Missing You

“Marks! You got mail!” shouts Daniel, one of the cabin mates. It was his turn this week for mail duty, handing out letters and home packages from family and friends back home to the cadets in the bunker.

Drew bolts in the sitting position “Me?” he asks shocked, he hadn’t received any mail since he arrived here.

Daniel held out an eggshell-white envelope, the address and Drew’s personal details on it. It was definitely for him.

Tyler sat up, eager to see his friend’s happiness. He kept his cool though and continued to toy with the mini-basketball in his hand, his little brother’s ball he was given before he left.

Drew jumped off his bunk and took the letter, smiling happily. Lucy must have replied, a surge of overwhelming happiness washed over him.

Drew sliced the envelope open with his finger and took it out; unfolding it carefully. Lucy’s recognizable handwriting was clear on the page.

Dear Drew,

I want to first say I’m sorry for letting my stubborn attitude for getting in the way. The truth is, I know by writing this that you truly are gone. I just haven’t accepted it yet.

As much as I want this to be a social letter alone, I have some pretty big news. But before I tell you, just know I really miss you Drew – so much, I always think of you and some nights I lie awake and just wonder what you’re doing, when I can be with you again. Sounds silly I know, but I guess that saying of you don’t know what you truly have until it’s gone is a definite.

Well enough stalling, it’s time for the truth. The past two months have been hell, not just because you’re not there but the plain thing is Drew: I’m pregnant. God, it feels odd writing that. But it’s true; I’m 8 weeks pregnant and only three days ago I got my first sonogram. So yes, I’m keeping the baby. You know how I feel about abortion and the idea of someone else raising out child isn’t thinkable… It’s our baby Drew, it was incredible. I was lying there in this cold room, and this weird gel stuff was on my stomach and then I heard this fast, tiny heartbeat. I was remembering that night at Caleb Scott’s party, when you told me you loved me. You made me the happiest girl that night, and you still do make me happy. I understand this will be difficult for you to grasp, especially as you can’t voice opinion, I hope you respect mine and you also agree that we should keep it.

I know I may seem calm, but trust me I’m not. I just…I’ve accepted it. You must be shocked, I understand. I was too. I so wish you to be here, especially for my next appointment. If only you could hear the scan. You might even cry, although you’re a big tough guy. I did, I cried lots. My Mom did too, Chris and Abby also know and Charlie keeps asking me why I’m sick every morning. I’ll start writing often now, I’ll keep you updated. I can’t wait till you come home.

Missing you,

Love Lucy xx

Drew’s shock was indescribable, as it fully sunk it. His girlfriend – his gorgeous, amazing lovely Lucy was pregnant, with his child. Drew’s world suddenly broke down.

The paper slipped from his hand, fluttering the floor. Tyler, noticing Drew’s stunned expression jumps up and stands in front of him. Tyler waves a hand in front of Drew, hoping he was okay.

“Drew? Drew!” asks Tyler. George picking up Tyler’s panicked tone, rushes over.

“Andrew?” calls George, tapping his arm but Drew stayed like stone.

Jack attempted to wake him from his trance, Alex sighed and climbed on Drew’s bunk, hovering over him and poured a glass of water over Drew.

Drew shook his wet hair out, and glared at Alex.

“Sorry man, you went weird” mutters Alex, his speech pronounced oddly, he however was smirking.

“Dude? What’s wrong?” shouts Tyler, shaking Drew by the arms.

Drew looks at Tyler.

“Lucy’s pregnant” he states and Tyler’s hands drop from Drew’s arm.

“You knocked her up?” yells Jack, causing a clip around the head from Alex.

“Shut up!” he hisses at Jack, for his uncaring behaviour.

“How old is she?” murmurs George, sitting down calmly.

“18” mumbles Drew, picking up the letter.

“That’s rough man” says Tyler finally.

Drew couldn’t find words. “She’s keeping it, she’s eight weeks pregnant” Drew tells them, searching each of their faces.

“You know what you have to do right?” says Tyler, the usual gangster swagger vanished.

Drew flickers to Tyler “What?” he asks lowly.

“Man, you have to get out of here as soon as this job is done” cries Tyler slapping Drew’s arms. George nods agreeing, he had been fortunate to have time off for both of his daughter’s births and growing up till their first years.

The final stage of shock set in, Drew collapses on Tyler’s bed with a light thud and buried his head in his hands, crinkling the letter.

“Oh Luce…” he mumbles to himself, missing Lucy more than ever.

--

It was another week before Lucy told Drew’s parents, Tom and Angie. Lucy liked Drew’s parents and Tom and Angie loved Lucy like their own daughter.

They were surprised when she told them they were going to be grandparents, Angie was the tearful one and Tom stayed silent. Joey, Drew’s older brother was there too, and gave Lucy a comforting hug. Angie smiled at Lucy, reassuring her and Tom kissed Lucy’s forehead, whispering a thank you.

