Adolescent

“Jimmy,”I struggled to blow the smoke from my lungs for a moment.

“I’m at the boardwalk. Where are you?”He seemed antsy, but I wasn’t going to push anything.

“On the pier.”I looked over at my parents, who smiled approvingly at me.

I had to explain that they had to meet him, just in case. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings, but we all had to be safe in this.

“Towards the ferris wheel. And Jimmy, my parents want to meet you.”I cringed at telling him, but it had to be done, right?

“Sure, no problem. I’ll meet you over there, alright?”He didn’t seem bothered by the fact that they would be with us, at least for a little while.

“Alright, see you in a couple of minutes.”I went to hang up, but realized one thing; what did he even look like?”Wait!”

I felt relieved when his voice came back over the phone.

“What do you look like?”I stepped out my cigarette.

He laughed quietly on the other end, so I took it as a “not what you’re expecting” kind of thing.

“Like a guy who doesn’t belong on a beach.”I laughed quietly at him.

There were a lot of people who didn’t belong on the beach, but I wouldn’t say anything. As we said our goodbyes, I hung up the phone. Instantly, butterflies took over my stomach. I felt like I was going to puke.

“Where is he?”My dad stepped forward, stomping out a cigarette aswell.

“He’s coming. Should be here soon.”I clutched my stomach, groaning quietly.

“You alright, Hillari?”My mom looked over at me curiosly.

“Oh yeah.”I sighed.”I just feel dandy.”

“You don’t have to go through with this, you know. You can always wait.”I looked up at my parents and shook my head.

“No, I,”I froze, but continued only quietly.”I want to see him.”

Did I really? Was I just pushing the invite to make him happy? I brushed my hair back and sighed softly. In all honesty I was ecstatic to see Jimmy. I just couldn’t tell you if it was good timing or not. I looked along the beach, waiting to see someone who didn’t look like they blended in well.

A few minutes passed by and my parents were ready to give it up. I stopped though, when I spotted a man in the sand, clutching a large baby blue dog. I chuckled quietly and looked up at my parents. I pointed over, saying, “Does he look like he belongs here?”

“He looks lost.”My mom chuckled.

“Think it’s him?”I asked.

“Just ask. Say, excuse-”I cut him off by waving my hand.

“I know, I know.”I walked away, peeking over my shoulder every so often to make sure they kept their eyes on me.

I could feel the bial rise up my throat, but I stubbornly pushed it back down. My legs felt like rubber by the time I was within arms length behind the man. He was very tall and thin, but still had a muscular build to him. Tattoo’s covered his body and I froze for a moment.

He was a little intimidating, but I had to build up my courage. I didn’t want him turning around and finding me there, staring at him like a moron. With a deep breath, I said, “Excuse me?”

He turned and his eyes instantly lit up. Maybe this was Jimmy, but I couldn’t be sure. I looked up into his eyes, finding them to be very, oceanic blue, just like mine. He had a labret piercing and thin lips. I swallowed hard, taking in all his features as quickly as possible. He had at least a foot on me, but it wasn’t a problem.

“Hillari?”He whispered.

He looked a lot like me, actually, from what I could tell. I wanted to walk away, but I also wanted to latch onto him and hug him like I never hugged before. I reached out slowly, but pulled back out of, I guess, fear.

“Jimmy?”I whimpered.

I looked down at the obnoxiously large stuffed animal in his hands and smiled to myself. There would only be one reason why a grown man would be carrying around a baby blue stuffed dog on the beach. He chuckled before pushing it toward me.

“I got this for you.”I gently took it from his hands, but before I could thank him, he started speaking again.”You’re beautiful.”

I put my head down, blushing in the process. I wasn’t expecting that to come out of his mouth this soon. He didn’t have to compliment me first off the bat. The sand matted behind me and I turned, finding my parents coming up. I looked back at Jimmy, expecting a hurt look. He only held a smile.

“You must be the ‘rents.”He stuck out his hand.”I’m Jimmy.”

