Believe Me, I'm Lying

“You know my offer still stands. And I really want you to take it.”

Alex shakes his head, reaching forward and pulling a box off the shelf. It’s a toy truck that moves by remote control and he feels like Devyn will like it so he throws it into his shopping cart and continues down the toy aisle. His cell phone is heavy in his hands and he kind of just wants to hang up on his brother and ignore him for the rest of his life. But that would be mean and he really can’t.

“I appreciate it, honestly. But I can’t,” he tells Josh for what feels like the millionth time “Jack… I know how you feel towards him and I understand completely. But I really can’t. Jack’s my boyfriend and I like him. A lot. And Devyn loves him. I don’t know why but he’s grown so attached to him and it would kill him if I took him away from Jack.”

“What do you think is going to happen when he marries his fiancé? Alex, he’s not going to have time for you or Devyn. He’s going to move into a house with his wife and he’s going to start his own family. I’m sorry, bro, seriously I am but he’s not going to pay much attention to you once January first passes. And you’ll be better off if you move in with me. I move to New York on December 20th. I could have your stuff moved in the next day.”

Alex sighs angrily and closes his eyes, trying to remind himself that he shouldn’t blow up at Josh – he’s just trying to help. “I understand what you’re saying but it doesn’t change my mind. I’m not moving to New York. It’s not happening.”

“I wish you would seriously think about it.”

“I wish you would accept my decision and quit bothering me.”

With that, Alex hangs up and shoves his phone back into his pocket. He’s getting so sick of everyone trying to tell him what to do. He’s got his brother plus Zack and Rian constantly on his back about leaving Jack. But they don’t understand. He loves Jack. He really does. It’s only been a few months and he hasn’t exactly told the older boy that yet but he does. He’s never felt this way for anyone. He’s selfish, yeah, but maybe he just wants to keep this one good thing for as long as he can. No matter when it happens, Devyn’s going to be upset when Jack stops coming around.

After picking two more toys to give Devyn for Christmas, Alex decides that that’s really all he can afford right now. Christmas is still three weeks away. He has time to pick up a few extra shifts at work and hopefully he’ll be able to get Devyn a few more things. He knows it’s not the quantity that counts but still. He just wants his son to have a good Christmas, that’s all.

On the topic of Christmas gifts…What does he get for Jack? Does he even bother to get Jack anything? Alex sighs quietly as he leaves the store with the two plastic bags in his hands. He should probably start thinking about it. Maybe he should ask Jack what’s going on. Who knows if he’ll even see Jack at all that day.

When he gets back into his apartment, Alec can instantly tell that something’s wrong. Zack is quick to stand up from the couch he was sitting on and he keeps running his hands through his hair nervously. Alex looks around the small apartment and doesn’t see Devyn anywhere in sight so instantly he thinks something’s wrong with his son.

“What happened?” he asks, panic lacing every word. “Is Devyn okay?”

“Yeah, yeah Devyn’s fine,” Zack assures him, putting both hands on Alex’s shoulders. “It’s just that someone kind of came knocking on your door today.”

“Well…Um. Who?”

“Well I was just sitting in the kitchen making Devyn’s lunch and when someone knocked I was kind of surprised because you didn’t mention anyone that might stop by so I just ignored it. But then they just kept knocking and Devyn kept giggling and they could totally tell that someone was home. So I went to look through the little hole thingy that lets you see outside and fuck, Alex I had a heart attack.”

“Can you just tell me who the hell it was? And where is Devyn anyway? Is he sleeping?”

“Yeah he’s in his bed but Alex… It was Nicole.”

“W-what?” Alex can practically feel the color drain from his face as he stares at Zack with a look of disbelief. He hasn’t heard from Nicole since the day she left for school. Why would she want to talk to him now? “You didn’t let her in, did you?”

“No! No I ignored her. But I feel like she’ll be back. I just… I don’t… What do you think she wants?”

Alex bites his lip and moves his eyes to Devyn’s door and Zack does the same. They both know what she probably wants and Alex isn’t too sure if he’s going to be able to stop her.

“I don’t want to think about this right now-”

He’s interrupted by the house phone ringing and Zack jumps at the noise, startled. He follows closely as Alex goes to reach to pick it up, hands shaking slightly. He already knows who it’s going to be.

“Hello?” He twists the cord around his finger, eyeing Zack with desperation. He doesn’t want to do this.

“Hey. It’s me. Nicole. Long time, huh?”

She sounds exactly the same as the day she left but her voice is ten times more intimidating then it was back then.

“Uh, y-yeah.” Alex clears his throat, looking to Zack for some sense of comfort. The younger boy widens his eyes, signaling that he really has no comfort to offer. He’s just as confused as Alex is. “Nicole…Can I just… How did you get my number? And address, actually.”

“Your grandparents. I called their place and they gave me all I needed to know. So why didn’t you answer your door before? I’m pretty certain that you were home. I heard laughing.”

“That wasn’t me. I was at work and then had some things to do. Zack was um.” He pauses, not exactly wanting to mention their son but he’s going to have to. “He was watching Devyn and-.”

“Oh, so can I stop by again a little later?”

“I don’t understand… Why are you suddenly getting in contact with me?”

“Well I graduated pre-med early. I’m getting ready for Med school now and I’m back in Maryland visiting. I wanted to see you. Catch up.” She pauses and Alex knows that’s not all she wants to do. He’s waiting for her to say it. She’s always been one to get right to the point. “And I kind of want to discuss having custody of Devyn.”