Created

Chapter Twelve

We tried to forget. We really did try. I suggested baking together to help get our minds off things. That's how Mother and I forgot. We baked for hours and hours. It helped Mother, throwing her greif into every Black Forest Cake and Strawberry Shortcake and making the best sweets, so I hoped it helped Melissa and Adam. But it never helped me. Not then, and not now. I tried to think only of the cookie dough in front of me, but I failed. I stared into the chocolate chips and batter solemnly, thinking hard. Erik was dead. Adam's best friend was gone forever. Sadness gripped my heart and I beat the batter harder. Oh gosh, I was so confused. I didn't know what to do or what to think, especially about Adam. I had known him mere days, but I felt like we'd been friends forever. And I... I loved him. Or at least had a crush on him. I couldn't bare to see him in such pain. I looked over my shoulder, sneaking a glance at Adam. He was kneading the dough for something on the counter. I watched his facial expressions change; from thoughtful to sad, then to serious to sad. Mostly, he revolved around 'sad'. Sighing, I turned back around and tried not to cry into my bowl of dough. I wasn't sure anyone would want to eat these cookies. They were too full of sadness.
Then there was Arta. My grip on the wooden spoon tightened as I thought about her. Thoughts about Arta made me want to hit someone, preferably the girl in mention. She caused Adam such pain and I feared her. But with further thought, as always when I tried to think of Arta, my fear turned to rage. How could she?! How could she possibly hurt someone so much, and then kill and still consider herself human?! How could she live with herself, look in the mirror, get up in the morning!! My loathing for her was like nothing I'd ever felt for any human being. I wanted to demolish her for hurting Adam so!!! ...But I never could. I was too shy, too small, too fearful. And I did fear her. A lot. I shuddered as the memories of her hissing my name replayed in my mind from my dream. Swallowing, I tried to push the thoughts away, but it was difficult. How could I not think about it?
Another thing haunted my mind that day as well. Adam had said that the Assassins never came into a place with other people, but there were clearly lots of people in the hospital when they chased Adam and I...? Had Arta upgraded them? I shuddered. Yet another thing I had to push from my mind. I looked down, a bit surprised, to see I had almost over-beat the cookie dough, so hastily, I began setting it out on the cookie sheet.
I wondered about my dream. What was that all about? That Adam was... One of them? One of the Assassins? But he was... Human, right? No... I shook my head, confuzzed. Melissa had been talking about motherboards and wires and computer parts in Adam... What did that mean? Adam was obviously lying to me about something, and when Melissa tried to talk to him about it, he had become uncharacteristically bitter and cold. Not my sweet Adam. Now I really couldn't stop my tears. It was just all too much!! I dropped the piece of dough I'd been holding and gripped the table, shoulders shaking, tears falling. It was just too much!!
I heard Adam and Melissa behind me turn and gasp as I started to sob harder. I couldn't do this!! I wasn't strong enough for this! I couldn't figure out his secrets, I couldn't protect him all on my own!!
"Claire," Adam breathed heartbrokenly behind me and I felt his arms wrap around me. I closed my eyes weakly and rested my head on his shoulder as I cried. "Claire," he muttered again, holding me tighter. I was supposed to be strong. I was supposed to be there for him to lean on... "It's okay, we can do this," he whispered in my ear and despite my sorrow, I felt my heart beat a bit faster at the concept of him being so near. But that joy soon gave in to the helplessness again and I tried fruitlessly to stop my tears.
"I, uh, I don't feel good," I stammered stupidly through my sobs. Obviously I wasn't feeling happy-go-lucky right now. "Can I go lay down?"
"Oh, of course!" Melissa cried quickly, worry evident in her voice. She shouldn't worry about me. She had other things, bigger things, to worry about.
"Yes, of course you can, Claire," Adam repeated quietly, comfortingly. "Do you want me to help you to your room?" Oh gosh... He offered to help take me somewhere. Again, under the pain, my heart danced a bit, but I sighed.
"No, no, you stay here," I told him reluctantly. "Keep baking. It's helping you more than it's helping me." I didn't want him to have to go to the trouble, but he seemed just as let down as I was by my response when he replied.
"Alright," he said sadly. "Go lay down. And feel better," he added as I walked out.
"Thank you," I said, then stopped and turned back around before I could leave through the door and looked directly into his eyes. Those gorgeous green eyes that hid so much pain... I smiled gently at him and sincerely whispered, "Thank you, Adam." His responding smile was all I needed to feel secure and soothe my anguish.
* * *
I slept the day away and, luckily, dreamed nothing, but it really got interesting again when I got up in the middle of the night. I awoke to a grumbling stomach. I didn't want to leave my warm bed, but hunger drove me up. I knew we had cookies left in the kitchen, so I got out of bed as quiet as I possibly could, and padded down the hallway. And who should I find out of bed at one-thirty and staring groggily into a cup of hot chocolate but Adam. I joined him at the table with a plate of cookies and offered him one but he just shook his head. He looked absolutely exausted and his hair stuck up at odd angles. It would have been funny had he not also looked so broken. It was Erik, I knew it was. The happiness I cherised so much in him had left his eyes.
"I have to go," he said finally, breaking the silence. I nodded, understanding he was meaning more than leaving the kitchen. He was going to find Erik. I would, too. "Will you come with me, even if I tell you to stay?"
"Of course," I replied calmly. I was determined that he wouldn't leave now without me.
"Alright then, I won't even try to tell you to stay. And while we're here, and since you're coming with me, I'd better... I'd better tell you..." I looked up in wonder. Gosh, he must have been really sleepy! Or his fighting spirit had up and left. Both weren't the greatest possibilities.
"You're going to tell me? Everything?" I asked, wide-eyed. I wondered if I was ready for his story.
"Everything," replied Adam, looking grim.
"Why?" I asked. Adam looked up at me and sighed, but he smiled sadly. .
"Reason number one is the fact that you're coming with me. You need to know all you can about me and about Arta and Erik so you can help and can protect yourself. Reason number two is... I trust you. You may hate me, I suppose, but I truly don't think you will. You aren't that kind of person. I want to tell someone who won't hate me. I want to tell you. And I don't want to make you cry anymore, I'm sorry," I felt honoured, but I only looked down at my near-empty plate and smiled. Adam cared if I cried! And he was going to tell me, trust me!
"I want to leave tomorrow night," Adam said quietly. "So I'd better start telling you about myself right now. It's a long story."
"We've got all night," I told him. "Begin."