by that?"

Bam sighed. "I guess not. I just proved you wrong anyway." He looked down at Adel and smiled lovingly. "Did she like the video, or you guys didn't get to see it."

Ape cradled her new grandson. "So she did. She loved it, especially since she wasn't expecting it."

"Good." Bam smiled proud.

Ape smiled. "Look how she's just watching you Bam."

Bam looked down and smiled at his daughter. His daughter. He looked over at his son. The whole thing was surreal. He was engaged and had two beautiful babies. Bam laughed. "I still cannot believe that I'm a dad."

Ape laughed and nodded her head agreeing. "I can't wait until you have to change a dirty diaper."

Phil laughed. "I would pay to see that."