Going Down In Flames

I had been awake for hours, propped up in my bed resting my head on the wall behind me. I didn’t want to get out and face everyone, who knows what they thought of me. To start off with i lied to Travis and created a fight between us than to top it off Jim and Travis had to perform at damsel in distress rescue on me. The last few days i had cried more than i had in the last few months, Travis’s effect on me wasn’t pleasant.

Multiple knocks on my closed door interrupted my thoughts; i looked up to Jolene peering into my room with caution. I smiled a faintly and she took several steps into the room.

"Morning, sorry if i woke you"

"You didn’t, i was already awake"

"Oh right..." she trailed her words.

"Did you need something?"

"Yeah, well i feel really bad for asking but Jim said something the other day about you being really good with makeup, hair, and clothing – stuff like that. I was just wondering if you could help me tonight, i have a date" she blushed and bit her lip.

"Don’t feel bad I’d love to help you. Who’s the lucky guy?"

"Um, do you know Scott Plamer? His been on Nitro Circus a few times"

"I think so, his the guy that has a bit shorter than shoulder length hair right?"

"Yeah that’s him. On the show we’ve always been hanging out and flirting, stuff like that. Then the other night we were all hanging out here and he pulled me aside and asked me to go out on a date with him"

"That’s adorable. Do you know where he is taking you?"

"Nope. All he said to me was to dress nice and look as beautiful as you do usually" she blushed again, not able to contain her smile.

"Someone has a crush!" i nudged her playfully.

"Shut up!" she lightly pushed me "I have no idea what to wear!"

"Well, do you have any dresses or heels?"

"I have a few, come on I’ll show you" she pulled me out of bed.

I was still in my checked short shorts when Jolene pulled me into the hallway of Travis’s gigantic house. With her hand tightly connected around my wrist she led me down to her room. A half asleep Travis slumped out of his room, running his hands through his curls, his eyes fluttering a little when he seen me. I couldn’t control my eyes when they gazed over his bare chest, the perfectly shaped lines of his muscles. A few scars caught my eyes, the imperfections on his seemingly perfect chest.

Jolene cleared her throat, gaining back my attention. She pulled me into her room; Travis looked emotionless at me before walking back down to his room. I could feel Jolene watching me as my eyes followed Travis’s figure walking to his room.

"You like him hey?" Jolene blurted out.

"NO!" i sneered.

"Ally, i haven’t known you for very long at all but you can’t hide it – especially from me. The way you were watching him it’s obvious you like him. And from what i heard about yesterday’s incident about the whole lying thing if you were willing to risk Travis finding out who you actually where just for him not to treat you differently because of your brothers relationship with him. I think that’s pretty good evidence for my argument"

"Okay, i guess i do. I’ve always had a thing for him despite it being so long since I’ve seen him if i ever seen him on TV or something my heart would race and i would get a funny feeling in my stomach"

"See, was that so hard to admit?"

"Well no, but i thought after yesterday everyone would have the worst opinions of me and these weeks i would spend here would be just filled with people snickering behind my back"

"You’re wrong on that one. Everyone here tends not to get involved in with other people’s business unless it actually concerns them. No one has any bad opinions of you, i promise"

"Thanks" i smiled with huge relief "now show me
these dresses"

Jolene complied and headed to her wardrobe and pulled out the dresses she had. Sure they were nice but for a date with Scott who she obviously had a huge crush on she needed to look hot.

"These won’t do, we need to go shopping. We need to make you that hot so Scott won’t be able to keep his eyes let alone his hands off you" i grinned.

"Oh god, what have i got myself into!" she pretended to bang her head on the wall.

"Shut up you! Let’s go!"

Before we left i made a quick trip back into my room throwing on some ripped jeans, a plain shirt and converses quickly applying some makeup and running a brush threw my hair. Satisfied with the outcome i headed downstairs to find Travis, Jim and Jolene sitting on the lounge having a good old chat.

"Alright I’m ready" i said completely ignoring the other two.

"Where are you going?" Jim asked, Travis’s eyes never left you.

