Status: Ongoing
Ain't Love Grand?
That Secret
It was late Summer when Alex came to me to tell me that they'd been approached about a tour overseas... and accepted. However proud I was of how far they'd come, I couldn't even pretend to be as excited as he was about the prospect of him being away in Europe for a month or two. It was hard enough when they toured on the same continent. I wasn't sure how I'd be able to cope with him being so far away for so long. At least when they toured in the States I could call him, even if it was only for a few minutes... but international calling was expensive. Still, I couldn't let my selfishness show too much. Who was I to bring down his mood just because I was going to miss him? I forced a smile and let him ramble.
"We're going to England and Germany and France and Sweden and Italy," he told me and I nodded my head and just listened, letting my painted smile grow wider. "Spain and Holland... Man, it's gonna be awesome."
"Sounds like a hell of a time," I mumbled, but somehow managed to sound a little more enthusiastic than I actually was.
He beamed at me. "I can't fucking wait!"
'I can,' I responded in my head and wondered for a second if I'd said it aloud; the thought was so strong. The way Alex was still grinning like an idiot told me that I hadn't. I kept up my false demeanor and asked when he was going.
"November," he told me. It sounded far away, but I knew it would creep up on us quickly. Time had a habit of doing that.
My smile faded slightly and I sighed quietly. "I'll miss you," I confessed, looking up at him.
"Aww," he exclaimed and wrapped me in his arms, giving me one of his secure bear hugs. He was far too hyper to read any emotion behind my words and just how much I meant them. "I'll miss you too."
I looked up at him while standing in his warm embrace. "Promise me you'll try to call? Or write? Or at least e-mail or something?"
He smiled down at me, nodding his head. "Of course I will. And maybe next time, when we're a little bigger, you can come with us." His optimism for the future made me smile, and I cuddled into him more.
I loved the thought of traveling with them, and the thought of the band growing in popularity so that he could go on living his dream forever. "That would be amazing," I almost whispered into his chest.
"We'll make it happen," he told me almost positively. "You've been behind me every step of the way and I want you to be a part of this. It'll happen, one day, I promise."
I grinned from ear to ear, realizing that he hadn't forgotten where he came from and that he was thankful for my friendship. I'd been right there beside him from the start, and his words let me know that he appreciated it. "I love you, Alex," I sighed quietly, closing my eyes and hugging him tightly.
If only he knew how much. I told myself that one day he would. When I was brave enough to face the truth, he'd know. I couldn't keep it a secret forever. It was already beginning to cripple me.
"We're going to England and Germany and France and Sweden and Italy," he told me and I nodded my head and just listened, letting my painted smile grow wider. "Spain and Holland... Man, it's gonna be awesome."
"Sounds like a hell of a time," I mumbled, but somehow managed to sound a little more enthusiastic than I actually was.
He beamed at me. "I can't fucking wait!"
'I can,' I responded in my head and wondered for a second if I'd said it aloud; the thought was so strong. The way Alex was still grinning like an idiot told me that I hadn't. I kept up my false demeanor and asked when he was going.
"November," he told me. It sounded far away, but I knew it would creep up on us quickly. Time had a habit of doing that.
My smile faded slightly and I sighed quietly. "I'll miss you," I confessed, looking up at him.
"Aww," he exclaimed and wrapped me in his arms, giving me one of his secure bear hugs. He was far too hyper to read any emotion behind my words and just how much I meant them. "I'll miss you too."
I looked up at him while standing in his warm embrace. "Promise me you'll try to call? Or write? Or at least e-mail or something?"
He smiled down at me, nodding his head. "Of course I will. And maybe next time, when we're a little bigger, you can come with us." His optimism for the future made me smile, and I cuddled into him more.
I loved the thought of traveling with them, and the thought of the band growing in popularity so that he could go on living his dream forever. "That would be amazing," I almost whispered into his chest.
"We'll make it happen," he told me almost positively. "You've been behind me every step of the way and I want you to be a part of this. It'll happen, one day, I promise."
I grinned from ear to ear, realizing that he hadn't forgotten where he came from and that he was thankful for my friendship. I'd been right there beside him from the start, and his words let me know that he appreciated it. "I love you, Alex," I sighed quietly, closing my eyes and hugging him tightly.
If only he knew how much. I told myself that one day he would. When I was brave enough to face the truth, he'd know. I couldn't keep it a secret forever. It was already beginning to cripple me.