The Expectation to Never Expect
one
People always tell you the first time you fall in love will stay with you for as long as you live. That the initial moment you give your heart away you never truly get it back, you'll always be that tiny bit in love no matter what happens.
People always said this as I grew up, but once I grew up I told them the very thing nobody else could. That, the idea of love was pure, complete, incomprehensible bullshit.
James Delaney was the first boy I thought I loved. He was perfect. A Christian boy with the most breath taking smile and arms that seemed to be made just to fit me inside. James never strayed too far from my side, he stood up for me no matter what and told me he loved me at every chance he got.
We were friends for four years before he managed to have the guts to kiss me at a party. Back then I was sixteen and hadn't quite acquired the thirst for alcohol and neither had he. We were completely uncompelled by liquor, just childishly laughing in a corners where we were practically invisible. One second we were teasing a barely dressed blonde and the next his lips were warmly pressed against mine.
He was a sweetheart. The type of boy that girls in movies fall in love with. We spent Saturdays lying on top of hills looking over oceans and watching clouds roll by and Sunday mornings cuddled up in bed. We were sickly cliche teenagers in love and absolutely nothing mattered.
James appeared on my doorstep every anniversary with a bouquet of freshly cut flowers and a hand written note, despite my telling him not to bother.
It took a lot to make me mad at him, we didn't fight, we didn't argue. Our opinions were always similar, it's why we'd maintained a friendship for so long. It took one phone call on a Sunday night to destroy everything.
James Delaney's voice was heavy with tears and remorse, he'd soberly slept with Jessica Fisher and as a result ruined everything I thought we had.
Tear stained I fell asleep for the first time in twelve months as James Delaney's most recent ex-girlfriend and right before I hung up the phone he whispered that he loved me.
Love? Ha!
Love was a fucking moronic idea that people were fooled into believing in by the likes of Shakespeare and Walt Disney.
People always said this as I grew up, but once I grew up I told them the very thing nobody else could. That, the idea of love was pure, complete, incomprehensible bullshit.
James Delaney was the first boy I thought I loved. He was perfect. A Christian boy with the most breath taking smile and arms that seemed to be made just to fit me inside. James never strayed too far from my side, he stood up for me no matter what and told me he loved me at every chance he got.
We were friends for four years before he managed to have the guts to kiss me at a party. Back then I was sixteen and hadn't quite acquired the thirst for alcohol and neither had he. We were completely uncompelled by liquor, just childishly laughing in a corners where we were practically invisible. One second we were teasing a barely dressed blonde and the next his lips were warmly pressed against mine.
He was a sweetheart. The type of boy that girls in movies fall in love with. We spent Saturdays lying on top of hills looking over oceans and watching clouds roll by and Sunday mornings cuddled up in bed. We were sickly cliche teenagers in love and absolutely nothing mattered.
James appeared on my doorstep every anniversary with a bouquet of freshly cut flowers and a hand written note, despite my telling him not to bother.
It took a lot to make me mad at him, we didn't fight, we didn't argue. Our opinions were always similar, it's why we'd maintained a friendship for so long. It took one phone call on a Sunday night to destroy everything.
James Delaney's voice was heavy with tears and remorse, he'd soberly slept with Jessica Fisher and as a result ruined everything I thought we had.
Tear stained I fell asleep for the first time in twelve months as James Delaney's most recent ex-girlfriend and right before I hung up the phone he whispered that he loved me.
Love? Ha!
Love was a fucking moronic idea that people were fooled into believing in by the likes of Shakespeare and Walt Disney.
♠ ♠ ♠
The new project...This is based very strongly on the first summer I spent as a high school graduate, away from everything I knew and was familiar with.
People's names have obviously been changed and some situation exaggerated simply for the purpose of keeping it entertaining :)
That being said, feel free to tell me anything you think.
Live a.
Xx