"Jolene and i are going shopping she needs to look hot for tonight"

"What’s tonight?" Travis interrupted.

Jolene looked at you with eyes wide open obviously she didn’t want the guys to know just yet that she was going out with Plamer, just because they would joke around and be dicks about the whole situation. Shit Ally, fuck! Quick, think of a lie.

"Were all going out tonight!" i lied.

"Are we now?" Jim asked.

"Yep, and if you old farts decide you don’t want to come out because you might pop out a hip in attempt to dance than you have fun sitting at home. Were going out regardless of what you all decide, Plamer is coming as well so you and the crew are welcome to join"

"Okay, now let’s go!" Jolene rushed me out the door.

She grabbed her keys on the way and we both jumped into the car, she turned the ignition and back out of the drive way. We hit the main road the radio gently playing a tune in the background.

"How the hell are you going to make this work?" Jolene asked.

"Easy peasy. Come with us to wherever were going out to, bring your car. Stay for a little while and then say you’re going to the toilet, leave go to your date with Plamer and when you’s are finished wherever you’s are going bring him back to the club" i smiled in accomplishment.

"I guess this could work, thanks for the quick thinking cover up"

"No problem" i said.

Moments later we pulled into a car park and proceeded to walk into the shops. We searched threw a few shops finding a great load of nice dresses and outfits. After Jolene and I had probably maxed out our credit cards we were satisfied enough with the 13 bags we shared between us and headed back to her car, returning back to Travis’s. We actually spent a good 3 hours shopping, i guess time fly’s when you’re having fun. I was so relieved that Jolene didn’t hate me, even more relieved that the feeling was mutual between the rest of the crew.

"Take the stuff upstairs ill be up in a minute, i want to go see Kirby" i smiled after getting out of Jolene’s car.

She just nodded in reply. I left the front door open for her as i walked through headed straight to the laundry, a little smile appearing on my face.

"Kirby!" i swung the door open in excitement expecting a bouncing puppy heading straight for me.

She wasn’t there, i started to panic a little searching frantically through every aspect of the laundry hoping that she was just hiding somewhere but she wasn’t hiding, she wasn’t there. I headed upstairs, pretty much jogging trying to find someone. I ran into Jim’s room, thankfully he was sitting on his bed playing with his phone.

"What’s up Al?" he asked.

"Do you know where Kirby is? She’s not in the laundry?" I said exceedingly quick.

"Don’t stress Al, the guys took her outside a little while after you left to play with her"

"Thank god! I could have died from shock, I’m going to go find her. Thanks!" i began to walk out of Jim’s room.

"Ally, wait!"

"Yeah?" i turned around to face him.

"I’m glad you and Jolene are getting along its good to see that you have made some friends. And..." here it comes the big brother lecture "...don’t lie like that again please, it puts me in a odd position"

"I didn’t lie, i merely neglected to mention the truth" i smirked earning a glare from Jim.

I walked downstairs with relief knowing that the guys would take care of her, who would want to hurt a adorable puppy? I walked out to the backyard hearing some calls of Kirby’s name, i smiled at the sound. I stopped in my tracks when i seen not the guys but merely Travis playing with Kirby. He was laying down on his back with Kirby licking his face. He picked her up and sat himself up, putting Kirby directly across from his face.

"Kirby is a naughty puppy isn’t she, yes you are" he sounded like a complete idiot but looked absolutely adorable.

My heart started beating faster, i collected all the confidence i could manage and walked towards him. Travis caught sight of me and placed Kirby on the ground. Her little legs bounding across the thick green grass as she ran towards me. I leant down and caught her when she jumped up to me, picking her up and patting her head with her soft panting and tail wagging making me smile. I walked towards Travis who was now standing up with a little smile on his face.

"I hope you didn’t mind me playing with Kirby"

"Hey you can do it whenever you want, she obviously loves you. Anyway she’s a puppy she has too much energy for her own good so it’s good for her to get out and try to use some of it up"

"Haha okay" he laughed.

