Status: Comment
I Always End up Feeling Cheated
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Rane sat behind the counter at her work, the radio playing in the background as her eyes scanned the room, waiting for someone to come in and ask for her attention.
“Err excuse me Ran-ee, I have an appointment” a girl no older than 15 said as she walked to the desk Rane sat behind, she looked up, not even making a reaction to the mispronunciation of her name.
“It’s pronounced ‘rain’ like the weather, and name please?” Rane asked, offering the girl a polite smile as she turned to the computer ready to type the girls name into the system.
“Claire Andrews” the girl mumbled feeling slightly embarrassed about possibly offending the older girl, who just looked at her nodding slightly as she typed in the name before telling the girl to take a seat and that the doctor would be right with her.
As the younger girl was beckoned into the office by the doctor, the waiting room was silent and empty, the sound of the radio being the only source of noise, the beginning notes of a familiar song beginning as the anger started to bubble inside of the girl, as the song she write began playing but with the words changed to make it look like he was the victim.
Because he was always the victim.
I can feel her breath
As she's sleeping next to me
Sharing pillows and cold feet
She can feel my heart;
Fell asleep to its beat
Under blankets and warm sheets
If only I could be in that bed again
If only it were me instead of him
Nick rolled over in his sleep, his head burrowing into the crook of Rane’s neck, his ice cold feet intertwining with hers, making her shiver slightly at the sudden change of temperature.
After hour’s of practically baby-sitting Nick when he had come home from a party, drunk as usual, finally falling to sleep with his head on her chest, her hand combing through his hair soothing him to sleep.
Does he watch your favorite movies?
Does he hold you when you cry?
Does he let you tell him all your favorite parts
When you've seen it a million times?
Does he sing to all your music
While you dance to Purple Rain?
Does he do all these things
Like I used to?
The chorus hit her hard, it reminded her of the day of the argument, when everything she thought was pure and strong began falling apart, the day that inspired her to write this song.
”Nick you fucking kissed her, stop denying it! I saw you with my own eyes” Rane said, looking down to Nick as he sat on the couch in front of her, glaring out the window as Rane’s face filled with sorrow.
“So what? We’re over? Because of one drunken kiss?” Nick questioned, his glare on the window hardening as he spat the words out, causing Rane’s face to crumble even more.
“I don’t know Nick! You constantly come home drunk. I feel like I don’t even know you anymore…” she began her sentence trailing off as she turned her gaze away from him, not wanting to look at him. Look at the faux orange hair she adored so much, the slightly big nose that made her heart skip a beat, and the adorable smile and that made her want to kiss him. The boy that would always somehow get her forgiveness, no matter what.
“Well then think about it this way. When you meet your next boyfriend I want you to think about this. Will he watch your favourite movies and let you tell him you’re favourite parts no matter how many times you’ve seen it? Will he hold you when you cry? Will he sing to all your music while you dance to Purple Rain, our song Rainey, because you will be constantly comparing him to me and all these things knowing he doesn’t do them like I used to” Nick said, jumping from the couch to stand infront of Rane, taking her cheek in his hand turning her face to look at him before giving her a long look before leaving the house.
Fourteen months and seven days ago
Oh, I know you know
How we felt about that night
Just your skin against the window
Oh we took it slow
And we both know
It should have been me inside that car
It should have been me instead of him in the dark
Rane and Nick had been going out for nearly two year’s and didn’t have intercouse untill there first anniversary, as it was Rane’s first time and Nick told her it was his, but everytime she thought back to the time he came home drunk from a party at Halvo’s so drunk that he admitted to Rane that he cheated on her when they started going out.
Some slut who’s name he didn’t know, in the back of her car, him giving his virginity away to some busty blonde slut who just wanted a quick fuck. And no matter how many times she said she forgave him, she could never look at him in the same way again, always imaging the other girl’s mouth upon his.
Does he watch your favorite movies?
Does he hold you when you cry?
Does he let you tell him all your favorite parts
When you've seen it a million times?
