Bitter Sweet Symphony

You know the one that takes you to the places
Where all the veins meet, yeah

~~~~ One Week Later ~~~~

I was lying on my back on the stage of Avenged Sevenfold’s concert for that night just listening to my iPod and tapping my hands along to the beat. Currently playing was Whenever You Remember by Carrie Underwood. I just loved this song. It was kinda sad but I loved it all the same. I was watching has the lights moved around the stage and changed colors. The tech guys were going over the lights and such for the guys show that night. Making sure everything was working out right. And I was taking advantage of the quiet to get a little me time. And trust me I needed it. Brian was being overly impossible today.

But I was doing what Gena suggested. I was being civil and just ignoring his comments and the glares he was giving me.

It was hard but I was doing it for my sanity and everyone’s around me. I wasn’t pleasant when I was bitchy. Just ask Julianna who heard everything when I was bitchy.

I was humming along to the ending of Whenever You Remember when I was jumped on by Jimmy.

“THERE YOU ARE ALINA SWEETHEART!!!!”

Jimmy started to tickle me and I cracked up laughing and tried to push him off me.

Alas to say…I failed miserably.

“Jimmy Bear get off me!”

“Aw you’re no fun!”

Jimmy jumped up onto his feet and pulled me up with him and into a bear hug.

“I’m gonna miss you tomorrow Alina Sweetheart!”

I hugged Jimmy back.

“Aww I’m gonna miss you too Jimmy Bear. But it’s only one day. I’ll be back the day after tomorrow. I think we all need a break”

“I don’t I like hanging out with you Alina Sweetheart”

“And I you Jimmy Bear but the girls and I have had this day planned all week and I can’t back out now. Besides I need a break from…”

“Jimmy where are you?”

“…Syn…”

I growled this last part out and Jimmy took a step back and gave me a strange look. Just then the rest of the band walked out onto the stage.

“There you are Rev we’ve been looking for you!”

“Sorry I was getting a little more hang time in with Alina Sweetheart since she’s abandoning us tom.”

Brian snorted at this and went over to pick up his quarter and start tuning it. Zacky walked up to me and patted my shoulder.

“Let it go Alina. Brian’s just in a mood right now.”

“Yeah an all week mood” I mumbled but Rev and Zacky still heard.

Jimmy gave me a hug and then headed over to his drum set to warm up.

“We gotta do a sound check now Love so we need you to leave the stage”

I glanced at Matt.

“Okay I’ll see you guys after.”

With that I waved at them and went to go find something to do while they did their sound check. I ended up going outside in the slight breeze and sitting down against the wall and continuing to listen to my iPod and text Gena about tomorrow. The girls were out shopping for the hundredth time. I admit I wished I had the money to go out shopping like they did but alas I didn’t and it sucked. I was barely making ends meet with my job and college debt to take care of. And I wasn’t making a whole lot here seeing has how it was mainly and internship here. But Roger was paying me some money because I was working here for him. I just hoped when I got back to New York the money would be flowing in a little better so that I could help Julianna with the rent more.

I was sitting outside for I don’t know how long when I heard the door open and someone step out. I looked over to see Synyster Gates standing on the other side of the door lightening up a cigarette.

I had to keep from growling. I hated smokers. Not just because I was asthmatic but because it was just gross in my book. I hated the smell. But I was tolerating it for the bands sake. They just knew to take it away from me because of my asthma. I watched has he took a long drag from his cigarette and proceeded to blow it out into the chilly air.

“You know smoking kills”

Syn jumped about a foot in the air and looked over at me.

“Jesus Christ woman you scared the shit outta me!”

“One it’s Johnny Christ get it straight and two is sound check over already?”

Syn looked back at the door and back to me.

“No we’re taking a break. Rev and M got into a fight about a song or something. I wasn’t really listening so I left for a smoke.”

“Well that’s lovely but can you stand further away or go somewhere else.”

“Why the hell would I do that?”

“Because I’m asthmatic you idiot”

“Don’t call Synyster Gates an idiot”

I stood up and took a step closer to him.

“I call it like I see it”

With that he took a drag from his cig and blew the smoke right in my face and I kinda lost it.

I mean I didn’t mean to do it, it just sorta kinda happened.

I slapped Syn across the face HARD before storming into the building, slamming the door shut behind me. I made it to the dressing room before I let out a scream.

God he was impossible!

~~~~ Next Day –Spa ~~~~

It was two p.m. and me and the girls were sitting getting pedicures and manicures. We had already done facials and some sort of wrap thing what was weird but surprisingly relaxing.

We had talked about random things for the entire day. Mainly the girls talked about how much they missed their guys when they were on tour. They were also happy to be here with them. I just knodded my head the entire time and stared off into space a little.

I wished I had what they had.

“Hey Alina I think Brian likes you”

My head jerked up at the sound of his name. I looked over at Val with wide eyes.

“What!?”

“I think Brian likes you”

“You think him being mean to me is his way of showing he likes me?”

Val laughed.

“Yes and no.”

I looked at Val and motioned for her to continue.

“You see Brian always acts crazy around a girl he really likes.”

“You call this crazy?”

“Well yeah. He’s completely different when you’re not around. But when you are…he’s different”

“Crazy psychotic different”

“Well yeah”

“Oh great. He’s normal when I’m not around but when I am he’s crazy oh that just great. I make him go crazy. God I can’t wait until he leaves.”

“Now you know you don’t mean that Alina”

“Yeah we can tell you like him too”

My head jerked up for the second time and I looked over to see Gena smiling at me.

“What the fuck are you talking about? I despise him”

It was Gena’s turn to laugh.

“No you don’t. We see the way you look at him when he’s not being mean to you. We see the way you gaze into space. We know it’s him you’re thinking about. It’s SO easy to tell. Well for us girls anyway”

“Never gonna happen in a thousand years”

“Why? Because you don’t want it to? Or because Brian’s too scared to just come out and say he likes you?”

I looked up at Gena.

“Because I hate him that’s why”

“Whatever Alina well all know you don’t hate him. Maybe it’s time you admit it to yourself”

I slumped back in my seat and thought about what they said.

I CAN’T be falling for him. He was such an ass. And he would push my buttons just because he could. What the hell was that all about? I didn’t understand how they could think he liked me. It was oh so obvious that he didn’t and I was getting mad that they thought he did.

He hated me and I did too.

I hate him with a passion so strong it almost takes over my growing love passion for him….wait….WHAT!?

I shook my head and tried to think of something else.

I wasn’t falling, couldn’t be falling, it just wasn’t possible, wasn’t plausible.

It was illogical and I couldn’t have that.

I wasn’t falling for him.

He was a jerk to me and purposely made me feel like crap.

No way was I falling in love with him.

Keep telling yourself that Love