“Heard about you, Jimmy.”My dad shook his hand.”Names Kenny.”

“Michelle.”He shook her hand aswell.

“Nice to meet you guys.”It was quiet for a few seconds.

I waited for hurtful comments to fly, or something big to happen, but within the next thirty minutes we had grabbed a bite to eat at a resturant on the boardwalk. I had to admit, Jimmy was rather funny and entertaining. He really was a guy you couldn’t hate at all.

I found myself laughing and joking around, but more importantly, wondering. Wondering why I was sitting in front of my biological father and questioning a lot of different things. I wanted to know where he came from, how long he’s known about me and what he wanted with me.

Did he want a relationship or something out of my life? No offense to him, but he looked like a washed up rock star in need of some love and care. I didn’t mind the look, but it only made me curious. It seemed like minutes by the time four o’ clock came around.

My parents and I made a deal that if by four o’ clock they had a bad feeling or I wanted them to stay, they would. But at this point, I trusted Jimmy enough to spend another hour or two with him. Hell, maybe even longer, depending on how everything went today.

My parents stood up, taking us by surprise. My dad cleared his throat before saying, “It was nice meeting you Jimmy. I hope to see you again soon. I’ve come to realize you’re a lot like us.”

Yes, they all had tattoo’s, unlike me, and enjoyed a lot of the same things, but they were different all the same. They didn’t clash like I thought they might, which I was really appreciative for.

“I will let Hillari stay for another hour or so without us, but only if she wants to.”Out of the corner of my eye, I could feel Jimmy looking over at me.

Was he hoping for a yes, or a no? I’d find out within the next couple of seconds. With a smile, I said, “I’d like to hang out a little longer.”

He seemed to tense up for a second and I froze up. A large smile suddenly appeared on his lips and I knew that I had made a good decision. With a smile, I stood from my seat and said goodbye to my parents. I waved them off and sat back, looking over at Jimmy. I opened up my bag and dug around, freezing slightly when I hit my cigarettes.

I wanted to just take one out and light up, but what would Jimmy think? Did he smoke himself, or would he freak if I started smoking right in front of him? I looked up at Jimmy and I could almost tell that he knew I had something to say. The thing is, would it be good or bad?

“You alright, Hillari?”He leaned forward in his seat, looking over at me.

“Well, you see,”How do I go about with this?

“I have to admit, you’re making me nervous.”I chuckled quietly at him.

“Gotta be honest.”I pulled out my cigarettes, gaining Jimmy’s attention quickly.”Can I light up?”

I watched as he faught with the fabric on his jeans before pulling out a mangled pack of Marlboro Reds. I tossed my lighter over when I was finished and laughed as he struggled to light his crooked cigarette. He inhaled deeply and smiled.

“Thank god.”The smoke crawled through his lips.”I was going to die.”

With a small nod, I grew confused when he looked over at me. He arched his eyebrows and asked, “How old are you, little gal?’

“Old enough.”It was the best I could come up with.

“Works for me.”He shrugged his shoulders before leaning forward in his seat.”Do they know you smoke?”

“Yeah, they do. Didn’t like it, but they smoke too.”I shrugged.

“I realized. Didn’t want to light up in front of the ‘rents, ya know?”He smiled.

“Then you don’t know them.”I laughed.

“Not really. Only met’m today.”His smile was contagious.

“True that, h-”I stopped myself, before saying it normally.”That’s true.”

I didn’t want to scare him away with my crazy personality. I was different than a lot of people, but I never cared big for first impressions. Except with him. I didn’t want Jimmy to think of me as some crazy girl.

“What were you going to say?”He chuckled.

“That’s true.”I fidgeted a little bit.

“No really, you don’t have to hide it.”He smirked.”Seriously, you can act however you want. I have some crazy ass friends.”

It was nice to know he would accept it, but I didn’t want to push much on him. I only met him today. That was another thing, how would his friends feel about me? Would they think I’m trying to get in the way of Jimmy and their relationship? What about Matt? Would I creep him out too?