Does he sing to all your music
While you dance to Purple Rain?
Does he do all these things
Like I used to?
I know, Love
(I'm a sucker for that feeling)
Happens all the time, Love
(I always end up feeling cheated)
You're on my mind, Love
(Oh darling, led her where that leaded)
It happens all the time, Love, yeah
Rane didn’t know why she hadn’t reached over to the radio, turned it off or at least unplugged it, stopping the song she had written from coming back to take revenge, his sweet voice crusading her, as she bit her lip, the iron taste of tongue filling her mouth as she willed herself not to cry. Rane wondered why she stayed with Nick for so long, their relationship was a vicious of cycle of Nick screwing up, begging Rane for forgiveness and her, always being a fool, forgave him. But knowing that down the line, she was only going to get cheated on. Again.
Will he love you like I loved you?
Will he tell you every day?
Will he make you make you feel like you're invincible
With every word he'll say?
Can you promise me if this was right,
Don't throw this all away?
Can you do all these things?
Will you do all these things
Like we used to?
Rane packed her bags quickly, even though it was a shitty move, she wanted to leave before Nick came back, so she didn’t have to see him again. So he wasn’t able to convince her out of it again.
“What’s going on Rane?” Nick’s voice asked stonily as he opened the front door to see Rane heading towards him with two suitcases.
“Im leaving you” She said simply going to push pass him to walk through the door but that was impossible with him grabbing her shoulders to hold him in pleace/
“Well when you’re with the new guy just think about it this way. Will he love you like I loved you? Will he tell you everyday? Will he make you feel like you’re invincible with every word he says? No he wont. And you know that this is right but you’re going to throw this all away, as long as you know the next guy wont do all the things like I used too” Nick said, before removing his hand off her shoulder, walking past her, and once she exited the house closed the door on her face, friendship and relationship.
It was four day’s later that Rane had finished the song and figured out the music to it on the piano, making a copy of the original version’s of both before puttting it into an envelope, sealing it with a bit of selotape before scribbling Nick’s name on it and address, feeling like she had finally started afresh.
“Err excuse me Ran-ee, I have an appointment” a girl no older than 15 said as she walked to the desk Rane sat behind, she looked up, not even making a reaction to the mispronunciation of her name.
“It’s pronounced ‘rain’ like the weather, and name please?” Rane asked, offering the girl a polite smile as she turned to the computer ready to type the girls name into the system.
“Claire Andrews” the girl mumbled feeling slightly embarrassed about possibly offending the older girl, who just looked at her nodding slightly as she typed in the name before telling the girl to take a seat and that the doctor would be right with her.
As the younger girl was beckoned into the office by the doctor, the waiting room was silent and empty, the sound of the radio being the only source of noise, the beginning notes of a familiar song beginning as the anger started to bubble inside of the girl, as the song she write began playing but with the words changed to make it look like he was the victim.
Because he was always the victim.
I can feel her breath
As she's sleeping next to me
Sharing pillows and cold feet
She can feel my heart;
Fell asleep to its beat
Under blankets and warm sheets
If only I could be in that bed again
If only it were me instead of him
Nick rolled over in his sleep, his head burrowing into the crook of Rane’s neck, his ice cold feet intertwining with hers, making her shiver slightly at the sudden change of temperature.
After hour’s of practically baby-sitting Nick when he had come home from a party, drunk as usual, finally falling to sleep with his head on her chest, her hand combing through his hair soothing him to sleep.
Does he watch your favorite movies?
Does he hold you when you cry?
Does he let you tell him all your favorite parts
When you've seen it a million times?
Does he sing to all your music
While you dance to Purple Rain?
Does he do all these things
Like I used to?
The chorus hit her hard, it reminded her of the day of the argument, when everything she thought was pure and strong began falling apart, the day that inspired her to write this song.
”Nick you fucking kissed her, stop denying it! I saw you with my own eyes” Rane said, looking down to Nick as he sat on the couch in front of her, glaring out the window as Rane’s face filled with sorrow.
