Believe Me, I'm Lying

“So, Alex. You’re working on your portfolio, Jack said?”

Jack freezes, fork halfway to his mouth as his eyes land on Alex across the table. This will not go well, and he’s pretty sure of that. His fiancé sits beside him, hand on his knee and he really just wants to hit her. But that would probably look bad, he thinks.

“W-well,” Alex stutters, looking at Ashley with wide eyes, “You could say that, yeah.”

“That’s cool. I bet Jack’s a pretty good teacher.”

She winks and Alex and then takes a sip of her wine and Jack just really wants to lock himself in his room and crawl under the covers and lay there forever. Because this is beyond awkward and Ashley has no fucking idea. He wishes he had said no when she insisted that Alex stay for dinner. But he wasn’t sure if that would hurt Alex’s feelings or not so he just let it happen. Bad, bad idea.

“Yeah… He’s alright,” Alex responds, and Jack frowns.

“What’s your portfolio topic on? Did you pick yet?”

Fuck. This is when things are going to get even more fucking difficult, Jack realizes. His lie is coming back to bite him. Alex doesn’t know shit about art or portfolios or anything like that. He watches as the younger boy bites his lip, shifting uncomfortably under Ashley’s gaze.

“Uh, well it’s… It’s sort of…”

“Confidential, Ashley,” Jack interrupts, not being able to stand watching Alex struggle for an answer, “Nobody can know until the day of the art show.”

“Oh, wow,” Ashley smiles, putting her wine glass down, “Sounds like it’s going to be something good, huh?”

“Yeah. It’ll be awesome. But anyway-”

“Are you a full-time student, Alex?”

Jack groans quietly. Of course now Ashley decides to be hospitable and nice and friendly and everything she usually isn’t. “Why are you asking him such personal questions, Ash?” he says, interrupting Alex’s response, “Jeez, leave the kid alone.”

“Oh, I’m sorry Jack. Just trying to get to know him. It would be rude if I didn’t.” She glares at Jack, her hands braced on the table as if she’s about to push her chair out and get up to leave.

Sighing, Jack waves her off, “Never mind. I don’t want to fight with you.” And it’s true. He really doesn’t. It’s not worth it.

It’s awkwardly silent after that, and Jack tries to catch Alex’s eyes but Alex is looking anywhere but at him and Jack is pretty sure the younger boy is upset. Who wouldn’t be? It’s beyond awkward to have to eat dinner with your boyfriend and your boyfriend’s fiancé. Especially since it was just supposed to be them alone, without Ashley. It’s a pretty fucked up situation. And Jack feels awful that he’s putting Alex in it.

“Um, I actually have to get going,” Alex announces suddenly, “I have things to do.”

Jack watches from his seat as Alex puts his plate in the sink before heading over to the spot he left his shoes in. And then Ashley is elbowing him and hissing at him to go walk him down to the elevators because it would be really, terribly rude if he didn’t. So he gets up and just manages to catch the door before it slams shut as Alex takes off down the hallway.

“Alex!” he calls out, hoping the boy will slow down just a little bit because seriously, Jack was never a runner, “Alex, wait up!”

Luckily, the elevators are all the way up on the twenty-fifth floor so that has Alex standing there impatiently, pushing the down button violently. He glares at Jack as he gets closer and then turns away. “I don’t want to talk to you.”

“Well… Just listen, then, alright? I want to apologize – I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry that things have to be this way. If I could change them, I would but-”

“But that’s the thing, Jack,” Alex interrupts, turning back around. He’s crying. And Jack feels his heart twist painfully. “You can change things. It’d be so easy!”

“No, no it wouldn’t. It really wouldn’t and I’m sorry but this is just the way things have to be for right now, okay?” Jack takes a few steps forward, tentatively placing his hand on Alex’s shoulder. When the younger boy doesn’t shove him away or anything of the sort, he wraps both arms around his body and squeezes him tight. “I’m so sorry, Lex.”

Alex breathes in deep, his fingers twisting into the fabric of Jack’s shirt, “No, I’m sorry. I’m being selfish. I just really, really like you. And I hate that I have to share you.”

Jack will almost go as far as to say that he wants to die right now. He feels like shit – Alex isn’t selfish. Alex is far from selfish. “I like you too. And I promise what just happened in there won’t happen ever again. We just… we just won’t meet at my place unless she’s out of town, or something. Don’t worry. We’ll make this work. Because I know there’s something between us. Something great.”

“O-okay,” Alex nods, sniffling as he wipes his eyes and pulls away just as the elevator doors open. “Maybe one day this won’t be so complicated.”

Nodding, Jack watches as Alex steps into the elevator, waving slightly as the doors close. His heart sinks – almost as if it’s in that elevator with Alex, going down seventeen floors. He’s a shitty human being, he realizes. He’s so selfish but he doesn’t even care to change that. He wants Alex. And he wants his father’s company. He’s not going to accept that he can’t have both.

-

When he gets back inside his apartment, Jack finds Ashley in the kitchen where he left her, except now she’s washing the dishes from dinner. Thank God, because Jack really wasn’t in the mood to do them tonight.

“Alex seems nice,” She states as she places a dish back in the cabinet, “He seems smart, too. Does he do well in class?”

Jack just shrugs, not really up for having a discussion about Alex with her. He leans against the counters but she doesn’t seem to care that he’s not interested and just continues talking.

“He’s adorable, too. I bet he’s got a girlfriend.”

“He’s gay, actually.”

And he’s not sure why he said that. It might have been, of course, that he doesn’t want to think of Alex being with anyone else other than him, let alone a girlfriend.

At first, Ashley’s eyebrows raise and she eyes Jack with a bit of confusion. But then she shrugs it off and continues washing the plate in her hands, “Maybe you can set him up with Kyle.”

That’s the thing that breaks Jack out of his miserable mood. He laughs, softly at first, but getting louder as the seconds past until he’s doubled over, hands on his knees.

“What are you laughing at?”

“K-Kyle’s not gay!” He manages to say in between his laughter, standing up straight again, “He likes girls. He really likes girls.”

“Oh.” Ashley blushes, almost as if she’s embarrassed by her suggestion, and that makes Jack think that maybe she’s actually human. Maybe. “Oh, God, Jack please don’t ever tell him I said that! I may not be his biggest fan but I definitely don’t want him to know that I said that.”

She stares at Jack, who’s still laughing and eventually, a smile breaks out onto her face and she’s laughing right along with him. And seriously, it’s times like these that Jack thinks he’ll be able to stand her when they’re married. She’s really not so bad all the time, he realizes.