My Bulletproof Heart, Your Hollow Point Smile

A month has gone by, we're at the last day of school and then we begin winter break. Oh how I love breaks. They keep me sane enough to come back to school ready. I only have about six more months of school and I am off to college. To do what? Who knows.

The bell has ringed and I'm out the door. A girl, probably from a lower grade, bumps into me and I almost fall back on my ass. almost. I furrow my eyebrows and try to see where she went. But a pair of arms holds me in place. I move away, holding onto their arms to push away and straighten up. I turn around and find Gerard there with his girlfriend next to him.

Was he behind me this whole time?

Maybe...

"Uh thanks,"

I smile and scratch my neck. I look up at them; Marissa looks annoyed, as always. Gerard stares at her and I shake his head.

"No Pro-"

"Frank! Damn, I saw you get pushed by that chick. S'not cool, especially when you’re bigger than her,"

I turn around and Ashley is standing behind me with a knowing grin. She hugs me and I pout. She giggles and let's go of me and notices who was behind me.

"Oh, sorry, did I interrupt? I didn't mean to,"

"No it's cool; I was just saying no problem,"

"Oh... Okay,"

She offered a smile which Gerard returned but Marissa ignored. I sighed and pursed my lips. I looked back at Ashley.

"We should get going..."

"Yeah us too... Bye Frank, Ashley."

We said goodbye and walked to our last period. Ashley tugged at my elbow and smiled at me. I gave her a questioning look. She rolled her eyes and kept walking towards our class.

"What?"

"Oh nothing, I'll tell you after class."

She smiled at sat down at her seat. I took mine and stared at the side of her face in confusion. The teacher began talking and I looked up at her instead. She gave us worksheets to work on. When it was nearly ten minutes before the last bell we handed them back and fixed our bags. She let us move around and talk, lowly, of course. Ashley sat down next to me when the person left to go to the other side where her friends sat. She grinned.

"What?"

She shook her head and looked up at the ceiling. She sighed and patted my shoulder looking back at me with a faint smile gracing her features.

"You really don't know, do you?"

"No..."

"You like him?"

I furrowed my eyebrows.

Who is she talking- oh.

My eyes widened, I stuttered and looked around.

"What? Uh... no. Of course not,"

She stared at me with an unimpressed expression.

"I'm serious, I don't,"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes,"

She hummed and sat up from her hunched positioned when she was talking to me.

"Okay, well there's only a few seconds left, lets go to the door."

I nod and get up, slinging my bag on my back. I follow Ashley to the door where others are also stood. We walk out as soon as the bell rings. The teacher yells goodbye to everyone. I walk to my locker and dump my books inside. I barely move away from it when it's being shut closed. I jump and look to my right. Mikey crosses his arms and smiles.

"What are you two lovely people doing today?"

I shrug and look at Ashley. She shrugs too and looks at Mikey.

They've talked a few times, so I guess they consider each other friends. The three of us have hung out at times, either at my house or hers. Not at Mikey's for some unknown reason. Mikey remembers her as the pizza delivery chick, so he fools around with her saying when he can get a free pizza.

"Dunno,"

"Well, I was thinking since it is winter, why don't we go ice skating tonight?"

"I'm down, you?" I asked Ashley.

"Yeah I'll just run that by my mom,"

"Great, I've asked Alicia so it's settled."

"Ooo, Alicia,"

I smirk at him. He turns a light shade of pink and smiles. Ashley giggles and walks a bit down the hall.

"I'll meet you guys at your house yeah?"

She's looking at Mikey expectantly. I raise my eyebrows.

Oh yeah, because Mikey is taking us.

"Yeah sure, come on Frank,"

We wave goodbye and we walk to the other end of the hall. We bump into Alicia and she has her phone in her hand.

"I was just going to call you,"

"Oh, we were gunna go pick you up,"

They're so awkward.

I shake my head and smile at them. I say hi to her and she smiles. We walk out towards the parking lot and begin our walk to the Way's house. It takes us about ten minutes, speed walking, somehow.

We arrive at the door and I'm already tired from standing. Mikey opens the door and we walk in. I go over to the couch and drop myself down.

"Mind if I watch TV?"

"Dude you've been here a lot of times, of course."

See, even though I have been here multiple times, I still don't feel comfortable touching things without permission. Donna has run that by me, saying it's okay as long as I don't break it. When I would grab the control without permission I would feel bad for grabbing it, then I'd turn it off and put it back.

I turn it on and look through the channels.

"You guys want something to drink?" I hear Mikey say from the kitchen.

I reply saying, 'water is fine' and I look over at Alicia who is sat on the opposite side of the couch. She replies with a 'no, thank you.' Mikey comes back with a water bottle and plops himself down between us. He snatches the remote from me and continues to channel surf. A door upstairs is being shut. I presume it was Donna coming out of her room or Gerard. Another door is being opened then closed. The door bell rings and I get up to open it. Ashley is standing there, a car behind speeding off.

