Bently McQuinn Saves Literature

Rosalie had been defeated. Fang was awake again, and everyone was shaking hands. The flock had indeed taken care of Rosalie, and she was now a pile of golden dust.

“Thank you, Bently McQuinn,” said Max, hanging the Horcrux-Seeking Medallion back around Bently’s neck. “We owe you.”

“No, I think we’re about even,” he reasoned with a smile. “I broke you out and broke her hold, and you guys took care of the rest.”

“Can we get our weapons back?” Lucy asked.

“Of course.”

They went back to the lab and got Jeb out, who had been left in the crate. Then they all marched right out of the School and back to the dead wolf people. Their weapons were still there, untouched.

“Ugh, stupid Erasers smell worse when they’re dead,” said the youngest boy, pulling his shirt over his nose. Everyone else followed suit as Bently and the others picked up their weapons.

Meggie went to hand Bently back his knife, but he shook his head. “Why don’t you just keep it, you must be sick of not having a weapon.”

“But I don’t want one, I hate hurting people.”

“So do I, but they’re handy,” said Lucy. Bently took off the belt which had the knife’s sheath and gave it to Meggie.

“You never know when you’ll need it.”

“But what about you?”

“I’ve got Gryffindor’s freaking Sword. I think I can make due with just that,” Bently replied, chuckling. Then he walked over to King, showing him his back. There was no trace that Bently had ever sprouted wings.

“See? All fine.”

“It was still very dangerous,” King warned. “Next time, you might not be so lucky.”

“Yeah, yeah. Meggie, what’s next?”

“A Series of Unfortunate Events,” she replied, pulling the book out.

“Excellent, let’s get to it. You lot might want to get away, unless you want to come with us.”

“No thanks, we’ve got our own problems to sort out,” said Max, and she lead the flock and Jeb away from them. “Thanks again.”

“No problem!” Bently shouted back, and Meggie started to read.

“Like a dead poet, this book can be said to be on the road less traveled, because it begins with the three Baudelaire children on a path leading through the Mortmain Mountains, which is not a popular destination for travelers, and it ends in the churning waters of the Stricken Streams, which few travelers even go near.”

Once again, the desert was fading, and they were moving through blackness. When the world came back to being, they found themselves at the base of a very tall, very intimidating icy mountain. And it was snowing.

“Of all the terrible luck, we just have to go into another book where it snows!” Bently growled.

“It’s not my fault, I don’t get to choose which books we go into!” Meggie snapped back.

“Stop it, both of you,” Lucy said, her voice stressed. “We can’t afford to be fighting. Let’s just find whoever’s in here and get this over with.”

Lucy was right of course, and they set off. The only way they could go was up the mountain, because all around them was white.

“That’s not a snowstorm,” King explained as he rushed them up the mountain’s winding gravel path. “It’s part of the Blank World. This book has been destroyed so much that the Blank World is eating it. It’s like my story The Landgalleres.”

“What happens in that?” everyone else asked.

“These crazy rock things with teeth eat up time,” King said bluntly. “And that’s what’s going to happen to us if we don’t kick out the vampire.”

They walked and walked in the snow, which steadily got worse.

“What’s that noise?” Lucy asked, stopping suddenly.

“I don’t—”

“Hello?” the wind seemed to whisper. And out of the storm ahead of them came three people who all looked very, very much alike.

“Are you the heroes?” the girl asked as they came closer to the group.

“Yes,” Bently shouted over the wind.

“Good, let’s get up to the cave where we can talk,” said one of the boys, and the three began leading the heroes up the slope.

They eventually reached a small cave in the mountainside and they slipped in.

“We’re the Quagmire Triplets; Duncan, Isadora, and Quigley,” said Isadora, the girl, and pointed to her brothers in turn. Bently didn’t know how in the world he was going to tell Duncan and Quigley apart.

“Nice to meet you. This is Meggie, Lucy, Stephen King, and I’m Bently McQuinn.”

“We didn’t think you were coming,” said Duncan a bit despairingly. “Jasper has almost destroyed everything.”

“He’s holding Violet, Klaus, and Sunny in the crater where the V.F.D. was,” said Quigley. “If we want to fix everything, we’re going to have to defeat him before he gets rid of them and us. We’re the only reason the world is still here.”

“And the Blank World eats up a little more every day,” added Isadora. “And lately, it’s been eating faster.”

“So then let’s get going,” said Bently. It was snowing a bit fiercer outside. “We need to start now before it really starts blizzarding.”

“It’s always snowing, and blizzarding,” said Isadora. “But yes, let’s get going.”

Bently knew there was, unfortunately, no magic here, so all he could do was tighten his cloths around him, make sure his cloak was secure, and he and Isadora lead the group out into the blizzard and up the mountain.