Bittersweet World

My chest pounded as a slammed the door to my small car. Clapping with each step, I walked into the club. "Fangs 4 the Memories," I mocked. "How lame." Still, this was one spot where I was safe to do my research, away from people I knew. I didn't risk being known here, and that comforted me.

Each time I came in, the loud music always caught me off guard. One of the bands who frequents the bar was playing. They didn't write their own songs, but they played some cliche songs that were a sad attempt at sounding hardcore.

"Hand into a fist,
Static in my head,
Now I'm sitting face to face with loneliness,
What did I expect?
Did I sleep forever and go..."

I didn't think they lyrics made much sense, but that wasn't what I was there for. Walking to the end of the bar, I sat and pounded my hand on the wooden surface. "Coke, please," I elevated my voice loud enough for the barkeep to hear me.

"You got it," he said.

Looking around, it was obvious not many people ordered soda. It was usually red wines.
Because it looks like bloooood! I laughed to myself.

The bartender reached under the bar into a mini fridge and pulled a can of Coke from it's shelves. "Here you go, miss," he popped the top, leaving the tab up.

I guess it was just how they did things. I found it strange, personally.

With soda in hand, I looked around for who I'd study tonight. Between me and the band was a group of three guys, and two girls. It looked like the guys and the girls were separate parties. The girls, it seemed, had just walked up to them to hit on the guys.

Then I noticed something that caught me totally off guard. As they two groups talked, the men didn't have any defensive stance. Their posture was totally open. Normally, people shift one leg forward, cross their arms, or have some sort of thing to keep them guarded off. These guys were totally open. The girls, however, were defensive. A girl's arms were crossed. The other was looking behind the guys, not at them; it was a common trick when people get nervous.

I noticed myself drinking my Coke faster than usual. Already half the soda was drank, yet I'd only been there for a couple minutes.

"With my hands around your neck who will stop me now," the speakers boomed.

One of the three men turned to look at me, and noticed my staring. An involuntary shiver traveled through my body. His hair was a fiery mixture of red and brown that shown clearly through the crowd of black and blonde hair inspired by Gerard Way. Even as people passed into my line of vision, I could see him. His head cocked to the side, as people moved, I saw him talking to one of his company. His pointed a limp finger in my direction. A smirk. I felt very unsafe suddenly. I quickly turned from him and put my attention to the shelves of alcohol.

The new song began to play, the opening of it, a scream, made me feel more intimidated. I hated this feeling, it made me feel out of control. Like I was unable to decide what was to happen to myself.

"You know I make you wanna scream,
You know I make you wanna run from me baby,
But now it's too late you've wasted all your time"

Why did they have such creepy music here? Why did it have to be so incredibly murderous and masochistic at this exact moment? My chest pounded. I could hear it in my ears. My face flushed.

"Relax while you're closing your eyes to me,
So warm as I'm setting you free,
With your arms by your side there's no struggling,
Pleasure's all mine this time"

My chest continued to heave. Every noise became more crisp. The clicking of large boots. It was coming closer.

"May I buy you a drink?" It wasn't the horrible vocals. It was a question, addressed to me.
I turned, to see a man who stuck out against the glam goth crowd; a simple t-shirt and jeans draped over him. He was the man with the fiery hair. The softness in his voice caught me off guard, but helped me calm myself. "Uh, yeah. Thanks. Just... Just a Coke though."
"Drinking is such a bad habit." Sitting in the bar next to me, he rested his elbow on the wooden bar. "Good for you for not taking part."

"Yeah. Well.. You know. I'm driving myself home so..." I blurted. Why did I have to sound so stupid.

Slamming a fist into the dark wood, he said, "Two Cokes." He began looking me straight in the side of my face, determined to get something out of me.

Reluctantly, I gave in and turned to him.

"I want to talk to you more tonight. Would you mind going over with my friends while I wait for our sodas?" His face cradled in his hand which rested on the bar made him look sincere. I justify obeying him by saying it would be better to study them up close.

"Yeah," I say. I didn't have anything else to say. This was the type of person who sucks the words right out of you.

"Thanks."

As I walked over, I realized I couldn't think of what I'd say. Things like, "Hey, your friend told me to come over here," made me sound like even more of a weirdo than any of the other weirdos in here.

I considered changing my mind. As I began to turn back, he stood from the bar stool and said, "Your soda, my dear?" and handed one of the soda cans to me. The tab, as always, still standing straight up.

"Cherishing, those feelings pleasuring,
Cover me, unwanted clemency,
Scream till there's silence,
Scream while there's life left, vanishing,
Scream from the pleasure unmask your desire,
Perishing"

"Why, thank you," I said politely.

Was this how these things worked. You just sit around and a guy buys you a drink? That's what I'd heard and seen in movies, but I'd never experienced it myself. I took several small sips as opposed to gulping like I had before. Though I was feeling weaker, I was feeling much more comfortable. It was nice. I drank more, hoping the sugar would keep me awake.
As I stood next to the extremely handsome stranger, I notice my legs going weak. Out of my own control, I take hold of his arm for support. "Sorry," I say, weakly.

With the most charming smile on his face, he says, "You alright?"

"Scream, Scream, Scream the way you would if I ravaged your body,
Scream, Scream, Scream the way you would if I ravaged your mind"

Those creepy, creepy lyrics are the last thing I remember before my vision went dark and my memories go blank.