Don't Let This Carry on Too Long
as i face the crowd and take a bow
I was empty, no feelings, no emotions, just thoughts. Too many thoughts.
So many questions I had to answer, very few I could even begin to think about.
"Why did I let people take advantage of me like this?" - this was the only thing that repeatedly entered my unstable mind, the only thing I could seem to find an answer for.
My hesitating and heavy legs dragged their way to the old bridge on the outskirts of Ponty, this bridge held most of my favourite childhood memories. Where I'd gone fishing during the summer months back when I was younger - and not such a fool.
Rain dripped from each facial feature, and every strand of my wavy hair that was poking out of my black hoodie.
I sat cross-legged on the saturated grass, watching each individual raindrop splashing and creating ripples in the filthy flowing water infront of my squinting eyes. Every raindrop splashing and falling like a tear.
My head dropped into my soaking hands, my elbows resting on my knees. Thoughts still running furiously through my overworked brain.
I, Ian Watkins, sat alone. Again.
I began to mutter lyrics through my shivers, whispering them to myself, taking in each word.
"Take me by the hand, and lead me to the slaughter, close my eyes and sing, just let it go"
My cold hands began splashing and running through the puddles that filled the surrounding land beside me, before depserately fumbling in my pocket, in search of what can only be described as "my personal painkiller".
"The warmest rain it falls, on the darkest crimson mountain" - I tore open the bag in pure desire and desperation, before swallowing everything within the small plastic bag.
"Seeping from the wound I think alone, but don't say the pain will fade tomorrow, the last thing that I'll feel will be today" My sobs taking over the fading words.
My head resumed its position, buried within my sorry hands. My only feeling was the burning sensation of my salty tears as they fell rapidly from my eyes, which began to get heavier, before sheer darkness and peace.
So many questions I had to answer, very few I could even begin to think about.
"Why did I let people take advantage of me like this?" - this was the only thing that repeatedly entered my unstable mind, the only thing I could seem to find an answer for.
My hesitating and heavy legs dragged their way to the old bridge on the outskirts of Ponty, this bridge held most of my favourite childhood memories. Where I'd gone fishing during the summer months back when I was younger - and not such a fool.
Rain dripped from each facial feature, and every strand of my wavy hair that was poking out of my black hoodie.
I sat cross-legged on the saturated grass, watching each individual raindrop splashing and creating ripples in the filthy flowing water infront of my squinting eyes. Every raindrop splashing and falling like a tear.
My head dropped into my soaking hands, my elbows resting on my knees. Thoughts still running furiously through my overworked brain.
I, Ian Watkins, sat alone. Again.
I began to mutter lyrics through my shivers, whispering them to myself, taking in each word.
"Take me by the hand, and lead me to the slaughter, close my eyes and sing, just let it go"
My cold hands began splashing and running through the puddles that filled the surrounding land beside me, before depserately fumbling in my pocket, in search of what can only be described as "my personal painkiller".
"The warmest rain it falls, on the darkest crimson mountain" - I tore open the bag in pure desire and desperation, before swallowing everything within the small plastic bag.
"Seeping from the wound I think alone, but don't say the pain will fade tomorrow, the last thing that I'll feel will be today" My sobs taking over the fading words.
My head resumed its position, buried within my sorry hands. My only feeling was the burning sensation of my salty tears as they fell rapidly from my eyes, which began to get heavier, before sheer darkness and peace.
♠ ♠ ♠
short chapter, apologies.next chapter will make more sense.
comment and let me know your opinions on it.
keep reading please! ;D
thanks. X.