“When you finally get me,”I began.”you will be completely surprised. I’m not like a lot of other people.”

“Well, that’s a good thing.”Jimmy smiled warmly.”What do you mean, when I get you?”

“I guess,”I stopped for a moment, stealing a drag from my cigarette.

I had some explaining to do, but so did Jimmy. I could only place it the best way I could.

“I guess,”I sighed softly and brought my knees to my chest.”I guess I’m just different than a lot of people. Most people like to be crazy and obnoxious, I just bring life into everything. I guess you can call me the,”

“Party animal?”I laughed at his accusation; he had absolutely no idea.

“Not even that. I like to take things as they are. I look at it through reality’s eyes, not through my imagination. I do occasionally, but I like to keep things real, you know?”I felt weird telling him this, but why stop now?

If it made any sense to him, I would only want him to think about it. I had all the time in the world to tell him what I was like and he had it aswell to figure it out. He would probably find things out about me that even I didn’t know about. I was that kind of person. Spunky, but real.

“I do the same thing.”Jimmy stomped out his cigarette and smiled warmly.”I’m the guy that likes metal over country. I like winter over summer. Chocolate over,”

“If you say vanilla,”I warned.

“Vanilla.”He smirked.

“Oh, wow.”I lazily let my legs drop and sighed.”We are definatley not on the same wavelength.”

Jimmy and I fell into a fit of laughter after a few quiet seconds. He clutched his stomach, leaning over on the side of the chair. I dropped my cigarette to the side and watched as he wiped his eyes of tears. I took the moment to fully get a look at him and could only smile.

Who would have expected such a simple reunion after seventeen years? We were both so relaxed about the whole ordeal. No harsh words were exchanged between him and my parents and no one got hurt within the first thirty seconds. He seemed to be a genuinely sweet guy, so far.

His hair fell into his eyes as he readjusted himself on his seat. I could see our relation very well, but I didn’t have his look completely. I could only think that my mother had given me the looks, him my personality. I stopped my thoughts and stood from my seat, catching Jimmy’s attention.

“Wanna hit the beach?”His gaze went from the sand and back to me.

“Sounds like a grand plan!”He stood aswell, holding out his arm for me.

With a quiet chuckle, I linked arms and walked down the boardwalk to the hot sand. In my other hand, the large stuffed animal was resting between my hip and arm. It was nearing six o’ clock and my parents would be here soon to pick me up. If I had known Jimmy better, I would have asked him for the ride.

“How long have you known about me?”I looked up at Jimmy, finding a small smile work it’s way across his lips.

“Long enough, right?”He chuckled.”For a couple of weeks, actually.”

“Were you afraid to call me?”I winced at every question, afraid I would hit a bad spot on Jimmy.

He took every question with pride, however, because the smile never left his lips. He looked down at me and his smile grew even wider. He seemed to have the attitude of a teenager, but not in a bad way. He just seemed like a fun, caring guy in general.

“Took me a couple of tries.”He began to laugh at himself.”It was like calling the girl from high school for a first date.”

“Thanks.”I playfully rolled my eyes.

“No, I was nervous. Really nervous, actually.”He grinned.”Matt got me to call you. He’s my back bone type of friend.”

“I know how that is.”I smiled.”Devin is kind of my back bone keep me safe kind of guy.”

“Who’s Devin?”We slowly came to a stop, right at the edge of the water.

The beach was basically empty by the time we finished walking, so we sat in the sand. The water came up to my feet as we continued to talk. It was relaxing and it kept my nerves in tact.

“He’s my best friend. I’ve known him for,”I let out a pshh before continuing.”eight years now?”

“Oh, wow.”He chuckled.”You have a boyfriend?”

“Well,”I blushed softly.”he, kind of, is my, boyfriend.”

Jimmy began laughing as I covered my face in my plush dog. I quietly giggled to myself as he leaned back on his hands.