Lucy was feeling better already, as the weeks slowly passed, each day Lucy thought of Drew, his green eyes he got from his Dad, his light brown hair that was usually naturally spiked up. Lucy was now reaching her 4 month mark and a cute, rounded baby bump was protruding under her clothes. Lucy was crying a lot more now, especially when her favourite jeans didn’t fit her anymore.

Lucy and Drew wrote many letters, basic love letters really…but it kept Lucy and Drew going, knowing they had someone in the world to share a life with. Lucy had her four month scan and decided to surprise Drew with something better than just a letter….

--

“Marks!” snaps Officer Johnson, he didn’t hate Drew, and in fact he had some new found respect for the young man. He heard recently about Drew’s girlfriend being pregnant, he knew it was rough for him being away.

“Sir Yes Sir!” shouts Drew, saluting as per usual. Officer Johnson stalked up to him, everyone watched intently, watching to see what their Officer’s inspection was for.

Officer Johnson produces a large brown paper package from behind his back, it made Drew wonder how he hid it so well.

“I’ve been given instructions by a certain Miss. Lucy Valance” he says calmly, everyone was surprised at his soft attitude. What the young boys didn’t know is Officer Johnson had his own loving wife at home and three teenage children. He knew what pain Drew was feeling….

“Lucy?” he asks surprised, also worried in case something had happened to her or the baby.

Officer Johnson smiles knowingly “She told me that you must read the note before opening the package…and no matter what…open the second envelope until after you opened the package” he says from memory after receiving the detailed letter addressed to him.

Drew smiles “Yes sir” he says calmly, Officer Johnson nods once, handing him the package, it had one envelope on top, and one inside.

Officer Johnson salutes, and Drew copies. The other cabin members also salute as respect for their Officer, Johnson then marches out.

Once he was clear, Drew relaxed and opened the letter eagerly, wanting to read Lucy’s words. He missed that girl so much, every little thing about her. The way she smiled, the way she was confused and she would bite her lip gently and tilt her head. It was adorable to him.

He missed just spending time with the most, yes they went on plenty of dates and outings, but the times where none of it was planned, where they might just go to the beach one afternoon and sit on their favourite spot on the sand dunes. Lucy sitting between his legs and he’d hugged her tightly from behind as they would talk about the future.

Tyler smiles and winks at Drew as he began to read….

Drew,

Not much to say really just please don’t cheat. You can open the package, set it up and listen. I’ve said too much now…

Anyway, I love you forever and always.

Missing you…a lot

Lucy xx

Drew couldn’t stop the disappointed feeling inside him, a few lines. How odd. Drew frowned slightly and put the letter on his bedside table and then handled the package, it was fairly heavy but not too much.

“Open it then!” says Jack eagerly; he was far too nosey for his own good. George rolls his eyes but his face showed curiosity also.

Drew smiles to himself, and opens the package, inside was a cardboard box. On the cardboard box was an envelope taped to the top.

The itching feeling to open the envelope first came across Drew, but he decided that Lucy would be upset if she found out not that she would, but he knew he shouldn’t. Instead, he sliced the cardboard box open with a craft knife. His friends gathered around, as Drew took out what was inside: a portable DVD player, and a disc in small plastic case. Confusion appeared on Drew’s face but stayed silent as he took the disc out its case. It read Drew in Sharpie black ink on the disc.

Drew puts it in the DVD player and lifted the screen up and pressed play – the screen was black for a few seconds while it loaded whatever Lucy had given him. Then it went fuzzy until Lucy’s figure was there…right on the screen….sitting down.

Drew stared at the screen intently, taking in her appearance. She looked healthy, slightly tanner. Her hair was in perfect, relaxed curl ringlets. And from what he could see she was wearing a plain long sleeved white t-shirt a necklace draped her neck: it was the one he had given her a few anniversaries ago.

“That your girl?” whispers Jack, who was looking over Drew’s shoulder. Drew nodded quickly, not taking his eyes off the screen. Jack whispers a word but Drew didn’t hear as Lucy was all he could see.

“Okay….I feel kind of stupid doing this. But…I’m sick of writing letters and not seeing your face. I imagined you felt the same, so decided to give you this. First off, Hi Drew” she begins in her angelic voice.

The guys were whispering about something but Drew paid no attention.

“Oh and hi to Tyler, Jack, George and Alex….Drew’s friends, I hope I got that right” she suddenly says. Tyler smiled brightly and punched Drew’s arm playfully.

“Anyway, Hi Drew, I hope you’re okay and you’re not fighting or anything because…I need you to come home safely okay? I told your parents by the way about the baby, I hope you don’t mind…your Mom cried which set me off of course. Your Dad….he thanked me Drew which was weird but really sweet and Joey well he’s already brought half the baby stuff with me” she giggles and Drew smiles widely.

