Billie Joe Armstrong Is My Step-Father...and I Hate It

I felt consciousness creep into my body slowly, and I twitched my fingers slightly bnecause they felt numb. All I could see was black. I wondered where I was. I just hope when I wake up, I don’t see Billie Joe. I weakly opened one eye only to have my dreams crushed like a car being destroyed in a junk yard because Billie was standing over me. He was all I could see.

“She’s up!” he exclaimed loudly. I cringed at his voices volume before glaring at him. “Oh... sorry, was that too loud?”

“Yes, you dick” I muttered, shutting my eye again and tried to pull myself up. He tried to help me but as soon as he touched me, I sprang up and slapped his hand away from me. I scowled at him before gazing around. Tracy ran through the door.

“Oh, God, are you alright? I told your mother is might’ve been a bit soon to tell you that” Tracy told me, shoving her soon to be brother-in-law out of her way.

“You never stopped telling us that the whole thirty seconds she was down” I heard Billie mutter and he gave her a rather... awful hand signal behind her back. I could see the bitterness between Tracy and Billie when Tracy walked through the front door a few hours ago. They just wouldn’t mix at all.

“Are you alright?” mum asked from the other side of the sofa.

“Yea” I said. I noticed my mothers guilty and sorry expression. I could tell, in her head, she was pinning this on herself. I wouldn’t have that. “I was just feeling a little bit sick all day anyway” I lied.

“Oh... do you think you caught that twenty four hour virus that Joey had?” mum asked.

“Viruses?” Tracy whipped her head around to look at Joey, who was wandered somewhere away from me. “What was it like?”

“Shit” he muttered. “Really really shit, all I could do was throw up.” Tracy stared at him for a while longer before looking at me.

“She doesn’t have a temperature...” Tracy said, placing a hand on my forehead.

“It might be my time of the month” I said, trying another excuse.

“That’s exactly what it is” Tracy said, snapping her fingers. “Remember when we were at high school, Sammie? You fainted during your English assignment coz of your period?”

“Jesus Christ, Tracy. There’s guys in the room” mum replied, rolling her eyes. “Don’t just go yelling the word!”

“Go get water” Tracy ordered Billie. Billie nodded then scowled at her when she turned her head before leaving. I wish I could do that to him.

“Maybe you should lie down in bed” mum said.

“I’ll be fine, I’m just gonna check” I said, getting up. I swayed on my feet a bit but managed to move. In the hallway I met Billie.

“You don’t need this?” he asked, pointing to the glass of water in his hand.

“No, but I want it” I said, taking the glass off him and gulping it down before handing it back to him.

Tracy stayed for a while longer before she left. Mum and Tracy shared their gushy goodbyes and Tracy and Billie shared their slightly cold ones. Then Tracy was gone. I stood at the living room door.

“God, she’s irratating” mum muttered when the door closed behind her sister. Billie didn’t take any chances to agree but only laughed at her. “She loves to talk about herself, my own kids and... oh Jesus Christ, why is she here?”

“Maybe coz you have good news... two of them” Billie said, hugging her from behind, his arms wrapping around her stomach. Mums eyes fell to where his arms are.

“Yea... it’s gonna be a girl. It’s gonna be a girl and we’re gonna call it Lillith” she said.

“Lillith?”

“I like that name. It sound vintage” mum said. “I was almost going to call Grace that but Tony put up such a fight about how he always wanted a little girl called Grace.”

“Well, I can’t really picture Grace with another name...” Billie said to her, trailing off in thought. “Maybe Alex though...”

“You shut up, we’re not calling a girl Alex. I hate the name Alexandra” mum hissed. “It WILL be call Lillith. She will have black hair and brown eyes and she’ll be beautiful because she takes after you.”

“Don’t be so sure. If she takes after you, she’ll be stunning” Billie told her. “And what makes you think it’s a girl?”

“It better be. There’s four boys in this house right now and only three girls.”

“Actually, there’s three boys, I’M not a boy” Billie said. “I’m too old to be one anymore.”

“Don’t be an idiot, you’re still a little boy inside” mum said. I had enough listening and decided to jump in.

