Children Of The Damned

Damon

It was early in the morning, around six, and awoke from a dream I wanted too badly to be real.

Why was I so unable to make her feel for me the way I felt for her.

In my mind, I replayed last night, the intimacy that was in the air, even though we hardly touched all night. Every time she spoke, she looked at me to gauge my response. Everyone seemed to be paired off that night. There was obvious chemistry between Tyler and Caroline, and Jeremy and Bonnie. Of course, Elena and Stefan were in love; everyone knew that.

And there was Ana and I, two magnets pulled to each other. Only she was still resisting it. I knew she must feel something. I wouldn’t believe it was all pure friendship.

I would be anything for her. I just wish what we wanted was the same thing.

I got in my car at eight and drove over to Ana’s. I didn’t even get a chance to knock on the door before her threw it open, a huge grin on her face.

“I made us coffee,” she said, holding up two matching travel mugs.

She looked absolutely adorable, wearing a blue beanie that matched her eyes perfectly, and a cream colored scarf around her neck and mittens to match under her leather bomber jacket.

She saw me giving her a once over and laughed. “Sorry, it’s freezing out here. Literally.”

She was right. There was still a layer of snow on the ground. Her nose and cheeks were already red from exposure to the cold.

“Get in the car before you freeze to death.”

“Yes sir,” she said in a mock somber tone, and shuffled to the car, doing a little dance of impatience when she realized the doors were locked.

I unlocked the door and opened it for her.

“Thank you, good sir,” she said, getting into the warmth of the car. I closed the door behind her and went around to the driver’s side.

Then we were off. While I drove, I reached across Ana and popped open the glove compartment.

“Put in one of those CD’s you got me.”

“Okay,” she said, pulling out the cases of CD’s and sifting through them until she found the right one.

She slid it into the CD player and hit play.

“You really are a big fan of The Smiths, aren’t you?” I asked her as “There Is A Light That Never Goes Out” played through the speakers.

“Hey, this band is life changing. I don’t care what anyone says.”

“I’m not doubting their…awesomeness? I was just making an observation.”

She closed her eyes, sipping on her coffee, humming the melody as she rested her head on the headrest.

Soon, she was asleep, and I put her mug coffee in the cup holder between us so it wouldn’t spill.

It would be so easy to lean over and kiss her that I had to clench the steering wheel to stop myself. I remembered what Stefan told me about waiting for her to decide what she wanted from me.

I wanted the choice to be hers.

When I pulled into the parking lot of the record store, I turned off the engine and looked over toward Ana, whose head had lolled over to face me in her sleep.

I tucked a runaway strand of hair behind her ear before shaking her shoulder gently.

“Mmm…are we there yet?” she asked groggily, her arms stretching until her palms lay flat against the roof of the car. Her body looked long, lean and graceful as she stretched like a cat. She yawned.

“Yes. And unless you want me to carry you, you need to wake up and open your eyes.”

“Uh huh,” she responded, her eyes slowly opening. She turned to me, grabbing her coffee and downing the remainder of the contents.

“Alright, let us be off!” she said with excitement, getting out of the car and doing another dance, I guessed because of the temperature difference between the heated car and the frigid outside air. I had forgotten the last time she had been so lively about anything. I was just glad I was here to witness this new change in her mood; glad that I could make her happy.

Walking into the shop, I was immediately hit with the smell of coffee that wafted from the percolator on the back counter behind the register. A girl with braids and a tie-dye shirt waved as we walked into the store.

“This is so cool!” Ana exclaimed as she looked around the room, her eyes lit up and alive like those of a child. The large space was filled with labeled shelves, carrying albums in alphabetical order first by genre, then artist and album. The walls were covered in various band and music posters, all overlapping and vying for space on the crowded walls.

Ana, like I knew she would, immediately went to the Indie/Alternative section and began thumbing her way through the various albums. She picked out a Tim Kasher CD after much deliberation. She spent a lot of time caught between that and the Bright Eyes album she didn’t have.

“There are t-shirts on the far wall too,” I informed her.

“But I already picked out a CD,” she said.

“It’s Christmas Eve. I’m going to get you whatever you want.”

After I had to insist over and over again that it was okay for her to pick out something else too, she finally broke down and picked out an Ugly Organ t-shirt. Apparently she really liked Tim Kasher.

When we got up to the front counter, Ana put her items on the counter.

“Did you need anything else?” tie-dye girl asked.

“No. I think that will be it,” I said.

We walked out the door and back out to the car.