“So what? We’re over? Because of one drunken kiss?” Nick questioned, his glare on the window hardening as he spat the words out, causing Rane’s face to crumble even more.
“I don’t know Nick! You constantly come home drunk. I feel like I don’t even know you anymore…” she began her sentence trailing off as she turned her gaze away from him, not wanting to look at him. Look at the faux orange hair she adored so much, the slightly big nose that made her heart skip a beat, and the adorable smile and that made her want to kiss him. The boy that would always somehow get her forgiveness, no matter what.
“Well then think about it this way. When you meet your next boyfriend I want you to think about this. Will he watch your favourite movies and let you tell him you’re favourite parts no matter how many times you’ve seen it? Will he hold you when you cry? Will he sing to all your music while you dance to Purple Rain, our song Rainey, because you will be constantly comparing him to me and all these things knowing he doesn’t do them like I used to” Nick said, jumping from the couch to stand infront of Rane, taking her cheek in his hand turning her face to look at him before giving her a long look before leaving the house.
Fourteen months and seven days ago
Oh, I know you know
How we felt about that night
Just your skin against the window
Oh we took it slow
And we both know
It should have been me inside that car
It should have been me instead of him in the dark
Rane and Nick had been going out for nearly two year’s and didn’t have intercouse untill there first anniversary, as it was Rane’s first time and Nick told her it was his, but everytime she thought back to the time he came home drunk from a party at Halvo’s so drunk that he admitted to Rane that he cheated on her when they started going out.
Some slut who’s name he didn’t know, in the back of her car, him giving his virginity away to some busty blonde slut who just wanted a quick fuck. And no matter how many times she said she forgave him, she could never look at him in the same way again, always imaging the other girl’s mouth upon his.
Does he watch your favorite movies?
Does he hold you when you cry?
Does he let you tell him all your favorite parts
When you've seen it a million times?
Does he sing to all your music
While you dance to Purple Rain?
Does he do all these things
Like I used to?
I know, Love
(I'm a sucker for that feeling)
Happens all the time, Love
(I always end up feeling cheated)
You're on my mind, Love
(Oh darling, led her where that leaded)
It happens all the time, Love, yeah
Rane didn’t know why she hadn’t reached over to the radio, turned it off or at least unplugged it, stopping the song she had written from coming back to take revenge, his sweet voice crusading her, as she bit her lip, the iron taste of tongue filling her mouth as she willed herself not to cry. Rane wondered why she stayed with Nick for so long, their relationship was a vicious of cycle of Nick screwing up, begging Rane for forgiveness and her, always being a fool, forgave him. But knowing that down the line, she was only going to get cheated on. Again.
Will he love you like I loved you?
Will he tell you every day?
Will he make you make you feel like you're invincible
With every word he'll say?
Can you promise me if this was right,
Don't throw this all away?
Can you do all these things?
Will you do all these things
Like we used to?
Rane packed her bags quickly, even though it was a shitty move, she wanted to leave before Nick came back, so she didn’t have to see him again. So he wasn’t able to convince her out of it again.
“What’s going on Rane?” Nick’s voice asked stonily as he opened the front door to see Rane heading towards him with two suitcases.
“Im leaving you” She said simply going to push pass him to walk through the door but that was impossible with him grabbing her shoulders to hold him in pleace/
“Well when you’re with the new guy just think about it this way. Will he love you like I loved you? Will he tell you everyday? Will he make you feel like you’re invincible with every word he says? No he wont. And you know that this is right but you’re going to throw this all away, as long as you know the next guy wont do all the things like I used too” Nick said, before removing his hand off her shoulder, walking past her, and once she exited the house closed the door on her face, friendship and relationship.
It was four day’s later that Rane had finished the song and figured out the music to it on the piano, making a copy of the original version’s of both before puttting it into an envelope, sealing it with a bit of selotape before scribbling Nick’s name on it and address, feeling like she had finally started afresh.
♠ ♠ ♠
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