DaySleeper

I wake up the next day to Greg shaking me.

“Come on, bro, we’re working on the shelter in a few hours. Time for breakfast,” he says. I nod and rub my eyes, rolling over. “Up, up, up!” he cheers, leaving the room. I sit up and lean over, opening my suitcase and pulling my hoodie out. I yank it over my body and roll out of the bed, pushing my hair out of my face. Everyone else has filed out of the room. I rub my face and yawn. I bend back over and pull on a pair of socks and stand up, adjusting my pajama pants. I leave the room, rubbing my eyes.

I hear everyone talking in the kitchen, so I head down the steps after going to the bathroom, and find Ethel making breakfast for everyone. I open the fridge tiredly and pour a glass of orange juice into a waiting cup.

“Morning, baby,” Ethel says. I look up, twisting the cap back on the orange juice, and smile tiredly at her. “Tired?” she asks.

“Yeah,” I reply, yawning.

“Well, we will not be starting to paint Wing A for a couple more hours,” she says. I put the orange juice back, drink the glass, and say that I am going back to bed.
Avid and I lock eyes for a moment as I excuse myself without eating anything, and Ethel makes Greg apologize for not thinking about the jetlag. I give Greg a half smile before I leave the kitchen and begin the trek back up to my temporary bed.

“Why don’t you say something to that boy?” Ethel scolds. I imagine it must be Avid, but I feel like I am the only one noticing how strained we are.

Regardless, I fall into my bed, pull the blankets back up, and fall back asleep, nearly instantly.

~~
I am woken up at noon.

“Come on,” Ethel says, “Time for the big boys to paint for little old me.”

I grumble.

She hits me softly in the back of my head. I sit up, complaining and pull off my hoodie. She leaves the room, and I change my clothes. Basically, all the old clothes I have will be trashed today.

I tromp down the steps loudly and go into the kitchen for a glass of water before painting.
“Don’t you want to eat something, honey?” Ethel coaxes.
“I'm not hungry,” I reply, and begin to leave.

“Cadence. I said you looked healthy. Not in perfect health. Don’t get back into that, okay?”

“I wasn’t planning on it, gorgeous,” I promise, and kiss her cheek before I head out the front door and cross the road to the shelter.

Men are everywhere inside, crossing the repaired dining hall to the kitchen and the rooms they’re rebuilding. It tastes like saw dust in here.

I go straight to the group of us that are painting.
I don’t say much all day. I just help paint the trim in the room. Avid stays 20 feet away at all times and my jaw tightens all day until it reaches a painful level and I loosen it for a minute.

Ethel gives me a concerned look when I go straight upstairs at the end of the day.

“Avid!” I hear her yell. I grimace and grab a change of clothes and head to the bathroom.

~~
I get in bed after my shower. I hear everyone downstairs having dinner. Footsteps on the staircase catch my ear. Ethel comes in.

“Cadence.” She says. The dark room leaves her practically blind.

“Yeah?”

“You have to eat something,” she says.

“Ethel—”

“No. Alice might be fooled, and Maggie might let it pass, but you can’t fool me, honey. You’ll eat for me.”

I sigh, sitting up.

“I don’t want to sit with them.”

“What? Why not?”

“I'm an outsider. They’re all friends.”

“Avid is your friend.”

I laugh.

“Cadence—” she begins.

“No, Ethel, I am sorry. I know he thinks he is. But friends don’t not call for three months and then pretend like they’ve never seen me before when I get back,” I bite out.

“You didn’t call him either.”

I don’t speak for a moment.

“He didn’t want to be here with me before the fire. Why would I presume to call him?”

She sighs.

“I’ll talk to him.”

“Don’t. It’s fine. I'm just… so tired. It’s no one’s fault. I promise I’ll have a big breakfast tomorrow, okay?”

She seems to consider this.

“Okay, honey. Sleep well.”

“Love you, Ethel.”

~~
I keep my promise. I wake up early, creep out of the room and head downstairs. Ethel is working on breakfast already and I help her.

“We really missed you,” she says, laying bread out on the cookie sheet and putting it into the oven to toast. I keep on mixing the eggs.

“I missed you guys too,” I say.

“Living up to the dream, yeah?” she asks.

“Being here?” I ask, glancing at her. She gives a small nod. “Yes and no.”

“I feel you, babe. It won't be the same again. It might get closer to normal when the place is built back up, but it’s been kind of a ghost town.”

“I can see that,” I reply.

“It’ll be done soon. Some of the ladies will come back, new people will come, life will move on.’

“What will I do?” I ask her. She looks at me.

“I thought you knew.”

“Whatever gave you that idea?” I ask.

“You’re here, aren’t you?”

“It would appear so.”

“Don’t be smart.” She scolds.

“Sorry,” I mumble.

“I'm just saying that you moving back out here would say that you got a direction in life. One that involves this place.”

“Ethel—”

“Now, don’t break an old woman’s heart,” she says, putting the juice out on the counter,
“Just tell me you’ll stay awhile.”

“Of course I will,” I promise, “Just… what comes after?”

“Honey, if I knew that, they’d have statues in my honor, wouldn’t they?”

“What’s going on?” a voice says. I turn and meet Avid’s eyes.

“Talking about the future,” Ethel tells him. He continues to stare at me, and I feel my face heat up.

“Oh,” he replies, and enters the room, taking a seat. Ethel pulls the toast out of the oven and makes me a plate.

“Now, you’ll eat all of this,” she says, patting my shoulder. I roll my eyes and sit down at the seat farthest from Avid. I push my food around and take a bite. I look up and our eyes lock.

All the other volunteers, Greg, Mathew, and Jade come into the kitchen with mumbled greetings. Mathew sits down next to Avid, and pushes his shoulder a bit as a greeting. I look away first, back to my food and mash up my eggs and toast. Conversation starts slowly around me. I finish eating and go wash my plate.

“Cadence?” someone says. I glance behind me and they’re all staring at me. Jade had spoken.

“Yeah?” I ask.

“Play cards?” she asks. I freeze, my hands still under the warming water. I turn back to the sink as I gasp. The water’s temperature spikes and scalds me. I curse and drop the plate into the sink with a clatter and turn the faucet to cold.

I put the clean plate up and turn back to them.

“You okay?” Jade asks, standing next to me. I jump.

“Yeah,” I mumble, examining my reddening hand. I look up at her. “What game?”

A smile spreads on her face.