I Still Remember

It was Thrusday afternoon and the rehersal dinner was around the corner for the day. I stayed in bed all day, I refused to even leave my bed. I mean, Marc and I had sex, we shared the most intimate thing with eachother again, but he chose her. Now I had to decide if I were going to let him get married or if I were going to object at his wedding.

I got absolute no sleep last night. The argument between Marc and I kept replaying through my head. The things I said to him I didn’t even mean and I’m sure as hell he didn’t mean half the shit he said to me. We both said shit we didn’t mean, typical human beings we are. I sighed as I head a knock from my door. “GO AWAY!” I shout.

The door swung open and in came Jared and Sydney. I watch Sydney shut the door as Jared sat on the bed next to me and Sydney sat on the edge. I didn’t feel like explaining what the fuck happened last night to them, but I figured they probably knew since I wasn’t answering my damn phone last night. It’s silent, no one talks and we all are just kind of sitting there. Sydney clears her throat. “Okay, what the hell happened last night?”

“What are you talking about?”
“We know you were with Marc last night.”
“Oh…”
“Gina, what happened?” Jared asks me.
“We had sex.”
“AGAIN!?” Jared and Sydney yelled.
“We fell asleep after, then we got into a big fight and I tried to stop him from getting married but that didn’t’ work.”
“Did he say why?” Jared asks.
“He’s afraid of what happened last time, which I don’t blame him.”
“Gina…” Sydney begins.
“God this sucks!”

I throw the pillow at my wall and there goes down a picture. Sydney walks over to it and picks it up, noticing there’s a tiny crack in the frame. She’s holding the picture now and then looks at me. “So now what?” Sydney asks.

“I have two options; object at the wedding or let him get married,” I tell them.
“I think you should object,” Jared tells me.
“Maybe he and I aren’t meant to be together.”
“That is where you are wrong,” Sydney begins. “Picture Francesca and Marc in your mind together.”
“Okay…”
“Now what do you see.”
“A bitch and prince charming. They look awkward, Francesca looks happy while Marc is putting on a smile for everyone.”
“Okay, now look at this picture and tell me what you see.”

She hands me the picture frame and I see lying behind the cracked glass a picture of Marc and I t my high school graduation. My hair was a crazy mess from the stupid hat we had to wear. Marc was hugging me and my head was on his chest in the picture. “I see two people,” I begin as Jared cuts me off.

“Good job,” he says sarcastically.
“A boy and a girl. They….”
“How do they look?” Sydney asks me.
“They…they look happy, they look like their in love. They’re not putting fake smiles for everyone on their faces, they’re genuinely happy. They look like they’re happy to be in the picture.”

I begin to cry after looking at the picture and notice Marc’s chin was on top of my forehead in the picture. I’m crying in Jared’s shoulder now as Sydney is sitting on the other side of me. She’s rubbing my shoulder as I say through sobs, “How was I such a dumbass!?”

“Well, you were young, keep that in mjnd, you did grow up quite a bit.”
“How so?”
“For one, your more mature than Marc, which we thought would be impossible.”
“I don’t know what to do?”
“I think you need to object at the wedding tomorrow,” Jared tells me.
“Why?”
“For one, I know my brother loves you. Two, I would much rather see you raising kids with Marc than that idiot, and three, you and my brother were made for each other. If you object tomorrow, it may click with him what’s infront of him.”

I thought about what Jared had to say that night as I was in bed trying to sleep. If I didn’t object, I was gonna watch Marc say I do to Francesca and regret it for the rest of my life. However, if I did object, I could possibly change Marc’s mind right then and there. Why did this decision have to be so hard?

I woke up the next morning bright and early. I showered, did my hair in a teaze with a thick black headband and a little black dress. I looked like I was going to a funeral. In a way, I kind of was because I was dying inside, so therefore, I looked like I was going to my own funeral. There was a knock on my door and the door swung open. I saw Lindsy stand there as I was looking for my heels. “You look so morbid,” she tells me.

“Gee, I don’t know, if the guy you’ve been inlove with since you were three was getting married, you’d be dressed the same.”
“Can we talk before we head out for this stupid wedding I don’t even want to go too?”
“Whats up?”
“I know you had sex with Marc the other night.”
“Jared?”
“Yeah. Look, that was wrong, but I don’t blame you for doing it. I know you love Marc and I know you have two options for this wedding.”

Lindsy knew me too well. For someone who had many issues in her life, she always gave the best advice for situations like this. I open my mouth but she holds her hand up to shut me up. She then points at the bed and pulls the chair from the desk and sits on it. I sit on the bed. “Look, I’m sorry I wasn’t the best sister. If I weren’t such an alcoholic, I would’ve fixed yours and Marcs issues four years ago.”

“Don’t apologize Lindsy, really.”
“But listen to me, you only have one chance to say how you feel at a wedding when the priest tells you too. I know you have the balls to object but you’re scard Marc is going to reject you. Listen to me as I say this, say you’re peace, it will be worth it.”
“And you know this?”
“Trust me Gina, I know. I met Frannie last night, she needs to go.”
“You’re telling me.”
“For you, Marc, and everyone else, stop that damn wedding, okay?”
“I’ll think about it.”
“GIRLS! LETS GO!” My mom yells.

We get up, hug eachother and walk down the stairs together. My mom and Rick look at me and shake their heads. “Gina, we’re going to a wedding,” My mom says but I don’t say anything. I stare out the window, thinking of what Lindsy has to say. I only get one chance to talk at a wedding when I’m told too. We pull up to Saint Michaels and Rick drops us off before parking. I stand there, looking at the church. “Earth to Gina!” Lindsy is yelling at me as I snap back to reality. She knew what I was thinking about. “Have you made a decision?” She asks as my facial expression changes.

“Lindsy, I think I know what I have to do.”