Savin' Me

"Soda," I let out in a breath. "Why were you eavesdropping?"

"Because I knew what you were going to do," he said, his tone angry, as he shoved away from the sink. "Didn't I tell you not to break up with him? Didn't I tell you that he's been through enough shit?"

"Didn't you hear him?" I shot back. "He said that he knew and that he was just hoping that I liked him. He understands!" Taking a deep breath, I let out a spiteful laugh. "You know what? If you're pissed off at my decision, then fine. Be pissed off. I might like you a lot and want to be with you, but if you're going to be a dick, then that's okay. I'll just find someone else."

"Zoe, wait," he tried to stop me, but I was already making my way down the hallway to my room. Shutting it loudly, I lied down on my bed and stared at the ceiling, trying to calm down my racing heart. It had taken a lot of nerve to say what I had to Sodapop, and I knew that, while I'd been right, it was not going to be as easy as I thought.

But the door opened about five minutes later, and Soda sat down on my bed, not looking at me.

"Can I help you? There a reason that you just burst into my room unannounced?" I shot at him.

"Please. I just want to talk. In a normal voice. No more anger." He looked over at me and saw that I was simply watching him, so he continued with what he was saying. "Alright, now, I'm not happy that you ended your relationship with Johnny. I mean, I love that you like me back, but he is kind of like a brother, and that wasn't easy, watching his heart get broken like that."

"I understand that," I mumbled.

"Good. That's what I was hoping for." He let out a sigh and leaned back on his hands, his eyes still in mine.

"But what does that mean now? For you and me? It's not like Johnny doesn't know that I broke up with him because I liked you."

Soda was quiet for a long minute before shrugging. "I don't know. What do you want to happen?"

"No way," I laughed, thankful that the atmosphere had gone from hostile and awkward to light and friendly. "I'm not making the first move on anything."

"Alright, then," he replied, standing up. "I guess I'll have to take matters into my own hands. PONYBOY!"

"Shut up!" I yelled light-heartedly, closing my door with my back. "I'm not after Ponyboy. Lily, however..." Wiggling my eyebrows suggestively, I let out a small laugh. "I'm thinking that some matchmaking is in order."

"You get right on that," Soda rolled his eyes. "But you should probably get your own love life squared away first."

"You think so?" I responded, genuine question in my voice. "Hm. Maybe you're right."

He was making his way closer to me slowly, and he finally took my face in my hands. "So you've stopped cutting, right?" he whispered, now completely serious.

"Yeah. When things get hard, I still want to reach for a razor, especially today, but I don't do it. Therapy's helping. And I have," I pointed my finger into his chest, "you to thank for that. So thank you."

"You're welcome," he smiled, leaning in and pressing his lips against mine very gently.

Even though the kiss only lasted a second, fireworks exploded in my stomach, and when he pulled away, I followed him and brought him down to my level so I could kiss him again.

His lips were so soft and warm, and I couldn't help but think that I should have realized that Soda was perfect for me right from the start. I wished that I hadn't led Johnny down the road that I had. Though mistakes were a part of human nature, it made me annoyed that I had made so many.

The door opened behind us, shocking me out of my happy daze. Soda and I shoved away from each other, turning around to face Darry.

His eyes were wide as he cleared his throat. "Um, I just wanted to see if you guys wanted me to start dinner yet...but I can see that you're a little busy."

"Um, I could eat," I answered right before the door was closed again, trying to break through the awkward atmosphere. "Thanks, Dar'."

He nodded, the tension still obvious in the air, before pulling the door closed behind him.

"Well..." I let out in a long sigh. "That was extremely uncomfortable."

"Oh, just a bit," he joked. After glancing at the clock, he turned back to me with a sad expression. "I gotta get to work, but I'll see you later, okay?"

"Sounds good," I smiled and watched as he hurried out of the room to change into his uniform shirt.

Throwing myself on my bed, I bit my lip and let a slow grin spread across my face, remembering the feel of Soda's lips on mine.

Even though I hated that I had to break Johnny's heart like that...I knew that I had made the right choice.

I was learning that life gave challenges, and for me, those were in the shapes of my abusive dad, cutting, and making the wrong choice with who I wanted to date. But I overcame them, which was more than I ever accredited to myself.