Children Of The Damned

Eliana

“Hey, it’s Matt…Look, I just really wish you would talk to me. I miss…us.”

I deleted the message from my phone, resisting the urge to bash my head into my desk.

In the light of the morning, January 1st, it was hard to believe that any of this could happen to me.

I had wanted to enter the New Year with a freshness of mind, and the security of my best friend.

Instead, I was more confused than ever. I knew that Damon would never push me to do anything, but that didn’t make this any easier.

I found myself warring with myself. A part of me wanted to run to the boarding house; to kiss him again. The other part of me dreaded this new development between us, and wondered how long I had been oblivious to both our feelings. Had we really been dancing around this subject for so long that I deluded myself into thinking we were only meant to be friends?

I couldn’t think straight, so I did the only thing I could do when thinking or confronting an issue wasn’t currently a safe or easy option for me.

I ran, away from my feelings and my confusion, longing to find the same peace of mind I used to find when Damon and I spent time together. I put on my Nikes and my gym short and ran toward the cemetery.

It was a foggy morning, and I remembered the mornings I used to come here during my summer visits to Mystic Falls, before my life had become so complicated, when I used to be just a child with no real worries. When I had just started to realize that my home life wasn’t like most kids my age.

I remembered the peace I used to feel walking down the rows of graves dating all the way back to the civil war. I remembered reading all the names on the headstones, seeing who was related to whom, seeing who had left children behind or husbands or wives.

I was reminded briefly of my strange dream, where I had been here with Damon, and the strange black crow.

As if on cue, I heard a caw from behind me, and I whipped around, my hand flying to my heart. And there was the hugest crow I had ever seen, whose feathers glistened an iridescent black under the weak light that managed to penetrate the fog.

Goosebumps prickled along my neck and arms, and I found myself turning on my heel, running back to the house.

When I was finally inside the safety of closed doors, I took a long, hot shower, scrubbing away at my body with a bath sponge and my favorite rose scented soap as if I could cleanse away all my dark thoughts by scrubbing hard enough.

When I got out I wrapped a thick, fluffy white towel around my body and combed out the tangled mess of my hair.

I suddenly felt very drowsy and unsure of myself. I was listless, feeling like I either needed to run a marathon or sleep for a good twenty-four hours.

So I chose sleep. I pulled on some sweats and a baggy t-shirt and climbed into my bed. It didn’t take me long to drift off to sleep.

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Damon

“What’s wrong with you today?” Stefan asked, only his voice wasn’t accusing as it usually was.

I sat on the leather couch in the living room, staring into the fire, throwing back glasses of my favorite scotch, afraid of whatever might come next.

“I kissed her,” I said before abandoning the glass altogether and going straight for the bottle. “I have a feeling that one was a mistake.”

“Give her time, Damon. She was used to seeing you as her best friend. That isn’t going to change overnight.”

He patted me on the shoulder and gently took the bottle of scotch from my hands, carrying it upstairs with him as he left the room.

As I slipped into unconsciousness, my mind played last night over and over again on repeat.

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Eliana

When I woke up, it was long past midnight. I was glad that my slumber had been dreamless, because I didn’t want weird dreams to deal with on top of everything else.

I found that I wanted to see Damon, but I didn’t think it would be a good idea at so late an hour.

So, instead, I lay awake in my bed, staring up at the ceiling and thinking of what I wanted.