The Redhead, and The Dreamer.

I really don't want to necessarily be that chick, but today, when I accidentally ran into Ethan and Crystal in the hallway while I was skipping gym and saw them arguing with each other over something about some concert Saturday night, I got a little annoying pang of hope in the pit of my stomach that I had been waiting so long to feel again. It was kind of wrong for me to actually be thinking in that sort of way, and wondering if there was anything humanly possible I could do to egg on the fight enough to lead to a breakup of any kind, but I just couldn't help myself. It was one of those situations where there was something that I wanted so bad that it hurt sometimes when I thought about it, and the sad thing was, the main reason I wanted him was because he was one of the few males that I knew that wanted absolutely nothing to do with me. It irritated me, and interested me completely at the same time.

"You promised you wouldn't ditch me to do any stupid show this weekend." Cystal huffed. Her normal front of perfection was down for the count as she tossed her bangs annoyingly out of her eyes with a quick flip of the head. At the same time, she looked like she was about to cry too, and I smiled, peeking around the corner I was hiding behind, hoping maybe she would actually shed a tear or two. I'd never seen her or anyone like her ever show all that much emotion in my entire life. The thought of her crying was almost too sweet for me to handle. "It's our two month anniversary and you straight up promised me last week you weren't busy. I already made plans and everything. Can't you just get out of it, or have them get someone else?"

"It's too late to try to back out now." Ethan sounded unreasonably calm for some reason, and that only made me want to watch the drama unfolding before my eyes that much more. "Hell, I was the somebody else they got when someone backed out, and now I've got to go. It's a big thing here, and you know the big record producers are always there. It's my dream. I'm not going to back out now when I'm so god damned close to finally getting where I want to be in life."

My stomach dropped as soon as I realized what the gig that was important enough to miss their big two month date for was. The big Ribose Showcase was held in town once a year in the spring showing off local and semi local artists. Only the most talented got a spot in it, and it was nearly a guaranteed record deal if you performed decent. Music agents and producers all looking for their next big thing or buck flocked to the town and swarmed all the hotels and motels for a week or two, just trying to seal a contract deal with one band/artist or another. It was always a really fun thing that all the teenagers, young adults, and even some older adults too gathered from miles and cities across the state in the towns main courtyard to see, listen, and enjoy. There were always the stageless hopefuls who would bring their guitars, and their dreams and perform for the crowds before the show started and after it ended for hours, trying to get the attention of any passing music industry 'big shot', but it was rare they were given the time of day by anyone important. I knew. I had been doing the same thing myself every year sin I was fourteen, and still got nowhere, and now here was Ethan, a guitar junkie and a new kid back in town, and he suddenly had a spot in such a huge and demanding local event that was nearly impossible to get a place in. My jealously could have killed me, or him, if it somehow had the ability to become a tangible thing.

"I'm not going to back out now when I'm so god damned close to finally getting where I want to be in life." His words rang in my ear almost painfully. He was so close, and yet I was so far from everything I ever wanted. It wasn't fair.

Life never was.