“Lillith?” I asked.

“Yes. Or Naamah” mum said. Me and Billie stared at her.

“What?”

“Naamah. They’re both names from that myhtology of the Angels of Prostitution” mum said, as if it were naming her Aphrodite. A silence fell.

“They’re WHAT?” I asked, blinking.

“Or maybe Athena...” mum said. “I like Athena...”

“Where are you getting these from?” Billie asked her.

“Mythology, duh. I want her to have a really... unique name” mum said. “But not like that freaky names celebrities name their kids like... Petal. No, I want my kid to have an awesome name.”

“Well, call her Naamah and she’ll be a laughing stock” I told her. Mum made a face of thinking.

“Ugh, maybe you’re right Gracie...” She detatched herself from Billie. “Lillith it is.”

“What if it’s a boy?” Billie asked her, following her into the kitchen. I stayed there, before walking back into the living room.

“Y’know, Lillith is a nice name...” Joey said softly, in a wondering tone. I looked at him before drawing my attention back to the t.v.

An hour later, mum was still cooing over baby names. Sitting at the dinner table was no exception.

“What about Eve? Eve is a nice name” mum said. “Oh, maybe Dana.”

“Not once have you mentinoed a boys name” Billie said, looking at her. Mum shrugged.

“Finn” she said, placing both her hands on the table. “If it’s a boy, it shall be called Finn. Oh! Another girls name, Eris!”

“Would you please stop naming Greek goddesses, mum?” I asked.

“Fine. Mariana.”

“Do we have to call it Finn?”

“Yes, if it’s a boy, he’ll be called Finn. But I’m really passionate about Lillith, I hope it’s a girl” mum went on. It never seemed to stop. Suddenly, the subject changed.

“I need a dress” mum said, suddenly tearing the baby names subject away. “And Tracy is taking me, out of all the people. She’ll want me to have a huge gypsy dress or something.”

“Why can’t Dianne take you?” I asked. “She’s coming up in a week as well to meet... him.” I looked up sourly at Billie Joe before looking at my food again.

“Good idea, she always looks really nice” mum said. Dianne was my dads sister, and she always looked stunning. “I’ll ask her when she comes up.”

“Is this Dianne person another sister of yours?” Billie asked.

“No, she’s my sister-in-law.” Billie looked confused.

“What?”

“Tony’s sister.”

“... oh.” Billie looked down, occupying himself with his food. I smirked before scooping up some of my chinese take away. Hollie had fries.

“Can your dress be pink, mommy?” she asked.

“Wha- it has to be white, Hollie” mum said, looking at her. “OH!” Mums cry made the rest of us six jump suddenly and stare at her. “I’ve had this awesome idea!”

“And you had to give us a heart attack to tell us?” Joey asked.

“Hollie should be our flower girl! We’ll give her a nice dress and she can skip up the aisle and throw flower petals in front of her and-!”

“What can I do?!” Kage ordered, looking pissed off than he was the only one of mums children not doing anything. “I’m not gonna sit there and do nothing!”

“I’ll think of something Kage, don’t worry” mum told him. “Anyway, would you like to be the flower girl, Hollie?”

Hollie burst into fits of giggles. “Yea!” Mum grinned at her response.

“This is going to be perfect” she told Billie. “It’s going to be perfect.” She looked at me. “You’re gonna show up. You’re gonna show up and you are going to smile like you’ve never smiled before.”

“What’s there to smile about, you making the worst mistake of your life?” I asked. Mum scowled at the stain I was leaving on her perfect plan. “Alright, fine, jeez, I’ll smile.”

“Let me see it” she said. A silence fell.

“Is that nesscar-?”

“Yes, let me see it.” I smiled half heartedly at her. “No way. I want you to look so optimistic, it can cure cancer” mum ordered. I sighed before putting up a grin so wide, it hurt my mouth. “Perfect.” I dropped my face to an awful scowl before playing with my food.

“Afrodita, there’s a good name!” mum said. I rolled my eyes and just kept eating.

This week just kept getting worse. But by the chances it’s looking at, it’s about to get a whole lot worse than this.