Love is a Pretty Tragedy

The view was stunning as Henry and I sat and watched the sun rise behind the large pine trees beyond the lake. Our bodies both slowly were becoming normal once again. After this transformation, I began to feel fully like me again, at least not experiencing pain anytime I moved. All the snow had melted away as today was one of the warmer days of winter. The blanket provided us a small burrow for just the two of us to reside in. I flipped over on my stomach and looked at Henry who was gazing at the sky slowly becoming brighter. I honestly never thought that we would once again be at our spot again; it was just what we needed at the moment. It made us complete.

We had barely talked since we had drove over here in Henry’s truck. Silence filled with a few kisses here and there, put me into a calm to truly listen to Henry’s side. It was his life and decision too, and I needed to stop arguing with every word that he spoke. “How long do we have?” was the first question that I had to ask.

Henry looked down at my face before focusing his vision back to the sky. It was slowly becoming brighter. “Edmund said that since you only took 6, a year, maybe more. He wasn’t really sure the side effects that it would have on you. Me,” Henry took a deep breath, “a couple of months at the most. The second round of doses didn’t help, but I had to do it.” A small smile began to grow; he had accepted it now.

I swallowed the thought of only a couple of months more together. My father had people out looking for a cure, anything to counteract the effects of the withdrawals. Both of my parents were in better spirits, most likely because Wesley was back. I could again just be an afterthought, which I was always fine with.

I was skeptical too. I didn’t know if they could find something so quickly of just a few months. “It’s all speculation of course. Edmund had found one of Shawn’s journals, and he had a friend, his partner-in-crime, according to Edmund, who met someone and decided to stop taking them. Neither of them knew there would be side effects until his friend’s powers came back sporadically.” Henry paused, as if he didn’t want to say what comes next.

“Shawn described that his human side completely disappeared until his vampire side did as well. His friend ended up killing the girl he stopped taking the drugs for.” I could tell this was a concern for Henry that the same thing would happen for us. He removed his arm from around me and placed his arms behind his head.

“Why won’t you take the pills then? We are finally together at last with no lies or a maniac to come between us.” The alternative sounded horrible, and this was the only thing standing in our way. I had to try one last attempt. I rested my head on Henry's chest. I focused on my favorite thing about his human self, his heartbeat and how his chest rose and fell.

He was silent for a moment. I didn’t want to look to him to see if he was angry that I had asked this question - especially since it seems to be something I bring up in every conversation.

“Thankfully I don’t believe you will ever have this obsessive behavior if you stop taking them, probably none of the crazy effects either. First, it was you. I had lost the love of my life, and my obsession brought back many memories for you that resulted in unneeded tears. The second time, it was killing Shawn; I know you noticed. I couldn’t stop focusing on training; it was much worse than before. Thinking of you was the only thing that could possibly calm me back down. I had to take them then, and it accomplished what we needed to do.

“With only a week of not taking the pills, I see my powers deteriorating much faster than before. I already lost the ability to teleport, and that took several weeks last time, not just a couple of days. If I take the pills again I know I will pick up a new obsession, and I already have a feeling what it will be this time. It will only be more intense this time, I know it.”

I waited for him to tell me what that may be, but he was silent. “You can tell me.” I urged him to say it.

He took a deep breath, “I found a box in Keane’s closet filled with items from my human life that I don’t remember. There are several pictures of a girl that I obviously used to...” He was afraid to say it, but he shouldn’t be.

“Love,” I whispered.

“I believe so. I don’t want to find her for that reason of course. I could only love you in this lifetime.” He ran his fingers through my wavy hair; I knew he was telling the truth.

“However, I can’t deny that I would want to find her and learn about who I was before - to just learn anything about my parents, or my dog, or any small tidbit of information. To see what her life had become after my tragic death; it must have destroyed her. I also have questions. What were my high school days like? Who was I before? Am I even somewhat the same person now?”

