My Chemically Avenged Romance

-March 2008-

“So anyways… I was thinking. If it’s a boy… Brian Elwin Haner… The Third.” Brian smiled.

“Oh… dear lord. No Brian. No.” I laughed and rolled my eyes.

We were sitting on the bus, going through the list of baby names that Brian had written down.

“Aw, come on Sammy! Brian The Third! Synyster Gates, Jr!” Brian laughed and I smacked him lightly.

“Not a chance, Haner.” I laughed and then laid my head down on his shoulder.

“What’s the matter, Sammy Wammy?” Brian asked me and laid his head down on top of mine.

“I just want this baby to be born with my eyes and light hair… it will make my life so much easier.” I sighed.

“I know honey.” Brian tried to console me.

Zack walked on the bus and sighed when he saw Brian and I.

“So, what are you two like a couple now?” He asked with his hands on his hips.

“No, we’re just two friends having a baby together.” I shot, “And if we were a couple Zachary, it wouldn’t be any of your goddamn business!”

“Whatever.” Zack muttered and walked over to his bunk and climbed in.

“You should tell him.” Brian whispered and I lifted my head and shook it quickly. “Okay, fine, don’t tell him. It’s your life Sammy…”

Brian got up off the couch and left the bus. Zack must’ve heard the door of the bus close, because he crawled out of his bunk and walked back to the couch. He stood in front of me, with his hands on his hips.

“We need to talk.” He demanded.

“About?” I said, looking down at my fingers.

“You and Brian.” Zack said almost simply.

“There is no me and Brian…” I muttered. I didn’t want to have this conversation with Zack.

“Sammy… don’t lie to me.”

“I’m not lying to you, Zachary.” I snapped.

“Yes you are Sammy!” Zack snapped back.

“Zack… please.” I whispered. There was a strange pain in my stomach.

“No, Sammy… you want Brian, don’t you?” Zack snapped. I put my hand on my stomach.

“No… I don’t… I don’t want… I don’t want Brian.” I was feeling faint and the pain in my stomach was quickly intensifying.

“Sammy. Just fucking admit it! You got pregnant with Brian’s baby, just so you could have him!” Zack yelled and the feeling in my stomach became extremely painful and my sight got blurry.

“Zack…listen. I do not… want Brian… this baby… was an accident… this baby… it’s not even Brian’s…” I said and then everything went black.

---------------------

My eyes fluttered open and I smiled. The pain in my stomach was gone.

“Welcome back Miss. Sanders.” I heard a voice say on my left and I looked over. There was a doctor standing next to me. I looked around the room and realized that I wasn’t on the bus anymore.

“Where am I?” I asked.

“Lexington Regional Hospital.” The doctor said. “Mr. Zachary Baker brought you in…”

“Oh… what happened to me?” I asked.

“You passed out and then I saw some blood on your jeans, so I got you here as fast as I could.” I heard Zack say and my head snapped over to the right.

“Oh… thank you Zack.” I smiled at him and then turned to the doctor again, “So am I okay? Is my baby okay?”

The doctor sighed and then sat down and took my hand.

“You’re fine. Your blood pressure was extremely high and Mr. Baker said that you two had been fighting before you passed out. We checked you out and your blood pressure is back to normal.”

“Okay… and what about my baby?” I asked. I was scared now. He hadn’t even mentioned the baby.

“Miss Sanders… I’m so sorry. There was nothing we could do… It seems as though you were already experiencing a miscarriage and unfortunately the spike in your blood pressure caused the process to complete.” The doctor sighed and I felt my world crash down around me. I had lost my baby. I had lost Zack’s baby… and Zack didn’t even know it.

“I miscarried? My baby is gone?” I started to cry and Zack grabbed my hand.

“It’s okay Sammy…” Zack whispered and I just cried harder.

“I’ll give you two a minute alone.” The doctor sighed and left.

I looked at Zack and he sighed.

“Before you passed out… Sammy, before you passed out you said that the baby wasn’t even Brian’s… who’s was it?” Zack asked, looking me dead in the eye.

I looked down at my hands. The jig was up. I had no choice but to tell him now. I let out a deep breath,

“Yours.”

Zack’s expression was completely unreadable. His jaw was slacked and his eyes were slightly widened. He was just looking at me and not making a sound.

“It was m-m-m-mine?” Zack finally spoke.

I just nodded.

“How?” He asked.

“Stacie and Brian's Christmas Party... remember?" I whispered, still not able to look at Zack.

“Yeah…” He whispered.

“It was that night… you slept with me without a condom, Zack. Remember?” I sighed and Zack just nodded in response.

“We were gonna have another baby?” Zack whispered.

I didn’t know what to say to him. I had lied to him… there was no way around it. I hid the fact that I was pregnant with his child again.

“Zack, I’m so sorry…”

He just put his head in his hands and started shaking. I knew he was crying and I instantly felt worse.

“Zack…” I whispered.

“Why didn’t you tell me?! Why did you have to fucking lie to me?! Tell me!” Zack yelled and I had to stop myself from completely breaking down.

“I was going to tell you! I was about to tell you that I was pregnant with your baby when you told me that you were back with that fucking slut! I was going to fucking tell you, Zack!” I yelled back, tears streaming down my cheeks.

“So now this is all my fucking fault?” Zack shot.

“You know what Zack?! It is! It is your fucking fault! You continuously choose that fucking bitch over me and it’s not fucking fair Zack! It’s not fair!” I yelled and Zack just stared at me.

“What the- how is it not fair?” Zack yelled back.

“You wanna know why it’s not fair, Zack?!” I yelled.

“Yeah! I’d love to fucking know why it’s not fair!” Zack yelled.

“Because I fucking love you!” I yelled and then covered my mouth quickly.

“What?” Zack’s jaw had dropped.

Shit.