A Sunrise On the East Side

I just wanted to sleep. I didn't think it was that big of a request. I hadn't been in a satisfying slumber since Michigan, and that had been slightly over a month ago. I thought that this problem would pass with time. How long could insomnia really take over someone's life? And I had found something -someone, more appropriately- that cured it. I guess that was only temporarily. I still thought that after acquiring that, I would start sleeping more soundly and through the night. It seemed like it could be that simple. So why wasn't it?

The crickets chirped restlessly outside, scattered all over the neighborhood with their music seeping in through my open windows. They were only restless because they, at least, got to take a break during the day. Even insects had it better than me. I lay in bed on my side and curled in the fetal position. My room was nearly pitch black, the moon far from full to illuminate anything. It was earlier than I would normally be in bed, too. It didn't seem worth it to stay up around the house any later when I didn't want to be awake at all. Especially with the day the minutes were creeping into. Midnight was coming soon and I hoped to find someway to sleep before then.

It always appeared to work out this way. Me begging for a small coma to take over. Listening to all the sounds of a late night. My eyes wide open with no chance of heavy lids any time soon. And then my phone rings. Even though I was frustrated, it had been a peaceful moment like it always was. The vibrating of the hunk of metal against my nightstand cut into the silence so easily and made me jump. Once settled, I spent a moment staring at the phone casting a bright spot on the ceiling above before actually reaching over to grab it. I didn't even look at the screen before unlocking it and resting it against my ear.

"Hello?" I grumbled, wishing it would be from being woken up instead of simply having to answer. I closed my eyes but knew it wasn't going to do anything.

"Happy birthday!" Jack screamed from the other end of the line. He was way too enthusiastic about this.

My eyes popped open to stare directly at the alarm clock in front of me. Lo and behold, it was midnight almost on the dot. I sighed without really meaning to. "Thanks, Jackalope. But you remember that I hate my birthday, right?" I inquired, rolling to my other side so I could face the wall. It would be awesome -beyond so- to be able to skip this day in its entirety.

Jack was laughing. "I do know that. And that, my dear, is ridiculous. Everyone is supposed to love their birthday and take advantage to cause mischief and get expensive presents and all that shit," he tried to convince me. His carefree and cheerful tone usually did the trick. Guess I found the one instance in which it didn't.

"Yeah, that's what normal people do," I agreed, openly admitting I wasn't quite average without fully having to say so. "What time is it wherever you are, anyway?" I asked, changing the subject. I had no clue where they were, but I figured it would be way too early for him to even think about being awake.

"Two in the afternoon," he replied. "It's already fourteen hours into your birthday here!" he exclaimed. He obviously didn't want the focus off of this horrid day. There was a voice in the background, asking if I was the one Jack was talking to. Away from the phone, he said yes before the other person replied. "Rian says, 'Happy birthday.' See! With so much love, you should learn to enjoy today!" he insisted, thinking this may actually work with someone like me.

I still smiled lightly at his words. "It's not that people don't continuously wish me a happy birthday. It's just memories. One bad birthday, and the rest of them suck," I explained with a small shrug against my mattress that he couldn't see. No matter how good the others might be, I still always dwelled on and looked back to the terrible one.

Though there was probably a ton going on around him, wherever the hell he was, whatever country he was in, he didn't get distracted in the least. He replied right after I had finished speaking. "I bet you would have a fantastic birthday if I were there. And then forget all about that bad one," he said, sounding sly and suave.

I snorted, the corners of my lips lifting up further without having to force them. "I probably would, I can't lie," I admitted, snuggling a little further into the bed. I was finally starting to grow tired. With my free hand, I started to pat around for Galileo so that I could cuddle with him as I slept. Even talking to Jack was giving me the chance to become sleepy. I wish I could say what it was about him that did this. He was talking again, but I couldn't really tell what he was saying. My search for the stuffed platypus I had carried around even long after I had grown too old for stuffed animals was coming up short. Slowly but surely, I began to panic. "Shit," I mumbled, sitting up and turning on the lamp on the table. Desperately, I started to hunt through my sheets again.

Abruptly, Jack stopped talking. He didn't even care that I had obviously not been listening and had interrupted him. "Kenley? What's wrong?" he asked, clearly worried.

I had to take a minute to answer. I couldn't find the sewn cotton and furry animal anywhere. To my knowledge, I could only name one time I had brought it anywhere else in the house. Yet, he wasn't here. It was so childish of me to overreact. I was freshly twenty-two and it was just a stuffed animal. But it was my favorite stuffed animal, the only one that had survived each plastic trash bag that went to Good Will over the years. My grandmother had given it to me and it was the only thing I had left because my mother refused to let me have whatever was left to me in the will. I needed to find him. And the more seconds that passed without this happening, the more tears began to build up against my lower eyelids. "I can't- I can't find my platypus," I told him, choking on the words. "Jack, I don't know where it is!" I was nearly hyperventilating now, tears streaming down my face steadily.