“You blush so easily.”He smiled.

“I know.”I said.”Shutup.”

When I finally looked up from the soft fur of the dog, I looked out into the ocean. The sun still beamed high and it was hot, but it was comfortable with the ocean breeze. A smile came to my lips as I thought about my day so far. It had gone so well that there was absolutely nothing to complain about.

“What are your friends like, Jimmy?”I looked over, finding him staring out into the ocean also.

He turned, smiling warmly. He leaned forward, clutching his hands together in his lap. He began with, “Well, there’s Matt, my best friend. You’ll probably like him. He thinks he’s tough, but he’s a marshmallow. Then there’s Brian, but he’s kind of an asshole. Funny, but a dick.

“Then you have Zacky, who is so laid back you kind of forget about him. I do that a lot. And finally there’s short shit, or Johnny. I preferably like short shit since he’s about five foot five. I pick on him the most because I can get away with it.”I continued laughing at his descriptions, forcing a chuckle from his lips.

My pocket suddenly began going off, forcing me to jump from it. Jimmy’s face turned, making me force back a chuckle when I answered the phone. I was quite upset when I found out it was my parents.

“We’re where we were when we got here.”My dad said.”See you in a minute?”

“Alright.”I hung up, but forced a hurt smile in Jimmy’s direction.

“Go time?”He only half smiled.

He was just as upset as I was about going home. I had figured we had made a good connection; we were having fun. He slowly got to his feet and stuck out his hands for me. My frown grew at the sight and he sighed softly. I took his hands and he gently pulled me to my feet.

I grabbed the dog and hugged it tightly to my chest. In all honesty, I thought we were getting somewhere. I regretted not getting to meet Jimmy any sooner; I wanted to rewind and continue from twelve on. As we neared the parking lot I looked up at Jimmy, a sad smile pressed tight against my lips.

He smiled warmly and grasped my hand gently. His eyes watered up and I quickly held back a quiet sob. He was going to make me get upset and that’s all we needed. I knew I would see him again, but it was hard saying goodbye when you first meet.

“I am so happy I finally got to meet you, Hillari.”He whispered.”You’re a beautiful young girl and you are definatley your mother.”

I chuckled softly, sniffling back my tears. I tried to clear my throat aswell, but it was getting me nowhere.

“I’ll call you tomorrow, alright?”He asked.

I could only nod my head in agreement. Any words that would come out of my mouth would be muffled by my tears. I didn’t want to cry. Especially after knowing Jimmy for only one day. Would that seem silly to everyone? Crying because I’m leaving for the day? Or is it because we finally met?

I waved him off and started my walk to the car. My parents smiled warmly at me, knowing that I did have a good time, despite the water in my eyes. I opened the back door and put the plush inside, but stopped. I wiped my eyes free of tears and looked back.

Jimmy was walking away, head slumped over like he had done something bad. I turned to my parents, asking if they could just hold on for one moment. It was now or never, and never was coming rather quickly. I sprinted from the car, my flip flops tapping wildly against the concrete.

As Jimmy was turning around, I wrapped my arms around his waist, digging my face into his chest. He stumbled back slight at the force. He must have been surprised, because he didn’t hug me back for a couple of seconds. I held back my tears and only smiled. He tightened his grasp around me and sighed.

“Bye, Jimmy.”I pulled away, wiping my tired eyes free of tears.

“I’ll see you soon, Hillari.”I made my way back to the car, shutting it tightly behind me.

My parents stayed silent, not commenting on the event that just occurred. They were fantastic at knowing when I didn’t want to talk. They knew when silence was golden and I appreciated every moment of it. I held the stuffed animal in my lap, hugging it tightly to my chest.

After speaking with Jimmy for the last couple of weeks, I finally built up the courage to meet with him. Did I regret it? Absolutely not. Life is about taking chances and if this was my chance at something remarkable, I took it. If it was my chance at making a mistake, then so be it. I was just excited that he was back in my life, believe it or not.