Him, the one I loved.

I started off my day like always, getting slowly and drudgingly out of bed and dragging my feet to my kitchen and reaching into a cabinet to grab a packet of oatmeal. I always eat first thing in the morning, and I honestly don’t have a legitimate reason, I just do. Before grabbing a bowl I turned the coffee pot on. I proceeded to make my delicious breakfast and when it was ready, which was about 2 minutes, I poured as much coffee that was made into my coffee cup and sat at the island and ate. Smiling to myself I remembered yesterday. My new friend and how interesting he was. I haven’t been happy since Jason left but I can see everything turning around.
I washed my bowl and my cup and left it in the sink. I walked upstairs and out the front door to grab the paper. I always read the paper, if you don’t know what’s happening in the world how can you call yourself living. I went back downstairs and plopped down on the couch, I was just about to open the paper when I heard a knock on the door. It’s 9 in the morning who the fu- Darren.
Man, this kid was weird meet girls one day then show up at 9 o’ clock in the morning in on her doorstep. I got up hastily and walked to the door, “Why are you here…. It’s 9 in the morning.” I stated in a harsh tone.
“Well someone got up on the wrong side of the bed.” Darren said jokingly and smiled showing his one dimple on his left cheek, Jason had the same thing but on his right cheek. Just the thought of him made me want to cry. I forced a smile onto my face.
“You’re a weird kid you know that?” I asked smiling turning my mood in a complete flip. I couldn’t help but be happy when he was around. He was so much like Jason and I felt as if I’ve known Darren for a long time even though we just met.
“Actually, I thought it was normal to show up to someone’s house at 9 in the morning.” Darren said sarcastically. “But seriously, assuming you were an early riser I’d thought you’d be up and seeing as how much fun we had yesterday I thought I should come over today.”
I smiled at him, how was I not annoyed that he just showed up unannounced? I hate surprises, especially unexpected guests. Well we sat at my couch and I turned on the news. He tried making conversation, I shushed him. I watch the news then I’m free to talk he already made it so I didn’t read the paper. “That’s the today’s news, the weath-“ I cut off the news woman.
“Now, we can talk” I said smiling. He gave me a puzzled look, his eyebrows furrowed and his lips pursed in such a way that tell he was just thinking.
“Elle, I don’t get you. It just seems like anything you like you go all out for. You like being athletic so you are an amazing runner/ swimmer. You like current events so you don’t talk until you get your daily news. You take everything to the extreme.”
“Well look at you Mr. Insightful. Is being extreme such a bad thing? I like being great at everything that interests me or involved with it to the best of my abilities.” I say firmly.
Darren holds up his hands as if to surrender, “Not trying to fight, just stating what I see.” I give him a look of pure whatever.
“mhmm.” I say then just lay my head back on the couch, I’m still outrageously tired. I hear the door open and slam. “Elle, where are you!” calls a voice I know all too well. How in the hell did I forget to lock the upstairs door, why today of all days are both my parents gone. A pit in my stomach grows. “Get up!” I say and rush Darren to the bathroom to hide in the shower.
“Where were you yesterday, I waited for you at the falls for hours.” Ian said practically screaming in my face. Shit, I totally forgot about that. Shit. Shit. Shit. “You little bitch where were you?” my voice caught in my throat. I hate when he’s like this. I hate how Jason’s death made him so bitter towards everyone. I hate how out of everyone in the world I chose him to go to for comfort and now all he’s good for is making me feel like shit. He grabbed my hips and pulled me closer towards him in an aggressive angry manner. “If I find that you cheated on me yesterday, I swear you’ll be miserable you slut.” Tears welled up in my eyes. “WHERE WERE YOU!”
“I was running.” I whispered barely getting my voice to work. I should be used to this by now. We aren’t even dating but he’s very territorial, I went to him for help through it and he went to me and even though it might not be obvious at the moment. He’s a sweet guy. I try to avoid him when I think he will get like this.
\ “Running, of course always fucking running; you ditch me for exercise. Okay Elle, thanks.” He pulled me closer and became more aggressive. My heart rate picked up, I was scared. After a second Ian surprisingly loosened his muscles and let off a bit. “Just don’t do it again.” Ian said in his most calm and nice voice. He lifted up my chin and pushed his lips on mine. I stood there moving my lips just enough so he wouldn’t get angry that I wasn’t kissing him back but not to the point I would actually be trying. He pulled back and smiled. “I love you Elle, and I know we aren’t dating but you know how our relationship works, we rely on each other. I need you, and you need me. I just, don’t want to lose you.” Ian said lovingly and in the most sincere voice he could get out of those forceful lips. All I could do was smile.
“Ian, thanks for stopping by but you can’t be here when my parents get home, you know they don’t like you.” I said, warning him. He looked at me hurt and just walked away without even saying goodbye. I heard the front door open and close but this time he was leaving and not barging in.
The bathroom door opened and Darren stood there, with a look I didn’t understand. “How do you let him treat you that way, I was standing in there so close to go out there and beat his ass.” Darren said he had a hint of you are unbelievable in his voice.
“You don’t know him like I do. “ I said and look down at my hands. Darren walked closer to me and held me, held me like he cared not like he was angry. I let my head lay on his chest and I could hear his heart beating. “He was Jason’s best friend what happened to Jason made Ian bitter to everyone. I’m the only one he has and I can’t let him be alone. I don’t know what he would do if I wasn’t there to cheer him up in the smallest way I could.” I say explaining Ian to Darren.
“That gives him no excuse to treat you like an object, and that he owns you. As from what I heard you guys aren’t even dating.” Darren stated. With a I-pity-you look on his face. I furrowed my eye brows.
“I mean I am single, It’s just we aren’t a couple we are just there for each other in anyway one another needs whether that be sexually or just to have company. You’d be surprised at how Ian used to be. He was the sweetest guy. I am just trying my hardest to see that part of him.” I say trying to convince Darren what I’m doing is right.
“Do you ever think that part might not be there anymore?” says Darren.
“No. It’s there you just have to look really closely.” I say. Darren might be right I think to myself but he just doesn’t know the whole thing. He wasn’t there when it was Jason, Ian and I. He wasn’t there when everyone was happy.