These Words Are My Heart and Soul

I laid in bed, whilst Frank messed about in the bathroom. Dwelling on the past is such a horrible thing; and I was dwelling on earlier that Thanksgiving day.

Cariad had shot up as Gerard entered the room.

“What in God’s name is he doing here?”

She was a very Christian person, having had Christian parents and Christian foster-families. So it really meant something for her to use the Lord’s name in vain.

“What is it with you two and Gerard? Jeez…” Frank had mumbled.

My eyes, having made friends with the floor, shot up and I gave a pleading look to Cariad. She had returned my look, but sat back down in defeat. My sister hadn’t said anything, but had gone a bit thin lipped and quiet at Gerard’s presence.

We’d all got really drunk. Apart from Erryn, obviously, and I’d resisted taking in a massive amount and just settled for a few.

So, lying in bed as Frank continued his hour long shower-a-thon, I was practically sober.

Gerard was sleeping on the couch. I tossed and turned, trying to put his image out of my head. It was so hard to think of anything else when he was there, in my house. He was passed out from the amount of alcohol in his system.

He’d been watching us. Frank had repeatedly brushed the hair off my face and kissed me beautiful, melting me into the couch slowly but surely, and more each time. The couch on which Gerard was sleeping. God, the way he’d looked at us when we were kissing was… heartbreaking.

Frank wandered in and jumped on the bed, snuggling into my neck and groaning slightly.

“You’re drunk…” I mumbled.

He nodded and sniggered lightly.

“Yesh, that I am, dearest.”

This made me smirk.

“Well. What do you want from me?” I said, pretending to be oblivious.

He groaned and buried his head in my chest, slipping his hand between my legs whilst he crossed his own legs. I smirked and pushed his hand away, pouting innocently.

“Frank. We have guests. A lot, at that.”

He whined and held me close, pointing at his crotch and putting on puppy dog eyes. I sighed and rolled my eyes, folding my arms.

“Alright. But if we get complaints, I’m blaming your horny ass.”

He giggled and kissed me, instantly laying us down. His shirt came off and so did mine, and then came my shorts. He was just undoing my bra when the doorbell rang.

“What the fuck? It’s two in the Goddamned morning!”

I sighed and pulled on my robe, before walking downstairs. As much as I’d actually wanted to take advantage of a dismally drunk Frankie, the persistent pressing of the doorbell was annoying the shit out of me.

“I’m coming, for fucks sake!”

At my yell, Cariad started to saunter down the stairs, rubbing those blue eyes and yawning as she stumbled down.

I opened the door, to see some blonde guy waiting for me. I cocked an eyebrow, and his green gaze turned from annoyed to slightly confused.

“Is Cariad Webster here?”

***
Gerard wandered in drunk as I was waking up on the couch. Those hazel eyes were rather dull as he looked at me. I felt like shit. I had the most murderous hangover ever. Bear bottles and cider cans littered the ground, and as he saw them, his expression grew more tired.

“Did a fucking bomb hit?”

I shook my head, feeling slightly scared. Everything was spinning and I swear not all of the alcohol had been pissed or thrown up out of my system. I daren’t get up in case I ruined the immaculate carpet beneath our feet.

Mikey stumbled in from the hall, groaning and holding his head. Gerard saw him and grew angry, and Mikey looked up to him, also looking angry.

“What the hell?”

His comment made me feel like shit. And considering I was already feeling considerably shitty, I was rather at rock-bottom. I couldn’t bare another fight, so I just rolled over into the couch, yelling obscenities as I drifted off.

I heard the crashes and bangs and thumps and kicks even as sleep washed back over me. But at least I couldn’t see the devastation.
***