The epitaph of my life
CHAPTER 1: WAGING THE WAR
"Sometimes you have to kinda die inside yourself in order to reborn from your own ashes and believe and love yourself"
That was what I expected to happen. Rebirth from the shit that my life had become
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CHAPTER 1: WAGING THE WAR
<<"Where is the damn coffee?!>>
Perfect! It was 5 am, not only had I woken up early but now someone had the bright idea of finishing the fucking coffee.
I was wrapped in the blanket I had brought from my bed - it was 2 ° C and my butt was frozen among other things ... Passing through the dining room, I look to see a boy with tousled hair, pale, haggard and sleepy to death. I raise an eyebrow, as if my mirror image would change just because I didn’t like it.
I trembled as I climbed the stairs and pressed my hands to my chest, trying to control it. I took a pair of black jeans, a huge black sweatshirt with white stripes and a red jacket, which weighed about the same as me.
I dressed as fast as I could trying not to drop the blanket in the process, when I’m ready I run a brush over my hair a few times and then head out into the frozen street.
I was tired of school. It didn’t prepare me for REAL LIFE. It was a gross waste of time, effort and money. I didn’t know whether to go to school today or not ...
I walked through the empty streets, everything looked clearer in the morning.. I hated it
Arriving at the bus stop I decided to go to school, but only go to art. Or maybe chemistry ... the last time I didn’t go I had left my lab partner, Jamia alone and she was furious, she had reported me to the headmaster who was a bitch…
FUCK THEM!
Whatever, one more day, one day less. I sat in a lonely corner where it used to be when I didn’t entered one class, put on my headphones ready to fall asleep.
I had not been there five minutes when, surprisingly, some girls were there, even managed to hear a whisper "the blonde is over there,"
HOLY CRAP! No one ever went by those directions ... except when I needed peace! Also, what mattered that I was here? Anyway ! I’ll try to think of other things.
Honestly, I cannot remember how I’m still here, I spent the worst two years of my life here, full of shit people coming and going, hypocrites who try to be your friend only to become popular and harass you wherever you go, plus some ignore you as if you are part of the school facilities.
Yep, I have been here for 2 ½ years (to be exact) full of crap, using the disguise of "I'm fine, I’m just sleepy" every time someone asks me if I’m ok.
For me it would be easy to quit, to not go to class, and do anything I like. I could eventually stop coming to school but they’d call home and that's when I’d have to face my mother, but ultimately I would be free from this absurd monotony.
Most people say that school is the most important thing in life, that you must be crazy if you wanna leave it , for my part, I want to get out as soon as possible.
A wave of cold wind interrupted my thoughts, I couldn’t feel my ass. I can’t sleep with that fucking cold.
I choose to wake up and start writing something I had in my mind, so I take out the ibuprofen I have in the backpack, along with a can of cola . I take 2 and I start to feel more awake ... fast acting .... Wow! Another pill. I think this was a good idea ... Why the fuck didn’t I try this before? One more pill ... fuck it! Now I feel like I have Tachycardia, to my horror my heat is pounding, ready to surrender at any time. I was trapped in my own body, I could not utter any sound, or scream, or kick, or move ... SHIT! I was completely paralyzed. I couldn’t do anything more than listen to the sound of my heart pumping like crazy .... I feared.
I spent what seemed like hours to me, my heartbeat was as crazy as they were. Stupid.
How could I do that?!
I have always done that kind of thing but I had never done that without having something to eat first
Every minute that passed I lost hope that someone would find me, so I lay on the frozen floor with my heart screaming. A little sunlight shined on my face making me close my eyes.
And finally after all this time it happened.
Original post in here: http://mcrhelenacullen.obolog.com/chapter-1-waging-the-war-1003587
That was what I expected to happen. Rebirth from the shit that my life had become
-------------------------------------------------------------
CHAPTER 1: WAGING THE WAR
<<"Where is the damn coffee?!>>
Perfect! It was 5 am, not only had I woken up early but now someone had the bright idea of finishing the fucking coffee.
I was wrapped in the blanket I had brought from my bed - it was 2 ° C and my butt was frozen among other things ... Passing through the dining room, I look to see a boy with tousled hair, pale, haggard and sleepy to death. I raise an eyebrow, as if my mirror image would change just because I didn’t like it.
I trembled as I climbed the stairs and pressed my hands to my chest, trying to control it. I took a pair of black jeans, a huge black sweatshirt with white stripes and a red jacket, which weighed about the same as me.
I dressed as fast as I could trying not to drop the blanket in the process, when I’m ready I run a brush over my hair a few times and then head out into the frozen street.
I was tired of school. It didn’t prepare me for REAL LIFE. It was a gross waste of time, effort and money. I didn’t know whether to go to school today or not ...
I walked through the empty streets, everything looked clearer in the morning.. I hated it
Arriving at the bus stop I decided to go to school, but only go to art. Or maybe chemistry ... the last time I didn’t go I had left my lab partner, Jamia alone and she was furious, she had reported me to the headmaster who was a bitch…
FUCK THEM!
Whatever, one more day, one day less. I sat in a lonely corner where it used to be when I didn’t entered one class, put on my headphones ready to fall asleep.
I had not been there five minutes when, surprisingly, some girls were there, even managed to hear a whisper "the blonde is over there,"
HOLY CRAP! No one ever went by those directions ... except when I needed peace! Also, what mattered that I was here? Anyway ! I’ll try to think of other things.
Honestly, I cannot remember how I’m still here, I spent the worst two years of my life here, full of shit people coming and going, hypocrites who try to be your friend only to become popular and harass you wherever you go, plus some ignore you as if you are part of the school facilities.
Yep, I have been here for 2 ½ years (to be exact) full of crap, using the disguise of "I'm fine, I’m just sleepy" every time someone asks me if I’m ok.
For me it would be easy to quit, to not go to class, and do anything I like. I could eventually stop coming to school but they’d call home and that's when I’d have to face my mother, but ultimately I would be free from this absurd monotony.
Most people say that school is the most important thing in life, that you must be crazy if you wanna leave it , for my part, I want to get out as soon as possible.
A wave of cold wind interrupted my thoughts, I couldn’t feel my ass. I can’t sleep with that fucking cold.
I choose to wake up and start writing something I had in my mind, so I take out the ibuprofen I have in the backpack, along with a can of cola . I take 2 and I start to feel more awake ... fast acting .... Wow! Another pill. I think this was a good idea ... Why the fuck didn’t I try this before? One more pill ... fuck it! Now I feel like I have Tachycardia, to my horror my heat is pounding, ready to surrender at any time. I was trapped in my own body, I could not utter any sound, or scream, or kick, or move ... SHIT! I was completely paralyzed. I couldn’t do anything more than listen to the sound of my heart pumping like crazy .... I feared.
I spent what seemed like hours to me, my heartbeat was as crazy as they were. Stupid.
How could I do that?!
I have always done that kind of thing but I had never done that without having something to eat first
Every minute that passed I lost hope that someone would find me, so I lay on the frozen floor with my heart screaming. A little sunlight shined on my face making me close my eyes.
And finally after all this time it happened.
Original post in here: http://mcrhelenacullen.obolog.com/chapter-1-waging-the-war-1003587