"She said it's cool,"

I nod and motion for her to come in. She shuffles in and sits next to Mikey. I close the door and return to the end of the couch. We sit there watching a movie. I don't know which one but it didn't grab my attention for long.

"So… at what time?"

"Let's go at five?"

"So... an hour doing what?"

"I don't know... Watch shitty movies?"

"Shitty movies bore me,"

"Okay well..."

"I want to nap,"

"Of course, because you didn't have enough during classes,"

"Hey, it's not my fault."

Mikey shakes his head. I look at the girls and they're trying to suppress a smile. I grin at them and shake my head.

"Don't laugh at me,"

"Why? You're so adorable,"

"Ashley, guys are not adorable, especially not me."

Ashley grins and laughs at my serious expression. I crack a smile.

"It's true; you can't say that, it doesn't make us sound manly."

"Oh you're manly?"

"Hey!"

"Hey,"

She smiles. I roll my eyes and look back at the TV.

"Mikey, don't you have any movies better than this?"

"Ugh, yes, but I'm just too lazy to get up."

I sigh loudly and palm my face. I look at him and he's frowning. I stare at him for who knows how long and he starts fidgeting. He throws his head back and groans. He shakes his head and shoots his hands up.

"Okay! Fine! Just stop staring at me!"

I crack a smile and look away. I feel the couch move and soft footsteps make their way up stairs. I hear giggling and look over at both of the girls.

"What?"

"Thank you. I thought we were gunna be stuck here watching that dumb movie,"

Ashley sighs and leans back, stretching for a bit. Alicia nods and smiles, as if to say thank you too. I smile back. Mikey comes back with a few movies. He shows us which ones and we end up picking the last one in the stack. He sets the others on the coffee table and goes over to the DVD player. He sits back down when he finishes putting in the movie. We all just slouch and watch the movie for the remaining of our forty minutes.

"Yeah no, you can't... Cus I'm busy!"

We all look over to the stairs where Gerard is walking down talking on his phone. He looks up and smiles at all of us and apologizes. He mutters a goodbye to the other person on the phone and apologizes again.

"It's cool; we were just heading out,"

Mikey gets up and pats his brother on the shoulder. He grabs his sweater and slips it on, grabbing the keys. He yawns and motions for us to stand. We do and stand next to him. Were all stood there, awkwardly, looking at Gerard.

"Where to?"

"Skating,"

"Skating?"

"Ice skating. We should be going now; there might be a long line if high schoolers decided to go there,"

"Oh, can I come with?"

"Uhh... Sure, but we have to take your car instead of mom's,"

"Okay."

We shuffle out of the house, Alicia and Ashley in front me with Gerard and Mikey behind. I shove my hands into my pockets and stop outside the doors of Gerard's car. He pulls out his keys from his jacket and opens the driver’s door. He unlocks all the doors and they all sit in the back.

"Oh thanks for making room guys."

I open the passenger seat and plop myself down. I close the door before slipping on the belt. I fold my hands on my lap and look at Gerard expectantly. He turns on the engine and drives out of the driveway. I look away and lean back on the headrest. It takes us about twenty minutes to get there. We arrive and we step out. I stretch and walk to the back of the car waiting on the others to hurry. They start walking ahead of me, I follow close behind.

"What time does it closes?"

"Uh... I'm guessing at 10."

"Okay."

We're at the front desk paying. The lady tells us to go straight down, to the right, and get our skates. We walk down the narrow hall. I start feeling the temperature drop and I instinctively shove my hands into my jacket. I go up to the counter and ask for my size. The man nods goes down to the back. He comes back and hands me the skates. I sit down on a bench and begin to pull of my shoes.

"Wait, are we getting a locker?"

I look at them all expectantly, they're all looking at each other until Mikey rolls his eyes and sighs.

"I'll get it."

He turns around and stands in front of the counter again. He asks the guy for a locker and pays him. The guy hands him a key and points to his right. Mikey nods and turns back around and walks towards us.

"One twenty-seven,"

I nod and walk over to the lockers with my shoes on one hand and the skates on the other. I stop in front of the 120s and locate the locker. Mikey hands me the key and I drop the skates next to my feet. I put in the key and turn it.

"Shoes in... Accessories too,"

We all shove our shoes inside before putting in our belongings... Well the girls belongings. We all squeeze onto the bench that was between the lockers and slip on our skates. I stand up and wobble around, trying to get out of the locker room. I hear a thud behind me and I turn around.

"What happened?"

"I fell," Ashley says behind the door.

She giggles. The door opens and she's outside stumbling over her skates. She holds onto me and smiles. I smile back and hold her up.

"If you're like this on carpet, I wonder what you're gunna be like on ice,"

She gasps and punches my shoulder. She laughs and shakes her head. I grin and look up. The rest come out with their arms extended.

"Alright let's get to the ice." Mikey says.

We nod and turn around. We head over to the ice ring and stand aside. We stand there for a minute or two watching other people skate. I tug on Ashley's sleeve. She looks at me and nods. We move over to the open door and I go in first. I try to keep balance and wait for Ashley to step in. She does as soon as she holds onto me.