"Hey, hey. Calm down," he urged, his voice soft. He was always able to keep a level head when I was freaking out. He was there to make sure I didn't go absolutely crazy when something bad happened. "The last night I was there, the fourth of July. You had it in the living room. Is it still down there?" he questioned, attempting to make me retrace my steps from a month ago. How did he even remember that when I hadn't? At least he wasn't vocally calling me immature if that's what he was thinking.

I was already standing, having decided to double check the nest of pillows while I wasn't sitting in it. I had planned to drop to the floor and check under the bed. But he was probably much more in his right mind at the moment and he could remember when he had last seen the toy. I wasn't going to second guess him right now. I quickly exited the room and made my way downstairs, scanning the living room before I was even off the steps. The throw blanket that was always on the couch was crumpled at one end, piled a bit bigger than normal. It hadn't been moved in longer than I could think back while I was freaking out. Phone pressed tightly to my ear, I paced over to the couch and whipped the blanket into the air to land on the floor. As it parted from the cushions, out rolled Galileo.

I lunged forward to grab him. "Thank God!" I sobbed, clutching the plush animal to my chest. I was finding it hard to stop crying now, silently shaking with each tear that rolled down my face as I sat there. "Thank you, Jack," I managed to whisper. I wasn't sure if he could understand me. I was trying to take deep breaths so that I could maybe try again and make it clear. It just wasn't working.

In the back of my head, I was repeatedly telling myself I was being stupid and to shut up. Being verbally harsh to myself usually made me see sense so I could calm down. But I would be lying if I said I didn't need to cry. I hadn't in so long, not even at my grandmother's funeral. And it had been begging to get out, nearly winning during the confrontation with Jack. So it was overdue. The fact that I had been so scared I lost the most important thing my grandma had given me during my childhood wasn't helping with halting my tears and had only brought it on more strongly.

Jack was silent for a few minutes, all the noises surrounding him flooding the speaker of my phone without being spoken over. Somehow, I knew it wasn't because he was uncomfortable. Sure, this was way worse than the last time he had seen me lose it. But he was still on the other end. He wasn't hurriedly coming up with an excuse to go. Knowing that he was just letting me gather myself, I was able to do exactly that. To an extent, at least. I brought air into my lungs like I hadn't had it in entirely too long and wiped at the tears forming in my eyes still.

"Are you okay?" he questioned, keeping cautious in case this was only a short break.

I gave a nod in reply, forgetting that we were on the phone. "I'm getting there," I said once I realized my small mistake. "Sorry," I muttered, ashamed that I had even done any of this.

"Don't apologize," he told me, sounding demanding but supportive. "Damn it. You definitely have me wishing I was home," he chuckled, and I couldn't help but laugh lightly, too. "Do you need someone to come over there? What about Lisa?"

"She's in New York until tomorrow," I replied with a sniff, probably reminding him of something he already knew. She hadn't been in town much, not wanting to really deal with the separation she and Alex were currently going through.

"Kendra should be home," he suggested. I was sure he would go through all the guys' girlfriends, just to make sure someone could check up on me. I really was starting to feel better and didn't think I needed anyone to watch over me. I didn't want to tell him that though when he was being so protective.

I stood from the couch, tucking Galileo securely in the crook of my arm. Starting back up the stairs, I began to reassure him. "I'll call Shawn. He's awake and can be here in less than a minute," I promised, walking into my room. The lamp kept it dimly lit in a circle of yellow light. I climbed into bed, pulling the sheet back up over me once I had situated myself. "Do me a favor though?" I had no intention of calling my best friend. He wasn't who I needed right now.

"Of course, Kenley," he responded immediately. It should have made me apprehensive that he didn't think twice about this. But he already knew that no matter what he did, we wouldn't be more than friends. I was far too into this melancholy mood to protest anyway.

"Will you just talk to me until you absolutely have to hang up?" I asked him. "Just tell me story after story, real or fake. I don't care." I bit my lip, worried he would think this was crazy. Maybe it was another stunning display of my insanity tonight. It was my birthday. Let me be unhinged.

Jack laughed and it washed a new calm through me. "Sure," he agreed. He didn't let me down. Like our car rides always ended up nowadays, he talked and talked. He let me a little further into the brain I thought I had already known every turn to. He took me up on the offer to share made up tales, and he shared his obviously active imagination. Sometimes, I wasn't sure where real life ended and make believe began as he spoke. Either way, his voice lulled me to sleep and his words colored my dreams.