“Everyone’s fine – me and the baby included, I don’t know what the sex is yet and I’m going to wait till you reply telling me if you want to know or not. I’m not sure to be honest. It’s pretty hard at the moment, I’m an emotional wreck, and I’m gaining pounds quicker than that time Joey was late for his interview in West Side.” she jokes and Drew laughed slightly, remembering the time.

“I know you’re working hard but remember I do miss you so much. And I just wanted you to see me…to show you something too. I’m going to stand up in a minute, and show you our baby. It’s pretty cool actually…it kicked the other day!” she squeals and Drew smiles, sadness dreaded in him.

George patted Drew’s shoulder in comfort as it continued.

Lucy sighs on the video, tears coming to her eyes, she wiped them away quickly.

“God-” she sniffs “I’m sorry Drew, I told myself I wouldn’t do this, but being without you is so much harder than I imagined. I know we planned this and everything but….couldn’t we just break rules for a change?” she asks him.

“Sorry, sorry…I’m fine. Anyway…My Mom is really happy lately, she can’t wait for you to come home so she can cook for you again. Chris and Abby are searching for their own place, so their old room can be the baby’s room. I need your input for stuff like this. What colour the stuff should be? Anyway….let me introduce to our baby” she says and she pushes her chair back. Gets up and moves further back from the camera. Drew now noticed she was wearing a pair of his sweatpants he left at hers.

Drew gasped lightly, as he saw Lucy’s perfect baby bump.

“This is our baby” she introduces, placing a protective hand over it.

Everyone murmurs congratulations to Drew, but he didn’t respond.

“Baby meet your Daddy….he’s not here at the moment which is why we’re talking to a camera. But he’ll be home soon. Then you can meet him and he’s going to love you more than anything” she says and then looks surprised.

“The baby likes you Drew, the baby kicked like three times just then. So I think you’re safe….” she jokes and Drew laughs quietly.

Drew hears background noise and suddenly her bedroom door flies open, and in walks Lucy’s nephew Charlie.

“Charlie! Did you climb the stairs?” asks Lucy, picking her nephew up easily.
Charlie giggles and waves at the camera “Dee” he says, what he always called Drew. Lucy smiles softly, kissing his head.

“Yeah, we’re saying hello to Uncle Drew” she says cheerfully. Charlie shrieks with laughter. Lucy smiles at him lovingly.

“In five months, we’re having one of these” she tells Drew, into the camera.

“Can you believe it?” she whispers, looking down at her stomach. Drew was lost for words.
Lucy balanced Charlie expertly on her hip.

“LUCY! CHARLIE! WE’VE GOT TO GO!” shouts Anna’s recognizable voice from downstairs.

Lucy smiles at the camera again “I’ve got another appointment today, I’m a bit scared though…your brother is coming with us by the way, hope that’s not weird for you. He just really wants to see his future nephew or niece. Chris and him are even taking bets” she laughs.

Drew shakes his head thinking of Joey. “And also…apparently according to Joey the nurse is really hot and he says he’s going for her, bear in mind she’s like married” she adds and Drew laughs, so do his friends.

“Well I’m going now; you may now open the extra gift I added. It’s not much, but it’s something right? I love you Drew at an impossibly rate. Missing you the same amount and….bye, if you can, call me because I just want to hear your voice. Love you!” she calls.

Charlie waves again and Lucy blows a kiss before picking up the remote and turning the device off. Drew couldn’t help it as one tear fell from his eyes. He wiped it away furiously, not wanting his friends to see.

“Aw Dude, it’s okay….that was pretty awesome of her” encourages Tyler, sitting beside him and hugging him brotherly. Drew gladly returns it.

Drew nods sadly and puts the DVD player to the side; he then picks up the cardboard box again, taking the envelope off.

“I wonder what it is” voices Alex, the guys smirk at him except Drew, who handled it carefully, then tore it open. Two things dropped out, a photograph on his lap and a letter in his hand.

Drew picked up the letter first…

Dear Drew,

I hope you liked the video, this is for you. To show you how much we love you (baby and me). Also, I wanted you to see how cool it was.

Love you always,
Missing you…

Lucy xx

Drew picked up the photograph and turned it over, and he stared at it in awe, it was black and white sonogram. He glanced at the date; it was a little over a week ago. So it was the four month sonogram. Drew handled the picture with care, stroking his thumb over the clear baby shape. A head was clear and some legs too.

“Drew….that’s pretty cool” says Jack finally, breaking the silence.

Tyler stared at it too “Man, that’s your baby” he tells him and Drew nods happily. He turned it open and Lucy’s handwriting had written BABY on the back. Drew smiles half-heartily. His girlfriend was pretty amazing.

Drew stuck the picture up above his bed, showing it in pride and tucked the DVD player away, going to watch it again later privately. The last thought for Drew that night was for Lucy and his baby.

“I love you” he thinks, wishing she could be here to actually hear him say it.