"Don't let go of me, okay?"

She looks up at me expectantly and I grin.

"I'll try,"

I take hold of her shoulders and I begin to slowly skate with her on my side. I speed up a bit and her legs stiffen. She tries to move at the pace I'm in but only manages to make us both stop and trip. We're on our butts and were still holding onto each other. I could feel the cold through my jeans, they begin to get wet and I start to get on my knees.

"Well... At least I didn't let go?"

I give her an impish grin and she rolls her eyes.

"Just get me up before my ass goes numb,"

I chuckle and wipe my hands on my jeans. I hold out my hands and wait for her to wipe hers off her jeans. She holds onto my hand and I pull her up. As soon as she's on her feet her arms snake around my waist hugging me.

"What are you doing?"

"Holding on just invade if I fall again I fall on top of you,"

I laugh and shake my head. I stumble forward as someone shoves my shoulder. I accidentally let Ashley drop and gasp picking her up right away. She's grimacing and moving her hips.

"My butts all wet."

If I weren't glaring at Gerard who was the one to shove me I would have been giggling at Ashley's comment. I sigh and take hold of her elbows and skate us out of the ring. We shuffle over to the restrooms and stop right outside of the girls’ restroom.

"Yeah... I'll just wait out here,"

She nods and walks inside. I look back at the ring and try to look for the redhead that pushed me. I find him skating near the walls of the ring. I roll my eyes at him as soon as he catches my stare. I stalk off into the boys’ restroom and walk towards the sinks. I turn on both of the faucets, trying to get the water warm. I put my hands in trying to warm them up. The door to the restrooms opens and I quickly glance up to see who came in. I look back again and shut off the faucets, drying my hands on my jeans again.

"Oi! You redhead!"

"Sup,"

"Why the heck did you push me?"

I ask, ignoring his greeting.

"I did not,"

"You did. You made me drop Ashley,"

"S'not my fault she doesn't know how to skate..."

He mutters and walks over to the sink I was previously in front of. I raise an eyebrow and stare at the back of his head. I cross my arms and furrow my eyebrows. I see him smile from the mirror. He walks over to one of the stalls; he comes back out with toilet paper, drying his hands. He tosses the paper into the bin and turns around to smirk at me. I roll my eyes at him and sigh.

“Dude, what the hell is your problem?”

“Oh nothing,”

“Nothing? By the looks you keep giving Ashley and me, I wouldn’t say it’s nothing.”

“What looks?”

“Stop playing dumb with me Gerard. I know what you’re doing. Even during practices, school, and here,”

“Oh yeah? What am doing?”

He’s standing awfully close for my liking. I feel like dropping my gaze and moving away, telling him to forget it. Just like how he told me. But I am not going to let him off just that easy. Not again. Instead I sigh and shake my head.

“You’re riling me up, that’s what you’re doing.”

“You know, not everything is about you,”

I gape at him. I feel anger rising inside of me. I know I should never use violence, but Gerard is seriously pissing me off. He grins at my expression and I raise my clenched fist. Before I know it Gerard is holding it in his left hand. I stare at him with my eyes wide open. I shake my head and I’m angrier than before. He leans in closer to me. I can feel his breath slowly fallout from his parted lips. I feel his lips on mine; I can feel the light smirk forming. I shut my eyes close, stopping them from going cross eyed. He finally leans in all the way and his lips are fully on mine. We stay like that for a few seconds before he makes the first move.

He begins slowly, almost delicately, as if my lips were to vanish if he were to go fast. It takes me a few more seconds to react and kiss back gently. My fist still in his hand, he opens it, slipping his fingers in between mine. His other hand makes his way to my face and cups my right cheek. I raise my hands, setting them on Gerard’s hip. The kiss speed increases, but that only lasts for a few moments. I feel him lean away slowly. His hands are still in their place, but they soon move away too. I remove mine and drop them to my sides. I open my eyes and stare at the floor.

“We should get back outside.”

I feel a pang of sadness hit me. I nod and look up. I look around and suddenly remember where I’m at. I lick my lips and purse them before sighing. We move and head for the door. I walk out and breathe in the cool air from the room. I stop outside the girls’ restroom when I realize there’s someone standing in front of me.

“Thanks for waiting outside for me,”

She giggles. I shrug and we walk back to the ring. I look back and find Gerard long gone. I look back to Ashley who’s looking at the people skating.

“Hey you wanna go grab a bite to eat?”

“Sure.”

We walk back to the lockers and remove the skates before opening the locker and taking out our shoes and her bag. We close it and walk back to the counter. We drop off the skates and walk to the ring.

“Hey Mikes, were gunna go eat,”

“Oh wait for us, we’ll go too.”

I nod and wait for them to get out and go to the locker. Minutes later, were outside and walking back to the car. This time I beat Mikey and take the back seat. He’s grumbling nonsense under his breath. Gerard drives out of the parking lot and we begin our search for a restaurant.