Don't Go

I just stood there staring at the door, 1b, my first class of the day was maths which I wasn't to bothered about, I took a secret liking for maths because it was the only subject other than music that made any remote sense to me, yet I couldn't see the point in going in for the same reason as always. I didn't want to enter a room full of new, unwelcoming classmates only to be judged by the length of my hair, or the colour of my clothing, or my height. I sighed. It was the same everytime I moved school.

The first few times were easy, I hadn't truely discovered myself yet so I felt hope that I would find a friend and I usually did, but happiness seemed to prefer me when I was on my own, I really was blessed with a curse and I would never forget that all I needed was myself to be secure and happy, especially after the incident with Lee.

Lee Malia, my best friend for two whole years, he had a similar taste to me with music, clothing, bands, he was even a similar height to me which made things easier when we were bullied, he was more confident than me so he would fight back all the time and tell them to 'fuck off and pick on someone their own size' He got beat up a lot more than me because of his fearlessness, but we always had eachother to rely on, I had his back he had mine, it was an easy friendship and I truely cared for him. But that was my downfall, I cared to much, I started to realise that I wanted to be more than friends, more than best friends, I wanted to belong fully to him, be the one he loved and I genuinely believed that he liked me too but I was naive and foolish.

"Hey man!" Lee spoke softly to me making me smile. He noticed this and beamed back at me in return, he had such a cute smile "You know where my room is bro, head on up and make yourself comfortable, I'll get us drinks and I'll be right up"
I nodded and proceeded up the stairs while he closed the door and trotted off to the kitchen
"Hey there Mrs Malia" I greeted her whilst walking through the door to the paradise that Lee called a bedroom only to discover her sucking at the carpet with the hoover.
"Oh hey Oli" She yelled over the loud whistling sound that was errupting from the angry machine in her hand "Make yourself at home sweetie, I'll be done in a second"
I liked Lee's mum, she had such a gentle and welcome nature towards everyone, no matter who they were or what they looked like. I never once saw her without her glistening smile, I let the corners of my mouth twitch up and plopped myself on Lee's bed, about being projected into the ceiling in the process, I had forgotten how much bounce Lee's bed could hold.
Lee trotted in barring two brimmed glasses of apple juice, he knew I had a weakness for the stuff, he knew almost everything about me, except for one thing. Mrs Malia exited the room, singing as she went and swishing her long blonde curls around her shoulders, she was very elegant, but not as much as Lee. Not to me anyway.
"So, what do you want to do?" Lee asked
"Uhm, I don't know dude, it's up to you, I could quite happily just sit and stare at your walls and be happy"
"You love my posters that much?"
"I love your room period" I stated glancing around, I really did, all of his favourite bands lay scattered across his walls in bright colour variations. Massive posters surrounded by smaller posters everywhere you looked, there wasn't an inch of paint visible because even the ceiling was coated.
"Mine would look similar if my pain-in-the-ass sister didn't keep tearing them down to wind me up " I stated scowling
"How is Alice? I haven't seen her at school recently" Lee took a sip of his drink and I mirrored his actions before answering
"She caught a bug, She's felt shit all week, come to think of it, even though she is at home, I have hardly seen her"
"Oh dear, I swear that girl is always ill, Oh well, tell her I hope she gets well soon"
"She does get ill a lot but I will tell her, she will appreciate that" I smiled looking at my favourite poster "I love that one" I said, standing up and jabbing a finger at it.
"Oli...."
"Mmhmm"
"Think Fast!" He yelled whilst pushing the back of my knees forward causing my to topple over on top of him making my cheeks burn because I was lying face to face with him. He laughed. I did the stupidest thing in the world..
I kissed him.
He shoved me away hard
"Dude, what the fuck?!" He exclaimed "You just fucking violated me"
"I-Im sorry" I stammered "I just- I thought- Im sorry"
"You creep! Oh god! You fucking creep!

I remember, I couldn't say anything, I just hung my head in shame and wished there wad some way I could wind back time. But the most painful part was the aftermath, he wouldn't look at me or talk to me and if I ever caught his eye by chance he would frown and look as if we was going to vomit. I had caused him pain and I hated myself for that. It was then I learned that I needed to be independant and have my own back, because I realised if you leave someone else to guard it, when they leave it's just an open goal, with people aiming at you from every angle.

I focused on a large object that was waving up and down in front of my face only to realise it was a hand. I blinked and glanced at the owner. He was taller than me, not that that was difficult, and he had short blonde hair with a long fringe that was infiltrated by a tone of shocking pink, his brown eyes were eyeing me up skeptically before a smile lit up his face. I took a step away from him.
"No need to be scared, I'm Sean" He said, overly confident, thrusting his hand out in a fable attempt to shake hands. I ignored this, I didn't want to be rude, but I didn't want to let my guard down either.
"Oliver" I stated.
He let his hand drop but his smile remained persistant, it was almost as if he was excited about something, but how could he be when he only just met me.
"Mind if I call you Oli?"
"Only my friends call me oli" Not that I have ever had many, I thought to myself.
"Well, consider us friends then" He said, it was more of a statement than a question but I let it go, I didn't want to make friends, I was better on my own, but I didn't want to make enemies either "You coming in or what?" He questioned. I just nodded and followed him in sucking in as much oxygen as possible. I wasn't sure what to expect, but what happened next didn't half take me by surprise.

"A-A-Alice?!?"