And The Headphones Drop (To the ground)
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My name is Grace. I learned this a few years ago, if you turn your headphones up loud enough you can drown out the world. Headphones protect you that way, they drown out everyone else's remarks. The only bad thing is that you can still hear your thoughts. The thoughts that run through your head everyday. The ones that keep you awake at night, the ones you're dying to get rid of but can't. My mind taunts me, haunts me, and tricks me. It deceives me but can still think logically at times. In short my own thoughts are my worst enemy. I always thought that what others thought of me would hurt so much worse. It didn't end up being that way though. I found that out the hard way.1
I've struggled with keeping my thoughts silent, but then they travel to my heart. Soon my heart is against me as well. Two against one in a never ending war. Two demons working on the same plan, tearing my heart apart, making me lose sanity. It all falls apart, shattering the mirror. I'm a puzzle with missing pieces, ironically enough, the puzzle is supposed to be a pair of headphones. The headphones are my shelter, they keep me safe and distant. I shut out the world because I have no interest in it. Correction, they were my shelter. They were my shelter until they couldn't protect me from myself. Insults shouted in my mind made it to my heart and broke it. I turn up the headphones louder. Trying to block out the hurtful words. It's no use, the thoughts still come through. So I turn them up louder but the insults keep coming. They say the same thing over and over again, 2
"Give up."3
"Quit trying."4
"It's no use."5
I struggle to believe what the truth is. The music coming from my headphones has deafened me from the light. I can no longer hear the good in life. Suddenly the headphones have taken control of themselves. Making the volume go louder and louder until I'm sure I will be permanently deaf. The music that had comforted me was now being used against me. I cover my eyes but the music combines with the thoughts. The insults are now on beat and I have to wonder if I will ever break free from my thoughts...6
No matter how loud the music is, your thoughts always find a way through.
I've struggled with keeping my thoughts silent, but then they travel to my heart. Soon my heart is against me as well. Two against one in a never ending war. Two demons working on the same plan, tearing my heart apart, making me lose sanity. It all falls apart, shattering the mirror. I'm a puzzle with missing pieces, ironically enough, the puzzle is supposed to be a pair of headphones. The headphones are my shelter, they keep me safe and distant. I shut out the world because I have no interest in it. Correction, they were my shelter. They were my shelter until they couldn't protect me from myself. Insults shouted in my mind made it to my heart and broke it. I turn up the headphones louder. Trying to block out the hurtful words. It's no use, the thoughts still come through. So I turn them up louder but the insults keep coming. They say the same thing over and over again, 2
"Give up."3
"Quit trying."4
"It's no use."5
I struggle to believe what the truth is. The music coming from my headphones has deafened me from the light. I can no longer hear the good in life. Suddenly the headphones have taken control of themselves. Making the volume go louder and louder until I'm sure I will be permanently deaf. The music that had comforted me was now being used against me. I cover my eyes but the music combines with the thoughts. The insults are now on beat and I have to wonder if I will ever break free from my thoughts...6
No matter how loud the music is, your thoughts always find a way through.