Ana was laughing as she buckled her seatbelt.

“What’s so funny?” I asked.

“That girl was practically salivating all over the counter.”

“What?” I wasn’t following.

“Don’t tell me you didn’t notice that! Come on. She was pretty…I guess.”

“Was she?” I asked. I hadn’t noticed anything particularly special about her.

“Yeah. You’re honestly telling me you didn’t notice that at all?”

“Yeah. I guess I just wasn’t interested.”

Ana laughed again, and then turned to me in her seat, resting her elbows on the center armrest and putting her hands under her chin, batting her eyes in mock coy playfulness. If she knew the effect it had on me, I don’t think she would be doing it for much longer.

“So, mister,” she started, her eyelashes fluttering, “where to?”

“I think maybe we should get you something to eat.”

“Why?”

“You’re stomach is growling.”

And sure enough, her stomach rumbled again.

“You’re right. I didn’t realize how hungry I was. I guess I was just having too much fun.”

“Ana, you need to get out more often. I could show you what real fun is like.”

“Hey! I have fun!”

“No. I have fun. But I promise I will let you in on it sometime.”

“Well, thanks,” she said, still not too happy about what I just told her.

I pulled out lot he parking lot and we drove down the road looking for somewhere to eat. We eventually decided on an old diner that looked like it hadn’t remodeled since the 1950s.

“I feel like I need a poodle skirt and an extreme fear of Communists just to walk in here,” she announced as we walked up to the entrance. I held the door open for her.

Once inside, we picked a booth in the corner by the window and a waiter came up to give us menus. He was somewhat tall, with blonde hair and light brown eyes. He flashed a perfect row of pearly white teeth at Ana, and I resisted the urge to growl at him. He looked her up and down before speaking.

“Can I get you anything to drink?” he asked, completely ignoring the fact that I was sitting directly across the booth from her.

“Orange juice, please,” she said. She glanced up at him as she said it.

“Coffee,” I muttered tonelessly.

Ana smiled at me as the waiter left. I found myself wondering if she had really just been totally oblivious to his appraisal of her, or if she was just politely ignoring him.

“So, what are your plans for Christmas?” she asked me, while running a finger over the faux wood designs on the tabletop.

“I’ll probably spend the day with Stefan. Elena will probably join us. I suppose Bonnie might be there too.”

“I thought you didn’t get along with your brother.”

“We have an interesting sibling relationship. But there are rare moments of male bonding involved.”

“You guys love each other. I’m sure you have plenty of male bonding moments.”

For whatever reason, I couldn’t bring myself to form a rebuttal to her statement. Because as much as I wanted to disagree with her, I knew she was telling the truth. She could read me better than I would like, and it made me wonder if I was as transparent to her in all aspects of my character as I was for my relationship with my brother.

The waiter came back with our drinks moments later, and asked us (well, mostly Ana) what we wanted to eat.

“I’ll get the cheese omelet with maple sausage and toast,” she said. I ordered the same.

“All right. Two coming right up,” he said, having the nerve to touch her shoulder as he walked back to the kitchen. Ana’s eyebrows furrowed. I was glad at least she had recognized that the guy was practically fawning over her.

And who could blame him? She was beautiful. In the late morning light, her hair shone like strands of the purest gold, her gray-blue eyes seeming to light up even under the fluorescent lighting in the diner. Lost in thought, she stared at the window, biting her lower lip in a way that reminded me just how incredibly sexy she could be without even trying.

Feeling my stare, her eyes met with mine, and she flashed me a radiant smile.

“I’m glad we did this,” she said.

“Me too. We should get out more often.” I realized that may be construed as a very lame attempt to ask her out on a date.

“Sure. Maybe we could bring Elena and Stefan with us next time. I think they would enjoy this.”

So, with that it became apparent she just saw it as a friendship hangout, and not a date. Because the chances of her considering that a double date were unlikely. We weren’t dating.

When I dropped her off at the house, she leaned across her seat and hugged me.

“I had so much fun. Thank you so much!” she said, and then she was running to the house to avoid the cold.

Luckily for me, she was too concentrated on getting in the warmth of her house to turn around and look at me. I didn’t want her to see my face, because I knew I must be terribly easy to read right now.

As I drove away, I turned on my stereo, and had to laugh at what I heard:

“Split me wide open and look right inside
There’s so many things that I try to hide,
Oh, you see right through me,
You always see right through me.
Split me wide open and cut me in two,
There’s nothing that I could ever hide from you.
Oh, you always knew me,
You’re the only one who knew me.”