When It All Comes Down

Hayley watched her mother has she cooked some sausages. It had been awhile since she had cooked and she realized how very different she looked. Strands of gray hair seemed to be more visible, there were dark shadows under her eyes and she seemed to have lost some weight.

That’s when Hayley realized that she wasn’t the only one who was suffering. Her parents were, too. She remembered Lacey lying on the hospital bed and how her parents hadn’t come to see her with her. She wondered what her parents were going to do, if they really were going to get a divorce. She heard them talking and arguing whenever she tried to sleep each night.

She sat at the kitchen table and opened up her textbook, beginning to work on her History homework. “So you’re finally cooking.” She said it without looking up.

Her mother looked at her. “Yeah.” She turned back to the pan, flipping over sausages and now pouring some bacon on it. “Figured that I would have to feed you one of these days. You look like you need some meat.”

You do too, mom.

“Where’s dad?”

Pause. “Went out for awhile. Don’t do your homework there, Hayley, we’re going to eat. Set the table.”

Hayley picked up her stuff and put them down in the dining room. She set three plates and three sets of forks on the table, wondering if she should’ve gotten just enough just for two. Hating the silence between them, she turned on the television and put on America’s Funniest Home Videos.

Her mother set the plate of food on the center and they both sat down. “There’s no need to get a plate for your father. He’s not going to be eating with us.” As Hayley squeezed ketchup onto her plate, her mother pushed aside the third plate. Hayley wondered if her father was ever going to come back.

They sat and watched television, her mother laughing and Hayley staying silent. She was never close to her mom, only her dad. Lacey was the one who was closer to their mom.

Without thinking about it, Hayley asked, “Are you and dad really getting a divorce?”

Her mother’s smile vanished and she turned to look at her daughter. Her face seemed older than ever, her hair tangled in a mess. Hayley knew that she had been working hard at her job.

“Oh, love, I don’t know.” She turned back to the television. This time, she wasn’t paying attention to it. “Don’t talk to me about it right now.”

The discussion disclosed. Hayley kept her mouth shut. She got up and cleaned up her plate and utensil and headed upstairs, heaving her backpack up over her shoulder.

She had gotten her laptop, cell phone and iPod back just awhile ago. She pushed her homework away and turned on the Mac, wanting to push out things from her mind.

Glancing at Lacey’s closet, she had an idea. She hadn’t been wearing some of her sister’s clothes a lot. She stood up and opened the closet, staring at the shirts and dresses hanging. Those were the things that she envied her sister for. Her sister was always so pretty, so into fashion. Her sister had her life planned out already. What college she was going to and what she wanted to do. She wanted to be part of the fashion world.

But, Hayley thought miserably, her sister wouldn’t able to accomplish any of her dreams anymore.

~+~
“I’m going to meet up with him today.”

Hayley tried to look interested as she listened to Noelle talk about some guy she met up on the internet. Particularly she didn’t really care.

“Oh? That’s cool. Where does he live?”

“Like half an hour from here. He’s so cute!” Noelle gushed. She was always trying to get into some guy’s pants every week, or weekend. “I’m such a whore,” she sighed. Alexis, Kevin, and Mac all looked at her from eating their lunch.

“What?” Noelle shrugged. “At least I admit it. Most people don’t.”

Hayley dipped a French fry in ketchup and popped it into her mouth. “What ever happened to that hot tub guy, Michael?”

“Oh, honey, that was awhile ago. I haven’t talked to him since a month or two.”

“You know Brian that I told you about?” Alexis spoke up, giddy with excitement.

“The one with the piercing on his nipple?” Noelle asked eagerly.

“Yeah,” Alexis said. “He might ask me out! Oh, God, yes. He’s so good in bed,” she added dreamily.

“Wait, I want to have sex with him too!” Noelle shot her hand up.

Hayley rolled her eyes and looked at the boys. “Are they always like this?”

“Every fucking day,” Mac grumbled. He glanced around. “Is Mrs. Moreno around? I need to finish this stupid Spanish sheet.”

“Here, I got the answers to that.” Alexis shoveled through her backpack, took out yellow sheet, and passed it to him.

“I fucking love you,” Mac said, taking it and began to copy in a frenzy. “Come here Alexis I’m going to kiss you.”

“No! She’s my wife,” Noelle said. Alexis rolled her eyes.

“I thought Hayley is your wife,” Kevin reminded her.

“She’s my first wife, you freaking piece of nature.”

Kevin looked aghast. “The fuck?”

Everyone laughed and Hayley gazed far out to the table nearby. She was glancing at Lyric, without meaning to. She didn’t want him in her life, she didn’t need anybody. She knew that and she was perfectly capable of herself. Well, she had promised herself to get better. She didn’t need anybody, and she’d constantly repeat that over and over in her head.

Lyric knew she was looking at him but he didn’t dare look back. She wanted him out of the way, so be it. It was for the best, anyway. He was going to keep trying but he didn’t want to get too attached. He knew that she was hurting herself and he really wanted to help. He never told anybody, not even Chris, about what she was going through. It was as if it was their secret.

No matter how much it hurt him, he didn’t want to fall too much in love with her.

He tuned back in to his friends’ conversation, trying to avoid the fact that Hayley was glancing at him. In fact, he could even feel her eyes on him.

“Oh, so Beastly came out today. Wanna see it?” Dean was now speaking. “I mean, Vanessa Hudgens looks pretty hot there.”

“I’d rather see something worthwhile,” Pat said.

“Sweet,” Dean grinned. He turned to Lyric. “Interested seeing a movie with us, Lyric?”

Lyric shook his head. “Nah, I have a Biology test to study for tomorrow.”

“You always study!” Pat whined, setting down his carton of milk. “You need some fun. Let’s watch some porn at my house.”

“Jesus Christ,” Chris muttered under his breath while Dean’s eyes brightened.

“Good idea!”

Lyric groaned, hiding his face in his arms while trying not to laugh. He could always count on his friends for a laugh, even if they were retarded.

Glancing at the clock, he put away all his belongings back in his backpack and threw away his trash. Just in time, the bell rang and everyone got up to leave the cafeteria.

Trudging along behind Chris and Dean, he spotted her among the crowd.

It’s amazing, he thought, how someone who looks normal can be so defeated inside.