Maternity Bedlam

Everyone was waiting in the waiting room to find out any news on Jonathan. It’s been more than 3 hours now and no news on it. I look at Tazer’s parents and younger brother as they wonder what is going on with their son. I see another set a people waiting with Bryan, Andree, and David, waiting any word of what was happening.

We just finished a game when he received a text to go to the hospital. I knew today was his wife’s baby shower but didn’t expect the baby to come out so soon. Don’t get me wrong, I like Tazer’s wife Candace. Heck, if she didn’t marry and get knocked up by Tazer, I would try to tap that ass. Now I know I have to accept losing my wingman for good once that baby is out. I heard it’s a boy and planning to name him Camden. They should’ve chosen Patrick instead. Patrick Toews. It has a nice ring to it, not Camden Toews.

Once again, I look at Candace’s family as they wait for any news on their daughter. The youngest one is cute but is jailbait. She looks to be about the same age as my youngest sister Jackie. I heard she’s a hockey player herself so I’m sure she and Jackie will get along. I turn my attention to Candace’s equally hot sister Mallory. Unlike Candace, who is short, Mallory’s tall and leggy. She looks like she can compete in some beauty pageant like Miss Universe or something. I remember Tazer told me about her and how she broke up with him before joining the Hawks. If I knew her then, I would like to get a piece of her. However, she’s a future Blues WAG as she’s engaged to TJ Oshie. Hey, what happened to “bros over hoes” when it comes to dating?

I promise myself that when the baby is born, I’m going to entertain him with this cute Big Bird costume. Even though I’m short to play Big Bird, I already have the personality to pull it off. So I went into the bathroom and changed to the costume, hoping to cheer up Tazer and Candace at the delivery room. However, when I walked in, Mrs. Toews became that girl from “The Exorcist” and starting to throw stuff at me. I know pregnant women are crabby but never to the extreme.

In defeat I walked back to the waiting room to laughs from everyone. Even David took a picture of me in my costume. No one appreciates me. It’s not fair! I walked away and decided to take a walk along the maternity ward of the hospital. I look at all the cute babies crying and cooing as I wonder will I ever find happiness for myself. It seems like everyone’s getting married or having kids and I’m still stuck in “frat boy mode”. I can’t help that I’m a kid at heart but it would be nice to come home to someone all the time. Jonathan told me to be patient but how many more hookup ups I have to go through before finding a good girl for myself.

“So who’s your baby, Big Bird?” A young woman’s voice with an accent giggled as I look over to see her. She was wearing nurse scrubs but still a total cutie. I usually go for blondes but her dark hair makes her big blue eyes pop.

“Oh I don’t have any kids. I was trying to entertain a friend.” I blushed as I realized I still have my costume on.

“Well that’s cute. Besides, I like Big Bird.” She smiled as I look at her name tag. I was thinking something along the lines of a “Missy” or a “Barbie” but Galit is really unique for an exotic woman like her.

“Oh really, Galit?” At that moment, she hid her name tag and blushed as well. “Long day at work?”

“Almost towards the end of my shift. Try pulling a 12-hour shift while dealing with newborn babies. I still have one more to deal with. Apparently it’s the captain of the Blackhawks’ baby. Last name Toes.”

“You mean Jonathan Toews?” I corrected her. By the way she pronounced it, she doesn’t watch hockey.

“Yeah. But I don’t watch hockey. I’m not from around here. We don’t have hockey teams in Israel.”

“Wow that’s a long way home.”

“I moved to the US when I was 14 so I don’t have to join the Army. I like the US.” She smiled as she started to walk away. “Need to go back. Nice meeting you, Big Bird.”

“Actually it’s Patrick. If you’re not busy, maybe we can grab some coffee or something.”

“I prefer calling you Big Bird.” Galit smiled as she walked away.

A few hours had passed and no sign of Tazer and Candace’s baby. My costume is off but all I can think about is that cute nurse from the ward. She said she’s helping the doctor to deliver the baby but I haven’t seen her leave the room yet.

“Pat, just go home.” Mallory smiled as she placed her cell phone away. “You need to wait on them to have their baby.”

“But it’s boring at my place.”

“Then find someone to go home with or something. Use your Big Bird costume or something. We’ll let you know about the baby.” Mallory’s right. It’s not like it’s my child or my sister’s kid. It’s just Tazer’s baby.

Before leaving the hospital, I went to the cafeteria to grab some coffee only to see Galit at the cashier paying for her drink. I guess that coffee date will be sooner than I thought.

“You must’ve read my mind.” I raised my eyebrow to her.

“Hi Big Bird. Where’s the costume?” She sat down by a nearby table.

“I left it with Oscar the Grouch. So we’re here, in a cafeteria with coffees in our hands. I guess it’s our lucky day.”

“I’m just very tired.” Galit placed her head on the table.

“I know what you mean. We just had a game today and I haven’t gone home to rest or shower.”

“Eww. You’re stinky.” She gestured her hand as she smelled something foul. “But you’re cute.”

“Good. So tell me why a pretty girl like you is working at a hospital? You should be modeling or something.”

“I’m a RN. Our lives consist of being night owls and extremely long shifts. Maybe I should’ve been a zombie instead.”

“Or we can make this fun and play ER.”

“It’s that a pick-up line?”

“I didn’t mean it that way. But let’s have some fun while the night is young.”

“What do you have in mind?” At that moment, I winked and thought of something fun we can do.

Within minutes, we were racing with wheelchairs in the cafeteria, stealing all the patients’ food, and playing check up in a spare room. The best thing about it: we didn’t get caught. At every activity, I get to know her a little bit more like how she picked up the English language so quickly and avoiding the Army by moving to Chicago.

I knew I had to let her go because she needs to get some sleep so we walked out of the hospital together. She was planning to take the El back but offered to pay for a cab to go back to her place. A part of me wants to ask for her number or give her a kiss but it’ll be pushing it since she’s been up all day. So I gave her a hug and watch her leave, probably never seeing her again. As I was placing my hands on my pockets, I saw a piece of paper and opened it.

I had a great time, Big Bird. I’m free tomorrow. Meet me at the entrance of the Lincoln Park Zoo at 1pm.
xoxo, Galit

The next day I walked over to the zoo, hoping this was not a set up to get mugged. I stopped by earlier to see Tazer and Candace, who gave birth to Camden overnight. He’s very cute, like a mini-Tazer who was blessed with Candace’s good looks. I made it there a couple of minutes before 1, praying that I would see the girl with the scrubs and infectious smile again. However, when I saw that very beautiful brunette in a cute strapless spring dress, I know I’m about to have a great day.