“Deep down, while I’m in my right mind, I don’t really want to know. I’m lucky to even be living this life and should not bother her. It would confuse her completely, and stop whatever progress she has made. Still I believe it will be my new obsession, just to see if I could do the next task. If I accomplish that I know that it will never end, and I can’t live my whole life like this.”

Hearing Henry walk through what he believed would be next, I finally understood. It wasn’t about me at all, even with me, I couldn’t stop this. If I continued to take the pills I wondered if the pills would do to me as it had for Shawn and Henry. What would I obsess with though? “You can’t, can you?” I finally agreed with him.

I raised my head and kissed his jaw before placing another one on his lips. “Thank you,” he mouthed. I kissed him once more before laying beside him. Henry was always the one doing whatever he could to make me happy, to do what was best for me, now it was my turn. It wouldn’t be easy; I couldn’t imagine ever losing him again. This time it would be even harder as I would know that he would never come back that there would be no second chances.

We lay silent for some more time, never could get enough of just being with each other. I wanted to help my father and the people searching, but I knew that I truly wanted to spend the rest of our time together just like this, not off in a foreign land, searching for a clue that may never be found. “I’ve missed this place; it seems like so long ago that we were here together.” Henry stated. It was true, that time seemed so long ago, a time when we barely knew any of the truth about each other.

I had been thinking often, if we had just been honest, none of the mess would have ever occurred. All the heartache, Keane's death, and everything in between would have never happened. Henry would have stayed away from all the mess he got into. Of course, it would go against logic to try to even begin to convince someone that you are a vampire. Shawn could have found someone else, and the same course of events could have still taken place, and the outcome could have been even worse.

"If you are going to take the pills, are you going to go back to Chicago or keep in touch with Aly?" Henry asked.

"I would want to, but I think it is best not to bring her in this world or go back." I raised my chin and looked into Henry's eyes. He knew all too well about that. "She has Ethan, who now isn't forced to be a vampire. She has her dream school, Chicago."

"It was your dream school too." Henry reminded me.

He was right for whom I used to be. It was no longer my dream to go there anymore. "Not anymore. My first semester was fine, but I was never truly happy. It didn’t feel like it was what I should be doing at the moment. Hey – I’m a vampire now after all so I guess I could pick school back up at any time."

Henry let out a slight chuckle – after all he did go to high school with us.

Henry’s eyes lit up as he raised my face to look into his. "I want to spend every moment I have left with you. I know I shouldn’t want to after what Shawn’s journal has warned us about, but until the moments where I am no longer human, I do. Not one second apart during that time." I kissed Henry and held my lips there, trying to memorize exactly what it felt like to kiss him.

I was sure I could kiss him for eternity if we had that much time.

"Let’s do just that, somewhere away from here though. Where would you like to go?" I wasn’t sure if my question was just hypothetical, if we would actually go somewhere, or if it was just what could have been - our lives in a parallel universe if Shawn was never in the picture.

"You know I want somewhere small." Henry would never lose his small-town ways.

I shook my head in agreement. I just want somewhere where no one knows us. "I want somewhere on the beach."

"Well we will do some quick research; maybe get a small condo on the beach where we can wake up to every sunrise. We will have drinks poolside, and make love every chance we get. We will learn about each other in ways we always kept secret." Henry’s eyes lit up at the idea brighter than I had ever seen them. "We will leave after sunrise tomorrow."

The spontaneity that Henry now was displaying was something I had come to instantly love. He wasn’t afraid to do anything now that there was a timeline. "Sounds amazing," I giggled softly at the thought. I gave him another kiss before pulling away to cuddle beside him. I closed my eyes and began to picture it all in my head, us happy, forever young.

“I’m completely serious, Estelle.” I sat up this time to make sure I heard him correctly. “Let’s run away and just enjoy this time. I’ve accepted it, and I want to make the most of it. I was extremely lucky to even get the chance to fall in love with you in the first place. It was short-lived, but it was more than I could have imagined. It is more incredible that what most people get to experience in their entire lives.” Henry’s eyes locked with mine as he flashed his half smile.

