Kiss Me Like you Did -IGHS Sequel-

Taylor’s POV

I wandered drunkenly back up the stairs to my own room, a huge grin plastered on my face. I couldn’t wipe it off. I felt lighter. Even though my boyfriend – my amazing, thoughtful, considerate, textbook-perfect boyfriend – had been at the other side of the door as I’d had my hand down Jake’s pants, I felt incredible. Guilt was twisting into a small, tight knot at the base of my stomach, but the feelings of happiness and relief that were washing over me like so many waves as I trotted up the stairs were monopolizing my attention. I couldn’t wait until tomorrow.

I opened the door to my room and closed it behind me, still grinning, and leaned against it, closing my eyes and taking a deep, calming breath.

‘Huh.’

My eyes snapped open and I saw Landon sitting on his bed. The lights had been off when I walked in and I’d assumed he was out.

‘Why are you sitting in the dark?’ I asked dubiously.

‘Migraine. Why do you look like all your Christmases have come at one?’

I blushed. ‘I don’t.’

‘You do. When I look like that it’s usually girl-related. But I’m guessing this has less than nothing to do with Ryan.’

‘Dude, you are like really good at this Dorm Assistant thing,’ I said lightly, trying to avoid questioning as I pushed myself off the door and went to sit on my bed.

‘Anything to do with this ex who’s studying engineering?’ he asked, ignoring me, but he was grinning. I love my roommate.

I bit my lip as the smile I’d been wearing since I left Jake’s room spread back across my face. I didn’t even have to say anything.

‘Score,’ Landon said appreciatively, and if I’d had any doubts over his increasing dislike for Ryan before, they were eradicated now. ‘So what’s the plan?’

‘I’m gonna meet up with him tomorrow while Ryan’s in a test,’ I imparted happily.

‘No, douchebag,’ Landon said, rolling his eyes. ‘What are you gonna do about Ryan?’

I looked at him blankly. I hadn’t even thought about Ryan, not really.

‘There’s a really obvious answer here that I want you to say but you’re not saying it,’ Landon told me matter-of-factly. When I did say anything, he rolled his eyes again and said emphatically, ‘You have to choose one of them. You can’t just string them both along.’

‘I know that,’ I said moodily, wrinkling my nose. Before he could argue with me further, there was a knock on the door and I glanced at Landon; he shrugged. I stood up to go answer it, and nearly groaned out loud when I saw Ryan standing there.

‘Um,’ he started, biting his lip, and I remembered for the first time since Jake had walked into his room that we’d had a fight last night. ‘Hey.’

‘Hi,’ I said, standing back to allow him into the room. He walked past me, looking like he couldn’t decide whether to bring up the argument or just act like nothing had happened.

‘Where were you earlier?’ he asked lightly, obviously opting for the latter. ‘I thought we could hang out. When I went back to my room Jake was-’ He cut himself off, his mouth clamping shut. I saw the panic in his eyes as he realised the potential this situation had to blow up – how would I have reacted knowing Jake was scoring in his room if I hadn’t been, you know, scoring too? ‘Busy,’ he finished, and I could see Landon shaking with suppressed laughter out of the corner of my eye.

‘I went for a walk,’ I managed to choke out; Landon was distracting me. ‘Why didn’t you let him, Landon?’ I asked, turning my gaze innocently at the guy grinning from under his covers.

‘I just got back two minutes before you, Tay,’ he lied, just as innocently. He didn’t look like he was going to walk out and give us any privacy this time; he wanted to watch, I guess, as I dumped Ryan. Well that wasn’t going to happen.

‘Anyway, it’s time for your meds,’ Ryan interrupted, shrugging apologetically. He knows I don’t like taking them, even though I’ve never told him. Sedately, I went to the desk at my side of the room and opened the drawer, taking out the necessary bottles and blister packets. Ryan watched me carefully, handing me a bottle of water, and I frowned a little, in concentration. One pill at a time, I pretended to swallow them, slipping them under the muscle at the base of my thumb instead and letting them fall down my sleeve, where they nestled, conveniently, in the crook of my arm.

‘Can we, um,’ I started, when I’d finished, looking back to Ryan. ‘Could we maybe go somewhere?’

He looked surprised, but nodded. ‘Sure,’ he said, sounding happier. I guess he thought we were back on good terms. ‘Where?’

‘It should be somewhere private,’ I admitted, biting my lip. I wasn’t really sure what I was gonna do yet, but I didn’t want to run the risk working up the courage to break up with him in case he started crying or something and we were in public. That wouldn’t be fair.

‘We could go to my room,’ he said, after it became obvious that Landon wasn’t going anywhere. ‘Jake might be finished.’

‘Cool,’ I said, grabbing my jacket.

‘No!’ Ryan said suddenly, his eyes widening. ‘Meet me there in ten minutes?’

I didn’t bother to ask him why. I knew he didn’t want t risk me hearing Jake moan through the door again.

‘Sure,’ I said, dropping onto my bed. He looked relieved that he wouldn’t have to come up with a reason for his weird behaviour. It would give me a chance to get rid of the pills anyway.

Jake’s POV

Kelly and Johnny were sitting across me in the campus restaurant, staring.

‘Wha’?’ I asked around a mouthful of hamburger, then swallowed and took another huge bite, following it with a handful of French fries and three gulps of a strawberry milkshake.

‘You’re eating more right now than you have in the last year combined,’ Kelly said, dumbfounded. ‘What the fuck happened today?’

