Passion Is In The Risk

Stupid security! No one ever told me you had to bring your freakin' ID just to get into a famous person's funeral. Luckily I had my birth certificate, because relocating means new schools which.. usually includes paperwork.

I had to come. I mean, after a life changing conclusion that my newly found dad had just past away, I should at least say my condolences to his true family, right?

So once the security guard let me through, I started with his parents, and my grandparents. Who also have no idea who I am.

I sighed at the thought and made my way over and said my sorrows. They gave me an odd look, but nodded anyway.

I felt odd just standing there, looking, and feeling, like I didn't belong. No one knew who I was, why I was here, or what my business was even being here.

Everyone was crying, while I just had a face of sorrow. Before people could continue to glare at me, the preacher asked if anyone wanted to say something. I wanted to... I just had nothing to say.

Finally, I was about to step up, tell the people how sorry I was, and why I was here in the first place, but Brian stepped up before I could.

With every word he said, someone closer to him than I was let out a heart throbbing sob, letting everyone else around know how much they missed him.

But I didn't cry. At least not yet.

More towards the end of his epilogue, the preacher, who I found was called Father Adams, asked me of my being here.

I looked up at him, ready to put up a fight to stay and give my condolences, but instead of using words, I pulled out my birth certificate for the second time today and gave it to him.

His brow furrowed in confusion after studying it for a while.

"You're his... daughter?" he asked.

I sighed, then thought of something.

"Let me say something. I want to explain to everyone, not just you." I said full-hearted.

At first he was hesitant, but then nodded, going up to the podium, and announced that I wanted to say something.

"Ladies and gentlemen, we have one more person who would like to say a few words. This is Danniel Sullivan, James Sullivan's daughter." I stood by him as he introduced me, then took his place.

Everyone's eyes were glued on me, a look of surprise on there faces.

"Thank-" my voice was hoarse, making me clear my throat and start over, "Thank you Brian for that meaningful speech." He wore a look of confusion, just as everyone else.

"I- I'm not sure where to start." I fiddled with my hands, keeping my concentration on them, or I know I would make a fool of myself. "I guess I'll tell it how my mother's closest friend told me." I took a deep breath, knowing that this was going to be a loooong story.

"When, Jimmy, my d-dad, was fourteen, fourteen years ago, he went to a friends party, just wanting to get drunk for the first time. That's not all he did for the first time. That night, my mother was impregnated with me.

"At first I didn't get it. They told me I was a blessing to my mother," I scrunched my nose out of habit, "but when she was sixteen, she couldn't handle me and turned to drugs, losing custody of me. The government tried to find a family member to take care of me, but that didn't happen.

"My mother's best friend offered to care for me, even though she was raising a child herself. From then on, I was a part of her family. I found out Jimmy was my dad when I broke my arm three years ago. The hospital made me do blood work, and his name came up as my father." I stopped, taking another breath, and biting the inside of my cheek.

"At first I didn't believe it," I chuckled inwardly, "But then I asked everyone that knew my mother. I researched. I put as much thought into it as I could, until I was convinced."

All the intense stairs from before were now sympathetic ones, complete with the tears of there loss.

"As for my being here.. I wanted to come to give my condolences to the friend that will be missed, the son every parent would want.. and the father I never had."

With that, I stepped away from the podium and Fiction began to play as they lowered my father. The funeral was open casket, and at the sight at his peaceful state, tears begun to well up in my eyes.

I cried along with them. Not sobbing, but silently crying, and wishing that he would have lived for me to see him. To talk to him, and to live with him.

The warmness of a hand on my shoulder made me jump and meet eyes with Brian's big, puffy, brown ones. He took his hand back quickly. We held each others gaze for a while, trying to emotionally mend the open wounds that Ji- my dad had left.

When our moment was over, he nodded his head towards the rest of the band, and some other people, that were standing in aw at us. I had a feeling they wanted to talk..