Living a Dream

"The fuck he meant by that?!" I asked Jade, fuming.
Before she can ever give me some kind of an answer I cut her off. "I dunno. I guess I wanted to do it fo' a long time." I mock him.
"Asshole."

Jade just chuckles, presumably at the childish pout I was sporting on my face.
"Why do you let him get to you like that?" She shakes her head in disapproval.
"So he didn't say anything more?" She asks for the tenth time.

I sigh in annoyance and answer her once more. "No. Like I said ten times already, he just left, leaving me dumbstruck."

"Okay, and what did you do?"
"I let my frustration out by writing, as always." I answer absent mindedly.
"So you have some new lyrics?"
I nod. "I actually have a good idea." I look back at her with a smile and she eyes me curiously.

She monitions me to continue.
"The tour is over in less then a month." She nods. "And trough it we wrote some really great songs and we've grown closer, us three." She smiles and nods again."
"And I think we really have a chance as a band. So I thought we should go up a step with this and once we get back start making a demo and send it out to several recording studios."

Her eyes glaze over as if she was thinking about it, or daydreaming even.
"I think we should." She says with a grin on her face and gets around the table and hugs me. I hug her back, squeezing tightly.

"Thank you." I say quietly.
"For what?" She pulls back and looks at me confused.
"For caring, listening, tolerating me, for helping me pursue my dreams and not going crazy being this far away from home and everyone I left there. Thank you for being my friend, no one has ever really been one." My glossy eyes matched hers. She quickly pulls me back into another tight hug.

"No, thank you." I smile, ignoring the bitter sweet tears.

When we regain ourselves a couple minutes later and wipe our tear stained cheeks.
"Tell me something, though." She says. "Why does Oli get to you so much? I mean, I know you don't feel something really strong for him, you do like him, but still."

I sigh. I hoped she wouldn't ask this but I knew I can tell her. "I just never really liked anyone." I exhale deeply. "It's hard to explain. I had minor crushes, but that was all nothing. Those guys didn't even like girls like me, and I liked them for their looks, personality wise it was like different worlds. So, I guess that's why."

She nods understandingly.

"Hey guys. Sorry I'm late, I, um, stayed to watched the guys' sound check." Alexa stutters.
Jade and I look at her, eyebrows raised but she just ignores us. We just drop it, knowing she would say what's on her mind if she wanted to.

"Anything new?"
"Actually, Ange and I talked about something, I believe you would like ti." Jade retells her everything I told her and when she's done, Alexa has a big grin on her pale face.
"That's amazing!" She exclaims. "Do you want to send the demo to your uncle Tom?"

I shake my head. "No. He would do anything for me without me even asking, this wouldn't be an exception. And I want us to make it by ourselves, not looking back years from now and knowing that we got somewhere because of family ties."

They both agree.
"Shit!" Jade yells. "BVB is almost on! Fuck, I'll be late!"
"Wait, Bring Me has a set starting fifteen minutes after BVB." I stand up abruptly and gather my stuff from the table.
"I'll go with you then, I don't want to stay here alone." Alexa says while getting up.



I watch the guys as they finish their set. As Lee and Jona play guitar, Matt the drums, other Matt bass and as Oli screams. As they do what they love and I realize now more then I have before - this is what I want to do.