I shrugged, tearing open a packet of crisps and stuffing a handful into my mouth. Normally I would have narrated for Johnny but my hands were too busy feeding me and I figured he wouldn’t mind lip-reading just this once. ‘Met Johnny for hot chocolate,’ I started. ‘Walked home with him a Noah. Made out with Taylor in my room. Rang you.’

‘You what?!’ Kelly shrieked, and everyone in the restaurant stopped talking for a minute to turn and stare. She didn’t even seem to notice; she looked completely shocked while Johnny looked delighted.

‘Had a hot chocolate with Joh-’

‘Don’t even try to fuck with me right now,’ Kelly snapped, but a huge grin was spreading across her face. ‘How did it happen?’

‘He was there when I got back, waiting for Ryan,’ I explained, for once not choking on his name. ‘And we were talking kind of awkwardly, and then, I dunno, he told me to shut up and kissed me.’

‘That’s pretty hot,’ Kelly said appreciatively.

‘I thought so.’

And now you’re eating? Johnny asked.

I dropped the food – burger in one hand, Snickers in the other – and lifted my T-shirt to expose my still-flat tummy, with the speech bubble that I possibly would never wash off.

‘Taylor wrote that?’

I nodded, finishing my French fries and leaning back in my chair satisfied.

That’s gonna hurt like a bitch in about five minutes, Johnny informed me, grinning

I know. Worth it. I was starving.

Taylor’s POV

I ignored Landon’s surprised expression as I stood up and shook my sleeve over the bin, the little pills rattling into it, and left the room, making my way back downstairs. I wondered if Jake would still be there. My heart rate increased just thinking about him.

I knocked and Ryan let me in, the room was empty and I couldn’t help feeling a little disappointed. I still didn’t know if I was gonna break up with Ryan. I wanted to be with Jake, obviously, but Ryan had been a huge part of my life for so long now. It was like, in a perfect world, I’d have both. Jake, as the love of my life, and Ryan, as my guardian angel.

‘Okay,’ Ryan said as soon as I was sitting on his bed, and I cringed inwardly; he was about to make a speech. I took a breath to interrupt him, but he launched into it before I could even get started, and there was no stopping him. ‘I know things have been really shit lately. And I know we fight a lot. But stuff like this happens, right? It’s just a phase.’

I was exhausted already with the effort this situation was gonna require. I pushed myself back on the bed and sat across it, leaning my back against the wall.

‘It’s like a natural cycle of relationships.’ He sat down on the edge of the bed and I looked at him, wondering if he was finished. ‘All I know is that I love you,’ he said softly, looking me right in the eyes. I wanted to look away, but I couldn’t. He deserved my attention, at least. ‘I love you more than I’ve ever loved anything before. I’d die without you, Tay. I couldn’t live without you in my life. It would destroy me.’

I swallowed. Shit. Shitshitshit. Guilt twisted tightly in my stomach, and I had to force my eyes not to flicker across the room to Jake’s bed.

Ryan reached over and took my hand. ‘Say something,’ he said quietly.

I opened my mouth but nothing came out. Say what? That I loved him too, when I didn’t? That I loved Jake, even though he’d just told me that losing me would destroy him?

I was saved having to say anything by the sound of a key turning in the lock. My pulse sped up at the anticipation of seeing Jake walk through the door. I had to bite my lip hard not to let a huge smile appear on my face when I saw him. He glanced at me, and I saw the same effort register on his face, which only made me want to smile more. Then his eyes flickered down to our joined hands and his eyes dulled a little.

I widened my eyes at him, trying to send him mental messages.

His face cleared.

I love how we still know each other so well.

Kelly and Johnny walked through the door after him and Kelly didn’t even bother trying to conceal her grin. I knew then that Jake had told her, and I hoped she wouldn’t bound across the room and hug me, like I knew she wanted to. Luckily, she restrained herself.

‘Hey Taylor,’ she said, her voice full of suggestion. ‘Hey Ryan.’

Johnny waved at us and I took the opportunity to take my hand out of Ryan’s and wave back.

Before Jake could even close the door behind them, it was pushed open again and Jacob, Noah, and Ethan burst into the room, grinning.

‘Dude!’ Jacob exclaimed grinning, looking between Ryan and Jake excitedly. The others looked equally enthusiastic. ‘Who was having sex in here earlier?!’

Shit. Double shit.

Ryan glanced at me quickly, and I could practically feel the panic rolling off him. Since he thought it was my first time hearing about it. And it clearly hadn’t been us.

‘I’m looking at you Jake,’ Jacob went on, oblivious.

‘Um,’ Jake said, glancing at me quickly. I looked back at him, panicking a little. ‘I was, um...’

Jake’s POV

‘I was, um...’

Somebody grabbed my hand, and I looked down at it, then up at Johnny. He twined his fingers though mine and shrugged, grinning.

Jacob smirked. ‘Well I can’t say I didn’t see that coming,’ he said smugly. I was still staring at Johnny in shock. Then I glanced at Taylor, who looked confused, and finally at Noah, who was staring at Johnny. His face looked like stone.

Johnny squeezed my hand and I snapped out of it.

‘Uh. Yeah,’ I said, even though I could feel Kelly seething beside me.

Jacob walked over to his brother and raised his hand for a high five. At least one of us ended up with a Chaplain, he joked, his hands moving like lightning so Kelly wouldn’t catch it. Poor bastard.

Taylor’s POV

Okay.

What?