Lolita Love Story

"It seems you're home late."

Saikai jumped at the sudden voice behind her. She turned quickly, cheeks flushing automatically. It was nearly evening- the sun had already begun to disappear, pulling the blue daytime sky with it. The streets were just beginning to get dark now, and streetlights speckled the city like stars.

Caym was wry-looking as usual. His lip ring glinted in the street light, a sharp contrast to his dress clothes- a dark gray suit and black shoes. It was strange to see him like that.

"What are you doing here, Caym?" she asked, standing in front of the small black gate to her steps. The lights were on inside the house. Her grandmother was probably already concerned. If she saw Saikai talking to a boy like Caym, she would probably come to some uncomfortable conclusions about her granddaughter.

"I was waiting for you earlier today when I heard about your classmates. I was going to spend the day with you to help you take your mind off of it." He moved closer, his eyes unreadable. "But I couldn't find you. You weren't home and you weren't at school. I've been waiting here since this afternoon."

"That's very kind of you, Caym. I didn't know you planned to do that for me."

He smiled absently. "Are you well, Saikai? You seem to be such a delicate woman... I was afraid that perhaps such traumatic events would harm you."

The blood and bodies of her classmates remained fresh in her mind. The images were etched into her mind. It still made her feel sick, but it wasn't like before. "It still scares me... but I think I'll be okay."

"If you don't mind, may I stay here with you for a while?" he asked, bowing a little. "I want to talk to you about something else anyway."

"Sure. But let me speak to my grandmother first. She must be worried by now."

Caym nodded, waiting lazily on her steps as she hurried inside.

"Obaasan, tadaima!" she called, setting her briefcase near the futon. "I'm sorry that I'm late today."

Her grandmother shuffled out of the kitchen, where her grandfather was eating dinner at the table. "Sai-chan! What have you been out doing all this time? Rie-chan came by a few hours ago asking for you and told us about what happened this morning. And a boy... what was his name? Was it Kame?"

Caym... Saikai thought, biting her lip. So not only had he come over earlier, as he told her, but he'd introduced himself. So her grandmother had already met the wild-haired delinquent boy.

"I spent the afternoon with some of my friends. I was so upset by what happened and my friend wanted to help me feel better."

"Next time, please tell me about your plans, dear." Saikai's grandmother returned to the dinner table. "Dinner is ready if you haven't already eaten."

"It's okay, obaasan. Caym wants to talk to me outside. We're going to stay on the stairs, though. It won't take long."

"Alright, Sai-chan. Is that the boy who called for you earlier? He's so thin! Do you want to take some food to him?"

"No, no. It's okay," she insisted, returning outside with a jacket. She slipped it on, sitting next to him on the stairs. "I'm sorry, Caym. What was it you wanted to talk about?"

He stared quietly at his hands. The tattoos seemed to crawl across his hands from beneath his sleeves. "I've heard that there is a classmate... a boy... that you spend a lot of time with."

"Do you mean Kougou?"

"He has green streaks in his hair, and he's on the soccer team... is that Kougou? Kougou Nagasawa?" She nodded. "Is he your friend?"

"Yes... why?"

"You were with him today, weren't you?" Caym asked, still avoiding her eyes.

"Yes. What's wrong?"

"We were friends... a long time ago, as children." He smiled suddenly, nostalgic. "I was a mischievous kid back then. It's not too hard to believe, right? Well, Kou-kun was always a quiet kid. He never helped me with my mischief, but he didn't tell on me either. I used to beat up bullies at all of the other schools around here and steal their stuff. I guess I felt like they deserved it, so I never felt too guilty about what I did. Besides, I didn't do too much damage. I always spent money I got from them on arcade games with Kou-kun.

"But in middle school, Kougou decided maybe it was okay to do what I did. I would beat up the bullies and he would help me. After a while, I found out that he was stealing from innocent people, too. It was wrong of me to steal from anyone, even bullies, but I felt guiltless since they always hurt other people too. What Kougou did was different... I ignored it at first and hoped that it would go away, but it didn't. It got worse. He stole from me too. He stole my parents' wedding rings the night after my 13th birthday. That's why we aren't friends anymore."

Caym turned to Saikai, his eyes serious. "You can't be his friend, Saikai. He'll steal from you and break your heart just like he did to me." Caym suddenly took her hands, and her face grew hot. "Please, promise me that you won't be his friend."

Saikai thought of the kindhearted boy who made her feel beautiful and happy. Kougou was a quiet, shy boy and sometimes he didn't respond very smoothly to her feelings, but he was gentle and strong... she'd seen no evidence of anything else during their friendship. She thought of his hesitance when they spoke of their feelings. Could Caym's story be his reason? Maybe he was really a bad person, and he was just trying to save her from himself. Despite his loneliness and his past, perhaps he was still trying to be a good person.

"I don't know, Caym... Kougou has always been nice to me. He has never done anything like that to anyone else... maybe you're thinking of another person."

