My Bulletproof Heart, Your Hollow Point Smile

It's been a few days in to winter break and so far it's going okay. Ash went somewhere with her parents for the whole break so I'll be lonely. Of course I told Mikey this and he told me I could hang out with him, even though 'my girlfriend will stop by once in a while, so don't bother me on those times.' Sometimes Mikey is too hard to understand. I think he's texting her now. I think I might have to leave.

"Your lady is coming?”

"Yeah."

"Okay we'll I'm out, see you later."

"I'm with you on that,"

I turn around and look at Mikey then up at the stairs where Gerard was descending. He had his jacket in one hand and his keys on the other. He walks behind Mikey and ruffles his hair. He says bye and walks over to me. He pats my shoulder and walks past me to the door.

"Come on twinkle toes, I'll give you a ride."

"Twinkle toes?"

I look back at Mikey in disbelief. He shrugs and goes back to texting. I roll my eyes and walk out the door, shutting it behind me. I walk over to Gerard's car and stand outside the passenger seat. He looks up from his phone and grins at me. I look at him expectantly, waiting for him to get the hint to open the door. He pushes a button from his door and it clicks open. I jump in and slide the seat belt on.

"Alrighty," he scratches his nose and places his hand on the steering wheel, "all strapped in and ready to go."

"Uh... Are you pretending to be in a spaceship?"

"No, now hush."

He turns on the car and pulls out. I stare at my lap in confusion. I shake my head and glance at Gerard then at the radio. I reach out and turn it on, changing the station. I turn up the volume and nod lightly to the song. I whisper the lyrics to myself.

"What the hell is this?"

"It's called music, Gerard."

I reply and roll my eyes. I stare out the window and stare at the people driving buy us. Are we driving slowly?

"I know what that is genius, I meant: what is this fucker-y?"

"This fucker-y is my type of music... and it isn't fucker-y." I said as a matter of fact.

"Well, your taste in music sucks,"

"Hey, fuck you. I think my taste in music is great and whoever doesn't think so is lame and probably smells weird,"

"Hey, I do not smell weird... I think."

I lean over slightly and sniff him in. He leans the other way and he gives me a freaked out look. I chuckle and sit back. I sit there thinking. I hum and think of something to say to him. He stops at a stop sign, waiting for the other driver to pass.

"You kind of smell like hair dye... and coffee."

"Uh... Is that a good thing?"

"Of course. Unless people don't like that smell then I guess you're fucked."

"Thanks for making me feel a whole lot better about my odor."

I grin at him and ignore his sarcasm. I look back at the road and furrow my eyebrows. He passes a few houses and trees start coming into view.

"Hey, Gerard? Where are you taking me? You don't even know where I live."

"Eh, I just felt like driving to the park. I got a glove, a ball, and a bat in the back. I thought maybe we could practice for a bit."

"Oh... okay then."

He drives half way around the park and finds a parking space. We get out and Gerard opens the back door to the car. He brings out two gloves and hands them over to me. I hold onto them and start walking toward the fields. I hear the alarm being set and the soft crunch of grass behind me. We go into one of the fields that weren’t used by other people. I go over to the grass area and slip on a glove. I toss the other one to Gerard and he drops the ball and bat. I walk over to him and pick up the ball. I begin tossing it above my head and catching it with my left gloved hand. He clears his throat and walks a few yards away from me.

"Ready?"

"Yeah."

I begin tossing the ball first, trying to warm up. It isn't our regular warm up but it'll do. He catches it with ease and throws it back the same way. After a few tosses we begin throwing it. His speed is slightly faster than mine since he's been playing longer than I have. Every few catches my palm would hurt.

"Hey man, that hurts stop throwing them too hard."

"You're probably catching them all wrong."

"No, I know how to catch. It’s just that you throw them too hard."

"Okay I'll try to slow it down."

Instead of doing exactly what he said he threw the ball even faster. It hurt to catch that one. I widen my eyes at him and threw him the ball at what I hope was his speed. When I do he fails at catching it. It rolls into his glove but rolls back out and hits him square in the jaw. He drops his glove and cups his face. He starts making these weird faces and poking his tongue out. I just stare at him with wide eyes.

"Oh, shit. Gosh, I'm sorry Gerard, are you okay?"

I giggle even though I know this is serious shit. He looks back at me in bewilderment and keeps moving his jaw.

"Yeah, I just can't feel that spot on my face... and stop laughing."

"I'm sorry."

"You better be."

I roll my eyes at him and pick up his glove handing it over to him. I take the ball with me and walk back to my spot. I turn in my spot and almost fall on my ass. Gerard was standing right behind me.

"What the fuck? You scared-"

"Don't roll those pretty eyes at me."

He grabs my chin and lifts my face up. He looks around and then leans in planting a kiss on my lips. He pulls away and walks back to his place. He faces me and smiles.

I barely have time to process everything that just happened. I shake it out and sigh. I take my position and throw the ball. It goes on and on like that for half an hour. We finally quit and lay down on the grass, staring at the clouds and birds pass by.

“What was that back there?”

“Back where?”

“You know, the kiss.”

“It was just a kiss, Frank.”

Just a kiss.

That killed me.