“I’m sure there is a cure; Shawn must have known of something. They didn’t find it in time for his friend, but Edmund had said that he had spent some time looking, before he was obsessed with me, that was his other obsession. I think that is where they will pick up from as I told your brother. With the two clans working together, they have to come up with it. They will find something to save you. I don’t know if it will be in time for me...”

“Don’t say that!” I knew it was most likely the truth, but we didn’t know. For now we should believe that there was hope. My brother had never let me down before.

“I made a stupid mistake to get involved with Shawn, and it was all because I was not honest with you about who I was. I should have questioned the pills that he was making me take, or the new powers that they were giving me, my obsession. I should have just asked questions, instead of just taking things how they were. I should have gone to Keane sooner as he was ready to help. I should have done many things, but here we are. I made decisions that I believed were sacrifices for your happiness that now have consequences.”

“We’ll go, and live the next how many months in complete bliss through the difficult times or the happy ones. It will be hard with everything that will happen, but I’ll help you until I can’t anymore. However, I will never stop loving you no matter what happens.” I swore that this was the truth that I could live by no matter how long I lived.

Henry placed a sweet kiss on my lips before a smile light up his face. “I never doubted that, babe. You make me so happy in every moment that I spend with you; it would be selfish of me to ask for an eternity of that happiness.” He flashed his famous smile, and I had to kiss it, to remember what that smile felt like on my lips. I pulled away to study every aspect of his face, as I sure I would do every day, that I didn’t want to forget anything. The way he smelled of strawberry ice cream or the way his voice sounded when he called me babe, none of it would I forget.

“Our love has never been simple has it?” Henry spoke; however, it wasn’t a question I was supposed to answer.

“I don’t know how I would describe it.” I admitted. I wondered where this topic was going.

“I do; I could write a book on us.” Henry teased.

“Oh you could, Mr. Famous Writer now or something?” I mocked back.

“Yeah, it’s a pretty tragedy.” Henry’s tone was serious. “The pretty part is only because of you though.” He was back in that one moment. In that moment, we were transported back in time, but it was better this time.

“Well, I guess you aren’t too bad yourself...”

“Hey!” Henry exclaimed. “I take serious offence to that. I’ve been working out non-stop, and I’m just not bad.” Henry grabbed my sides, and I knew it was coming. “You’re lucky that it is cold, or it would be the lake.”

“Don’t,” I warned him as I quickly sat up; however, that was not enough to stop Henry from tickling me from until sides hurt and small kisses between each attack.

“Let’s just stay in this moment forever.” I whisper into Henry’s ear as I placed a small kiss. “That’s one of your powers isn’t?” I teased.

“Maybe we work together at trying to freeze time.” He joked. I let out a sigh knowing the thought was much too good to be true.

“Well, I believe we have some research to do before tomorrow Mr. Owens.” I stood up and reached out my hand for Henry to take. He took my hand and stood up while instantly picking me up in his arms in one swift moment.

“I never carried you bridal style, Mrs. Owens. I apologize.” He bowed his head.

He carried me like this to his car before setting me down. We both took a second to look out. Our fingers intertwined, and I rested my head on his shoulder as we stood in silence taking in our last moment at our spot.

We didn’t say that we would never come back, but with our recent conversation I was almost positive. If he was gone, I could never come back here without him. There were too many memories as I stood taking them in: the slight breeze that rustled my hair and the grass, the trees and how they broke up the skyline, the still water and the tire swing moving back and forth are all things I will never forget. Somehow we had kept it a secret this whole time; no one had ever found us. I secretly hoped that another teenage couple would fall in love here like we did. That they would spend hours on the tire swing laughing and having deep talks. That maybe we would live through them in a way.

I took a deep breath as I looked at Henry; it was bittersweet for both of us as I felt my eyes start to water. I let go of his hand before walking over to the other side his pickup truck and hopping in like the old days. He popped in the CD that I had made him last summer, and we headed down that dirt road one last time.