"Trust me," Caym said, holding her gaze, "it is Kougou Nagasawa. The same." Saikai lowered her eyes to their linked hands between them. "Don't you believe me?"

"I want to trust you... but I also want to trust him. Both of you have been kind to me... and he's never said anything about you, Caym. Why wouldn't he talk about you at least once?"

"Because he doesn't want to think about me. Even though he does bad things, he does feel sorry about them. It's not that he doesn't care about what's right and wrong, it's just that he cares about himself more." He squeezed her hands. "You see him every day, right? I know you like him, Saikai, but I can't watch you get hurt like that by him."

"How can you know how I feel about him?" she asked uncomfortably, looking at his pleading eyes. "You never see us together, and I haven't talked to you about him before."

"I have friends who go to school with you, Saikai. They tell me gossip about you sometimes because they know we're friends too, and I've heard a lot about you and him." He released her hands. "Maybe it's too much for me to ask you to promise you won't be his friend, but just keep what I told you in mind, okay? He's not the kind of guy you think he is." Caym stood up, smoothing his jacket.

"Wait, is that all you wanted to talk about?" Saikai asked, standing too. "Kougou Nagasawa?"

"I had hoped to talk to you about more tonight, but I should go," he said, smiling sadly. "Will you miss me?" She blushed. "I suppose that's an answer in and of itself." He turned to leave.

"Where are you going now?"

He turned and smiled reassuringly. "Don't worry about me." Only when he turned and began to walk away did she notice the glint of a knife in his pocket.



Saikai woke up to the sound of sirens in the distance. Ambulances. She rolled around uncomfortably on her bed, unable to sleep despite the calming sound of rain pattering against the rooftop. The sirens' wails pierced through the early morning grogginess. Saikai hugged her pillow, thinking about what had happened the day before. Two suicides. Kougou had opened up to her a little. Caym expressed his concern and told her a story about Kougou that seemed impossible. And she had finally opened up to Kougou about her hardships as well. The more she thought of Caym's story, the more outrageous it seemed. Maybe he was just jealous of Kougou, though that didn't seem likely.

After lying in bed for an hour or so, she got up and began to get ready for the day. She went about her morning routine very slowly, but still managed to prepare herself two hours early. Her grandmother was still sleeping. On a whim, she turned on the TV in her room and began watching the news to see when the rain would let up. Instead, there was a story being discussed.

"...two dead, one in critical condition, and four wounded, all in the matter of hours. Police have found nothing to link the victims together except for their city of residence. The injuries are too gruesome to show on the air. The most fortunate of the victims escaped with three broken bones. Most of the damage appears to have been inflicted with a blunt object such as a baseball bat, though it is clear that multiple weapons have been used, including a knife."

She switched off the TV uncomfortably and began to cook breakfast for her grandmother. When it was time to go, she was surprised to see Caym waiting for her outside. He was in a uniform, too, and smiling eagerly.

"Sorry, Sai-chan. I just couldn't get enough of you yesterday so I had to see you today, too. Do you mind if I walk you to school?"

"Um... sure," she said, closing the gate behind her. "But isn't your school the opposite way?"

"No, it's fine. I'm late today anyway," he said happily.

"Isn't it better to be just a little late than really late?" she asked, but began to walk in the direction of school.

He followed her, grinning. He looked so different this way, almost like a different person. "Not really. I'll get slapped for my tardiness either way. I'd rather make it count." He winked. "Besides, despite what I said last night, I kind of want to see my old friend... I wonder if he's different these days."

"You seem to be in a strange mood today, Caym."

"I'm just a happy guy, what can I say?" He smiled again, but it was a little more relaxed this time. "I'm out of school while my friends have to stay in and study. It feels kind of good to rebel every now and then. And I get to escort a beautiful girl. That's good, too."

Saikai blushed. "I wish you would stop saying things like that."

"Why? You don't like me?" he asked, frowning.

"Well, no, it's not that. It's just that we barely know each other, but you're acting so comfortable around me. I guess I just don't know how to feel about that."

"Should I be more formal?" he said, standing up straight with a stern expression on his face.

She laughed. "That's not what I meant."

"Okay then... what did you mean?" She looked at the ground. "Come on, Saikai. I'm trying."

"You're handsome," she said quietly. "You're mysterious, unique, and exciting. It's a little embarrassing for someone like me to walk with someone like you. People don't even like me at my school. I don't know how to feel about you. Sometimes you scare me, sometimes you make me curious, and sometimes I am embarrassed around you. You're just... confusing me."

"Is that good or bad?" he asked seriously.

"Both, I think. It's just something I'll have to get used to."

They finally arrived at the gates of the school where Kougou was talking with his friends from soccer. Saikai didn't approach them. Instead, she turned to face Caym. "There's Kougou. You should talk to him. If your story really is true, he's become a better person these days." She bowed a little. "Thank you for walking with me... I'll see you later."

"See you, Sai-chan," he said absentmindedly, his eyes already on Kougou.

Saikai sighed and walked inside.