"So are you coming out tonight?" i asked putting Kirby back on the ground letting her nibble at Travis’s feet.

"Yeah, everyone is. It will be a good night out, where are we going to go out to?"

"Thats the problem" i laughed "i haven’t been here in so long i don’t really know where any good places are, help?" i pleaded.

"Leave it up to me! There’s a place in town apparently it goes off!"

"Sounds perfect" i smiled "Say around 7 we leave here?"

"Yep, I’ll let everyone know"

"Okay thanks. By the way, is there any tattoo parlours around here?"

"Yeah there’s one in town, why?"

"Just have a new idea for some ink and I’m going to see what they come up with them once i share my idea"

"Haha, cool. What is it?"

"Its a surprise" i winked.

"Aw come on you can tell me"

"Well it wouldn’t be a surprise if i told you now would it" i shook my head and walked away leaving Kirby in the supervision of Travis.

I walked back up to Jolene, truth was i took a lot longer than i thought i would to get upstairs. Once i walked in she gave me an evil grin.

"What took you so long?"

"Well i couldn’t find Kirby so i had a bit of a heart attack, then Jim told me she was outside with the guys. I went out there to find Travis playing with her, we chatted and discussed tonight; everyone is coming out"

"Oh right, i guess i forgive you" she smiled.

"I’m going to take my stuff into my room than we can start making us two look super hot" i winked and grabbed my bags taking them to my room.

I searched through my gear finding my straightening iron, hair drier and a shitload of makeup all packed away in a beauty bag. Grabbing all of my gear i headed back to Jolene’s room.

"Okay i got everything i need" i said dumping everything on the bed.

"Are you sure? Looks like you got everything in your room"

"Hey, do you want to look hot or not?"

"Good point..."

"Go have a shower and put your dress on and take these" i handed her some sexy lingerie "I bought these while you were at the toilet while shopping"

"You’ve got to be kidding right?" her eye widened and held the lingerie up by the tips of her fingers.

"Nope, you have to have the whole package. There’s no point looking hot on the outside when you have grandma undies on and a bra that does nothing for you. Get going!"

"You will be the death of me!" i ignored her and pushed her in the direction of the bathroom in her room.

"I’m going to shower as well, I’ll meet you back here after I’m finished showering"

"You better have some of this lingerie as well, I’m not going in alone on this one!"

"Yes Jolene i promise, hush up!"

I had to laugh at Jolene’s inexperience in this area, she was so nervous about wearing some sexy lingerie it made me crack up so much on the inside. I did as i said and went back to my room grabbing the lingerie i needed before bringing it into the bathroom with my placing it on the basin before stripping down and getting into the shower. The warm water brushed against my skin, i leaned my head into the water wetting my hair, the water dripping down my face. I was so relaxed and calm, i washed my hair with a sweet scented shampoo and conditioner. I placed my hand on the tap ready to turn off the water, my eyes glanced at my wrists and their scars.My relaxation was soon filled with another feeling; disappointment.

A while ago, not really that long ago around a year i had went to a really depressed stage my life just didn’t seem fulfilling and i hated it. I had even taken some time of racing because i couldn’t cope. If anything went bad i would break down at the slightest most pathetic things i had so much pain, so much emotion boiled up inside of me any point of release and i would simple crumble. I began cutting myself, it was something that i thought was pathetic and unnecessary but it gave me a form of relief it became a little addictive. I never told Jim, i couldn’t imagine what his reaction would be to that, thats why i wanted a new tattoo. Despite the fact i loved my idea for it, i wanted to hide the scars and remove my temptation.

I shook of my thoughts and turned off the tap disappointed that my relaxing shower had came to an abrupt end. I dried my body and my hair with a thick white towel before slipping on my lingerie, i didn’t realise i had left my clothes in my room on my bed. Without care, knowing my door was shut i walked back into my room where i almost instantly lost the momentum of the movement. Travis’s eyes widened at the sight of my half naked body barely covered by the lingerie that was meant to be covering it.

"fuck – shit – sorry" he cursed and turned around facing the wall.