Paper Bags and Plastic Hearts

“You’re crazy. You’re absolutely crazy.” Andy shook his head in disbelief.

“I’m not crazy. I’m right,” I corrected.

He snorted. “In what universe is Spiderman better than Batman?”

“Andy, Spiderman jumps tall buildings.”

“Batman has a utility belt.”

“Spiderman shoots webs out of his wrists.”

“Batman has the Batmobile.”

“Spiderman doesn’t need any transportation. He hangs off his webs.”

“Oh, come on. Spiderman’s a total wuss. Peter Parker does nothing but whine about being a superhero all the time.”

I laughed. We’d been on the superhero topic for quite a while now. Dash-Mart was fairly busy earlier that day but now it was completely empty. I was sitting on the stool behind the cash register while Andy was leaning on it across from me.

“Batman has a cape but he can’t even fly. I mean, what is up with that?!”

Andy rolled his eyes. “He glides.”

“Batman is human, Andy. He has no superpowers and he relies on his gadgets.”

“But that just means he’s smart. He doesn’t rely on a source of power like Superman does with the sun or Green Lantern and his ring. He saves the day with his weapons and fighting skills.”

“Exactly. He’s nothing without his gadgets,” I laughed. “And plus, Spiderman has Mary Jane. Who does Batman have?”

“Robin,” he answered smartly. Then he paused, looking pensive.

I hung my head back and laughed. “Oh, that’s excellent.”

Andy groaned.

“Face it, Andy. Spiderman is way cooler than Batman.” I crossed my arms.

“No, wait. What about Catwoman? She’s got the hots for Batman.”

“They’re enemies.”

“Not quite. They have a sort of love-hate relationship,” Andy said with a clever smile. “So, ha.”

I rolled my eyes. “We’ve carried on with this superhero conversation for far too long.”

“Oh, you’re just pissed I made sense,” he laughed. “Everyone thinks Batman and Catwoman are adversaries but they really do like each other.”

“They’re so dysfunctional.” I shook my head.

“Yeah, but they put the fun in dysfunctional,” Andy winked.

I rolled my eyes and looked down at my arm, which was covered in a long sleeve. It was throbbing a tiny bit. Serpent had done a pretty malicious job and I was pretty sure it’d leave a scar. Nurse Dolores had wrapped up a part of my arm with gauze and it looked like I’d been in some sort of serious accident.

My mom was pretty shocked when she saw my arm when I’d gotten home. She threatened to talk to Serena’s mom and all that jazz but I convinced her not to. Things would only get worse between me and the bitch and I sure as hell wasn’t looking to get expelled or suspended from school.

I lifted up the sleeve of my shirt just a little and that’s when my arm caught Andy’s eye.

“What happened?” He asked, frowning.

“Oh, this bitch tripped me at school,” I replied with a shrug.

“On purpose?”

I snorted. “Of course.”

He made a face.

“Her name’s Serena and she’s the biggest skank at my school. I hate her and she hates me.”

“Why?” He laughed a little.

“Oh, we go way back. In Junior High, we were actually friends. Not best friends, just good friends. Anyway, she once told me she had a crush on this guy in our English class named Jason Brooks and she was hoping he’d ask her to prom. I actually hated the kid but I never said anything. And then one day, me and her were sitting in class and Jason comes up to us and starts talking about the prom. I really thought he was gonna ask her but, to my shock and Serena’s, he asked me instead.”

“Crap. I’m guessing she didn’t take it very well?”

“Nope. She was beyond pissed. She started calling me names and said she didn’t wanna be my friend anymore. I didn’t even get a chance to reject the guy cause he got scared of her little outburst and walked away.” I laughed. “It was the most stupidest thing ever. And after that day, she started ignoring me and got into a new group of friends. Before I knew it, she had dyed her hair blonde and started wearing short skirts. And, as if that wasn’t bad enough, she would constantly talk shit about me behind my back and spread ridiculous rumors.”

“But it wasn’t even your fault. Just because some dude she liked asked you to prom, she’s been your enemy ever since?” He arched a brow.

“Well, one more thing happened,” I shrugged. “Before all that drama, she’d lent me a shirt. It was actually one of her favorites. It was white with some sparkly shit on it and it was also really expensive. And uh, after her bitch fit, I got pissed and wanted to get back at her in some way. So I, um……”

“What?” He pressed.

I bit my lip. “I might’ve laid the shirt out in my driveway and ran my bike over it, leaving muddy tire tracks. And I also might’ve let the neighbor’s dog do its necessities on it before stuffing it in an envelope and mailing it to her house.”

Andy’s mouth gaped. “Are you serious?”

“Yep.” I grinned.

“Wow,” he said, shaking his head in disbelief. “Remind me never to piss you off.”

I laughed. “Revenge really is sweet.”

“So what happened after she tripped you?”

“I was dead set on smashing her face in but my friend Lacey stopped me,” I sighed theatrically. “She’s one of those ‘violence is not the answer’ people.”

“So this chick messed your arm up real good, huh?” He eyed the gauze.

“I didn’t really think the gauze was necessary. It was just a scratch…which bled quite a lot.” I shrugged. “But the school nurse insisted.”

“Does it hurt?”

“Nah. It actually itches a little,” I laughed.

“Oh, that sucks.”

I nodded, resting my cheek on my palm. I was so tired. I’d really thought about calling in sick for work today but when I thought about Andy and how he’d be alone, I decided otherwise. And plus, I was his driver.

I reached for my hair and twirled it all around, creating a really messy bun. As I did, my eyes landed on Andy’s nametag, which oddly, had the number 6 drawn in black right next to his name. I narrowed my eyes confusingly and leaned forward to check it out up close.

Andy gave me a funny look. “What’s wrong?”

“What’s that 6 next to your name?” I questioned.

Andy looked down at his nametag and chuckled. “Nothing. I was just screwing around with a permanent marker.”

“Why 6?” I furrowed my brows.

“It’s kind of a nickname.” He shrugged. “I’ve always been a fan of Mötley Crüe.”

“Oh, Nikki Sixx, huh?” I laughed. “That’s awesome. Nikki is beast.”

“Indeed, he is.”

“And, oh, now I see where your sense of style comes from.” I smirked.

He laughed before doing a hair flip.

God, why does my heart always skip a beat whenever this kid does hair flips?!

“Hey, I got good news,” he said suddenly, snapping me out of my trance.

“Do share.”

“I’m getting my car back tomorrow.” He grinned. “You’ll no longer have to be my chauffeur.”

“Oh? That’s cool.” I smiled. “I won’t lie, though. I like driving you around. It’s fun.”

“Aww! Fawwah woves me,” he teased, batting his eyelashes.

I rolled my eyes. “Stop being a dork.”

He grinned and rested his arms on top of the register. “So, planning on getting back at the girl who screwed your arm up?”

“I don’t know. If I do, I’ll have to think of something really good. Like really really good.” I shook my head.

He laughed. “You can always dump pig’s blood all over her.”

This caused me to laugh out loud. “And go full on Carrie on her ass? That sounds cool but then where the hell would I get the blood? I’m not killing a defenseless little piggy. That just goes against my principles.”

He shook his head. “Yeah, you’re right. I’m not so good with revenge.”

I grinned. “I’ll let you know when I think of something good.”

“Okay,” he laughed.