You're Still an Innocent

Chad woke up to the light of the TV filling the room. He blinked a few times as his eyes adjusted to the light and he sat up. The clock above the TV said 2:00 AM. Bam was sitting on the other couch staring at the TV with a small smile on his face.

Chad turned to the screen to see what Bam was watching. Chad felt a smile spread across his face too when he looked at the screen.

‘He fucking woke me up by putting shit on my face.’ Ryan said standing in the bathroom of a hotel room in Iceland.

‘Well, get even or something.’ Bam suggested video camera glued to his hand capturing every second of their young lives.

‘I’m gonna fucking kick him in the face. I’m gonna break his nose.’ Dunn threatened.

‘No, just fucking…just fucking dump jelly on him or something.’ Bam replied.

‘Jelly?!’ Ryan asked laughing slightly. ‘The guy put fucking shit on my face and you’re talking about fucking jelly. I’m gonna fucking drop a brick on his head. I’ll fucking piss on his face. I gotta piss.’

Chad and Bam laughed as they watched as Ryan snuck into the next room followed by Bam and Jess and proceeded to urinate on a sleeping Dico’s face.

‘How old is this?’ Chad asked.

‘Like ten fucking years.’ Bam said. ‘I miss Dunn so fucking much Chad.’

‘I know, man. We all do.’

‘Like, why the fuck did he have to die?’ Bam said sighing.

‘I don’t know, man.’ Chad said laying back down on the couch.

A silence fell upon the pair of friends while they sat and watched the videos from their early twenties.

‘I’m all packed.’ Bam said ten minutes later.

‘What?’ Chad questioned.

‘I’m all packed.’ Bam said again.

‘For what?’ Chad asked confused.

‘For rehab, I’m actually going to go.’

‘You’re serious?’ Chad asked sitting up now. ‘You’re not fucking with me?’

‘I’ve been thinking a lot about what you said, and what my family has said, and the future, and Ry, and watching this, it’s all just made me realize a lot of fucking shit.’ Bam admitted. ‘Remember when we were in high school and I always swore I would never become that fucking alcoholic guy who can’t go a fucking day without drinking? That’s what I fucking became! And I’m just realizing now, I fucking hate myself because of it. That’s why none of my relationships have worked out. I hate myself.’
‘Wow, Bam.’ Chad said with a chuckle. ‘I don’t mean to laugh, but I’m really fucking proud of you.’

‘I really want to change Chad. I really want to get my life back together and start working. I was reading some of the things that my fans have been saying about me. It’s absolutely terrible. They’re all pissed at me and the person I’ve let myself become.’

Chad looked on in amazement as Bam poured out a piece of his soul to him. Chad knew not to get his hopes up yet. Addiction is a long a bumpy road after all. But Chad could tell that there was a piece of Bam that truly was ready for a change. He would just need a whole lot of love and support to gain the motivation to do so.