It was wonderful that I was able to dream. They were only partly good, but it meant that I was sleeping. A real sleep that I didn't wake up from once until the morning. It was abrupt like it usually was, but it was caused by the blaring of my phone that was stuck between my ear and the pillow. I groaned, slipping my fingers under my face to grab it. I had to hold it close to my eyes to see who it was, my glasses having come off in my sleep to leave me blind now. Sighing sleepily, I unlocked it and held it to my other ear. "What?" I whined. I pressed my face into the pillow once the word left my mouth.

"Get up, sunshine," my best friend demanded. "I'm coming over, so you need to get ready. And damn it, look nice for once," he joked with a chortle.

"Har har. You're so funny," I responded sarcastically. Regardless, I sat up and started to wake myself up. I glanced at the clock to see that it was only a little after nine before I swung my legs over the side of the bed to stand. "Why do I need to look presentable at nine in the morning if you're only coming over?" I asked, shuffling over to the dresser to put my contacts in.

"It's your birthday! Maybe I want to treat you to breakfast or something," he told me. "Now go!" With that, he hung up.

It didn't even phase me. I shook my head and set my phone down. I stood there a minute, still erasing sleep from my mind. It took a moment or two, not being used to waking up like a normal person, but then I was able to push on and head to the bathroom. I had showered before climbing into bed the previous night, thinking maybe it would help me sleep. Though it had done nothing for that, at least I didn't have to spend time Shawn would complain about not having. I still hoped he didn't expect me to be quick. It had only been a few minutes, but it was turning out to be a good day already and I wanted to look good as he had requested. I plugged in my flatiron and went to wash my face and brush my teeth, slowly doing my usual morning routine before I started to get ready for the day.

I wasn't alone in there for long. The back door could be heard opening, the suction from the rubber on the bottom echoing through the empty house. The screen door slammed shut and footsteps started up the stairs seconds later. Shawn burst into the bathroom without a second thought not even ten minutes after he had called to wake me up.

"What are you doing?" he questioned, one eyebrow raised. He seemed to think that I had never done my hair before.

"Uh, taking advantage of my hair growing and curling it?" I answered, letting it morph into a question right back to him.

"No, no, no. You're doing it wrong," he insisted. He came forward and took the flatiron from my hand, pulling it out of my hair. I had curled my hair a hundred times when it had been long, but I decided to let him do what he wanted. I was going to do as Jack said and take advantage of today and simple offerings.

Once he had finished and I had done my makeup, I changed quickly so he could drag me out. We met Jason at a small diner I had gone to with so many different people every Friday night of middle school. It was a typical Sunday morning for it now, and it was nice to sit in the quietly busy restaurant. Sure, I hated my birthday. I had good reason. It had been this day fourteen years ago that my mother confessed to her affair before packing up the car and taking Kegan back to her home state with me refusing to leave because I just wanted a normal birthday with my family. The chances that something that bad was going to happen today were slim, but I would still feel most comfortable with breakfast being the only event of the day. Considering Shawn didn't give me the present he had gotten me back in May -and well, this was of course Shawn- I had a feeling there would be more somewhere along the way.

I was being chauffeured around by the boys. It was like it was almost one hundred percent of the time when we hung around town, with me in the back and the two of them up front. But I knew they thought that it was more special today, of all days. I didn't protest to any of the things they suggested we do, whether it was to go to a deserted park so we didn't look like idiots on the swings or scope the mall for things we would never actually buy. It was a fairly typical day. If they wouldn't have been reminding me every ten seconds, I could have easily forgotten it was my birthday. I knew something was going on. They were just keeping me out to have me out of my house. It wasn't hard to figure out. I wouldn't ruin it for them though, they were so excited about it.

Nothing looked added or out of place when we finally pulled up in front of the house. I was able to breathe a silent sigh of relief, thinking I had jumped to conclusions about them maybe throwing a party for me. I slipped out of the backseat, hooking my arm into Jason's when he offered and let him lead me to the front door. I let them both go in ahead of me once I'd unlocked it and was already slipping my shoes off as I followed. They had already disappeared when I looked up again, but I heard that familiar suction noise once more today. I gave a light smile as I padded into the kitchen after them. It was the perfect kind of day to sit on the back porch and do nothing but be lazy. Not paying much attention, I pushed the screen door open to join them.

"Surprise!" more than a dozen people awaiting my entrance screamed.

Laughing appeared to be all I could do. My best friend threw his arms around me while I told him he was crazy for doing all of this. He chuckled and assured me that it was all my dad's idea. As soon as Shawn let me go, I was met with my father and I quickly wrapped him in a tight hug. Still giggling like an idiot, my eyes scanned the crowd of people that occupied our back porch over his shoulder. Lisa and Kendra, Kara and Annie, Jessie and Alexandra. They were all grinning and talking amongst all our friends that I had known forever and was reacquainted with by coming home. A little off to the side but still part of the group and mingling was my brother. This birthday was certainly shaping up to be much, much better than expected.